


Nonverbal Communication

by Lacy_Star



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: ... probably, :3c, Anyways, Bad Puns, CHRIS IS THAT A WEED, Drugs, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, Light Angst, M/M, Marijuana, Post-Squip, References to Drugs, They're all stupid, aka do you wanna hang stuff, almost nonexistent, author has never seen a weed in her life have patience, homo zone- the nonexistent ship, michael is dumb, probably, so is Jeremy, so is dustin tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2020-01-23 04:39:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 43,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18542449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lacy_Star/pseuds/Lacy_Star
Summary: Wave (gesture)- verb:A wave is a nonverbal communication gesture that consists of the movement of the hand and/or entire arm that people commonly use to greet each other but can also be used to say goodbye, merely acknowledge another's presence, call for silence, or deny someone. The different ways humans communicate with each other are plentiful, the wave gesture is one of the clear examples of how researchers get a better understanding of how they are essential part to language and thought.---In which Jeremy (reluctantly) tags along to witness a drug deal and gets a boyfriend out of it.





	1. In Which Jeremy Witnesses a Drug Deal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao hi quark hi soph
> 
> this is your guys' fault. :)

Don’t get him wrong- Jeremy liked weed.

He just didn’t know anything about it. Michael was the one who got it and he tended to roll his smokes the best. He handled the logistics and money, and Jeremy- who was terrified of authority and getting caught in general- left it to him.

But in late March, after many nights of staying up late, they had finally made it to the last level of Apocalypse of the Damned. They were planning on pulling an all nighter to finish it off and complete the game. And then, to celebrate, get high. You know, as any normal person would.

And it was all going to be great. Until tragedy struck.

Friday, right before eighth period, Michael bounded up to Jeremy in a panic, completely unaware to the people staring at him. Typical Michael.

Michael grabbed Jeremy by the shoulders and shook him, out of breath. “Jeremy- holy fuck it’s horrible-“

“What? What happened, is something wrong?”

Fire. Someone died. The squips were back. It had to be horrendous, Jeremy thought.

“We’re out of weed.”

Oh.

“Jesus fuck, Michael.” Jeremy put a hand over his own chest, relaxing instantly. Leave it to Michael to be overdramatic. “You scared the shit out of me.”

“I should hope so!” Michael rolled his eyes, “Our entire night is at stake!”

“Just go get some more.”

“Well, yeah, obviously. But… You need a ride home.”

That Jeremy did. He realized what Michael meant.

“... No.”

“Oh come on, it’s not that bad. It’ll be less than five minutes, and I’ve never gotten caught. You know that.”

Jeremy, realizing they were openly discussing drugs in the middle of a crowded hallway, lowered his voice. “But… what if I mess it up?”

“You wouldn’t have to do anything. Just be on standby. You could even wait by the car.”

“But then what if something happens to you and I’m not there!?”

“Oh my _God_ , Jeremy.”

The hallway was getting empty. They’d be late if they didn’t get a move on soon. Michael realized this and sighed.

“I’m just saying we’ve had this planned for months, but if you want the disappointment of sobriety-“

Too guilty and stressed to argue, Jeremy groaned, “Okay, fine. I’ll meet you after school. Now move it.”

Michael shot him a shit eating grin and gave him a pat on the back as he walked away.

Pushing the worry to the back of his mind, Jeremy steeled himself and hurried away to his next class.

* * *

“So… where behind the school?”

Jeremy felt like every sense was amplified. He never worried about police officers being around every corner in normal situations. Why now?

Michael shook his head. “Are you kidding? No. That’s so stereotypical. That’s like the first place someone would look.”

“... Oh.”

Michael led him off the side of the football court, into a slightly wooded area with some sparse trees. There was a slope down into a small area where the trees became a bit more dense before breaking off into a tiny clearing. Jeremy figured that was where the magic happened.

His theory was confirmed when Michael turned to him and said, “You can wait up here. It’ll only be a second.”

Jeremy nodded and whispered an okay, and Michael shot him finger guns before walking down the hill.

Once he was out of sight, Jeremy grew nervous. He knew logically that nothing would happen, but he felt alone and exposed and constantly felt he needed to check behind his back. He didn’t like having Michael so far away.

So… Jeremy supposed it wouldn’t hurt to get just a little bit closer.

Jeremy walked towards the top of the gentle slope, stopping right by a tall tree to hide behind, and cautiously looked down.

It was a surprisingly clear view of Michael, who was turned away from him, which was instantly reassuring. And then right in front of Michael was another figure. It must have been Dustin.

Dustin Kropp wasn’t someone Jeremy had ever talked to, really. But he knew _of_ Dustin. His services were widely talked about throughout the school, and of course, as Michael’s hookup Jeremy was very familiar with the name. If he was honest with himself, Dustin scared Jeremy. He was a drug dealer, which on its own was enough to keep Jeremy away. But then there were the abundance of stories about Dustin around school. Jeremy never tuned into rumors that much, but he’d heard little whispers about Dustin ranging from stupid gossip to claims that he literally murdered his parents. Jeremy doubted it was true, but he had no interest in finding out for sure.

So when Jeremy saw Dustin, he panicked, decided that Michael had everything under control, and quickly ducked behind the tree.

He stayed there, completely still for a minute. His heart was pounding and he was terrified and still...

... Still, Jeremy hadn’t ever witnessed anything like this before. He’d expected trench coats and brick-walled alleyways and flickering streetlights. This seemed surprisingly… low key. And, in a bit of fascination, Jeremy inched out from behind the tree. Not too far, just a tad. Just to watch.

Dustin and Michael were talking. Jeremy saw Michael’s shoulders shake in laughter, which he supposed was a good sign. Then Michael swung his backpack off and set it on the ground, bending down to open and rustle through it for something.

Dustin watched Michael, and though Jeremy couldn’t see his expression that well, he seemed pretty relaxed. Jeremy assumed that this was old news to him and that he didn’t feel the need to be on his guard as much. If Jeremy did this for a living, he knew that he’d be constantly anxious about getting seen by bystanders. But Dustin didn’t seem to mind, even as he was looking at Jeremy.

Oh God. Wait.

_He was looking at Jeremy._

Jeremy froze like a deer in headlights. He knew it would be smart to run or even duck back behind the tree, but he couldn’t move. Michael was still bent over, searching through his bag, and though Jeremy wanted to call out for him his voice was gone. The rumors about Dustin and some sort of murderous background filled Jeremy’s head, and all reason that it absolutely wasn’t true left his mind. Jeremy was surely going to be dead where he stood. This was it for him. Jeremy Heere- found dead at seventeen. And, God save him, the rumors at school- _Ecstasy Kid? Oh yeah, him. That's the one. Dead behind the football field._

And then...

... And then, to his surprise, Dustin raised a hand and… waved at him _._

Which was... out of character for a perpetrator.

Slowly unfreezing and realizing there was no threat, Jeremy blinked dumbly a couple times. How was he supposed to respond to that? Should he respond? Well he had to do _something._

So, physically stuttering, Jeremy slowly raised a hand and waved back jerkily.

He thought he saw Dustin smile, but it was hard to tell from so far away. There wasn’t much time to mull over it, because Michael stood back up, apparently having found what he was looking for, and Dustin’s attention returned back to his customer.

The next few minutes passed quickly as Jeremy processed the fact that he wasn’t dead. Michael handed something to Dustin, Dustin handed something to Michael, and then Michael zipped up his backpack and pulled it back on with some finishing words of some kind. Before Jeremy knew it, Michael was trudging back up the hill.

Jeremy quickly returned to his position at the top of the slope before Michael saw. He wasn’t sure why but he didn’t want Michael to know he’d been watching them.

“Done. Was that so bad?” Michael teased as he walked up to Jeremy, slapping him on the back before heading off towards the football field.

Jeremy looked down the hill one more time to see Dustin heading the opposite way from them. His pace wasn’t brisk, and he took his time as though he didn’t have anywhere to be.

“... I guess not.” Jeremy said, more to himself than Michael, and more than a little mystified.

... Weird.

  



	2. In Which Jeremy Witnesses Several Drug Deals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's nothing weird about this... right? Totally normal. Nothing out of the ordinary here.

Another week came and went. The all nighter had been awesome, and with Apocalypse of the Damned finished Jeremy and Michael found themself in need of a new game, and more weed.

“I’m gonna stop with Dustin after school, but then I’m going to GameStop. If… you wanna come with…” Michael trailed off at the end of a sentence, swirling his straw around in his slushy cup and raising an eyebrow.

Jeremy picked at his lunch and thought it over. One one hand… drug deal. On the other hand… GameStop. And seeing Dustin again. Nothing bad had happened last time he’d witnessed the transaction, and a part of Jeremy found the simplicity of it all amazing. And… Dustin had waved at him. So he didn’t have to worry about Dustin spotting him and getting upset. He didn’t seem to mind.

So, as the lunch bell rang, Jeremy nodded his head and stood up. “Okay. That’s fine.”

Michael gave him a thumbs up, said, “Meet me in the parking lot after school,” and slipped his headphones on before walking away.

* * *

 

Michael led Jeremy to the slope next to the football field one again. Despite knowing for sure he’d be fine now, Jeremy was still anxious.

“I _told_ you you could wait in the car. This is your fault.”

“Yeah, yeah… whatever, just go.” Jeremy blushed a little and shoved Michael towards the slope. Michael rose his hands up in defense and went on his way.

As soon as he was out of sight, Jeremy slipped over to his tree and hid behind it again, curiosity overcoming him. He peeked his head out, but Dustin and Michael had moved a little further away than they had been yesterday, and were obscured by low hanging branches.

Biting his lip, Jeremy considered going closer. He didn’t want Michael spotting him and calling him out, but as long as he was behind Michael… he supposed that he would be fine.

Cautious of the crunchy dead leaves around his feet, Jeremy crept forwards until he found another tree to hide behind. He was in the middle of the incline in the slope now, and Dustin and Michael were closer. Jeremy could hear snippets of conversations and see Dustin’s expressions clearer. Michael was still turned away from him, thankfully, so Jeremy could make it into hiding without being spotted.

Well… without being spotted by Michael, at least.

Dustin caught Jeremy’s gaze briefly, his lips quirking up in a smirk that made Jeremy’s stomach twist. He continued talking to Michael, returning his gaze to his customer as to not blow Jeremy’s cover, and Jeremy was grateful.

After a minute Michael slung off his backpack and leaned down, just like the last time. Dustin’s eyes darted back to Jeremy, and, feeling a little brave, Jeremy waved at him.

He saw Dustin grin and raise a hand, waving back and _winking._ Jeremy’s shoulders hunched instinctively and he felt his face go warm at the gesture. Dustin must’ve noticed his flustered reaction, because he burst out laughing.

Dustin’s laugh was warm and loud and sorta pitchy, and Jeremy’s face turned even redder as his stomach twisted again.

Unfortunately, Dustin had alerted Michael, whose head was swinging around to look at the cause of the outburst. Jeremy had just enough time to duck behind the tree before being spotted, and he held his breath.

He really hoped Dustin would cover for him. A part of him trusted that Dustin would, which was weird considering this was only the second interaction (if it could even be called that) they’d had.

Once his heart had stopped beating so fiercely, he decided it was time to go before he messed anything else up, and he quickly snuck up the hill.

Looking out across the football field, Jeremy felt a little regretful despite the anxiety pooling in his chest. He hadn’t really waved goodbye to Dustin or anything, had just kinda ran away weirdly.

But since when did that matter? He was literally just Michael’s hookup. He and Jeremy had never even talked.

Michael trudged up the hill a few minutes later.

“Let’s get this game!” He yelled with a fist pump.

“What game?”

“The one that we don’t know the name of yet!”

And as Michael drove him to GameStop, Jeremy couldn’t help but think of how Dustin’s first reaction to seeing him wasn’t to panic about being caught as a minor in possession, let alone someone dealing, but to just _wave._ It was so out of character for what Jeremy had heard about him.

So who was Dustin Kropp, really?

* * *

  
This cycle went on every couple weeks. Jeremy and Michael would hurry to the hill just beyond the football field where Michael would do the talking and Jeremy would observe.

A pattern was created in Jeremy’s head: Arrive at the tree. Dustin would spot him and smile. Then talking. Michael would ruffle through his backpack for money, distracted, and Jeremy and Dustin would exchange a wave. More talking. As the deal wrapped up, Jeremy added a final step of waving goodbye to Dustin, which was usually returned with a smile similar to the one he’d receive upon his arrival.

This was the pattern. At times it varied in slight ways, but this tended to be the norm. In example, during the latest visit, as soon as Michael had bent down Dustin had furiously mimed the finger-in-the-hole motion over Michael’s head, and Jeremy had snorted so loudly he’d almost blown his cover.

And as the weeks passed, Jeremy found himself almost looking forward to the visits. His anxiety decreased a little every time as he got used to it, and watching the transaction became a highlight of his week. He wasn’t entirely sure why he enjoyed it so much.

And Michael was none the wiser, though definitely suspicious about why Jeremy was suddenly so keen on tagging along.

Which… Why didn’t he want Michael to know? It’s not like he’d be upset. He’d probably only tease Jeremy about it.

In a way, Jeremy supposed as they once again walked towards the football field on a particularly chilly Friday, it was the whole intimacy of the exchange. Jeremy doubted Dustin wouldn’t do anything of the sort with any of his other customers, not even Michael. The little nods and smiles and waves were for Jeremy and Jeremy only.

But, Jeremy realized, he couldn’t just assume that. He’d literally never talked to Dustin and he didn’t know about his friends or anything.

Still, he doubted that Dustin had anyone else who watched in while he made deals. That was probably only Jeremy. So in a way, those waves had to be just for him, right?

Right?

As they came to the slope of the hill, Jeremy’s face heated up at the realization that he was so hung up over such a silly subject. Since when had he become so possessive over someone he’d never talked to?

Michael trodded down the hill, and Jeremy knew he had a couple minute wait ahead of him just to be safe. Following right behind Michael was risky.

Dustin Kropp. What did he know about Dustin Kropp?

Nothing.

Well, maybe not nothing. Jeremy knew what kind of affect Dustin had on him. Just a wave from him turned Jeremy’s palms sweaty and made him giddy and nervous. And a teasing smirk was enough to make Jeremy a horrid blushing mess and sent his stomach twirling.

Speaking of blushing, Jeremy was definitely doing that as he realized how weirdly romantic that sounded. But that wasn’t the case. He’d never talked to Dustin so it was impossible to feel like that for him, right?

Right?

But then why was he so fascinated with the boy?

Thinking back on his possessive thoughts, Jeremy realized that maybe _that_ was why he always came back. The tiny interactions- the _validation_ that he received. In a school where Jeremy was so obsolete, even after the squip incident, just the little waves, the little glances that said, “hey, I remember you, welcome back,” the _attention_ was what made him so drawn in.

So what if he was an attention whore? At least he could own up to it.

Yep. Nothing weirdly romantic. Just appreciating the attention.

And so, calling that a good conclusion, Jeremy smiled and headed down the hill.

  



	3. In Which Jeremy Makes Some Observations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ... Okay. So maybe this is a little weird.

_ Observations about Dustin Kropp: _

Wait, no, that was creepy. Backtrack.

Okay, in Jeremy’s defense, when you start regularly watching someone-

Wait, no-

When you start regularly listening in on someone’s drug deals-

… Yeah. There really wasn’t any good way to phrase it, Jeremy realized.

Case in point- Jeremy found himself becoming more aware of the whereabouts of Dustin, is all. Dustin sorta fascinated him, so it was only natural that he paid a bit more attention to him.

Anyways.

_ Observations about Dustin Kropp: _

 

#1: Dustin sits with the popular kids.

Typically the stoners sat in the back end of the lunchroom. But Dustin- who Jeremy was pretty sure more than qualified as a stoner- was far away from them.

Jeremy and Michael’s table was near the edge of the commons, right in front of the bathrooms. They had a clear, diagonal view of the popular kids table, right in the center of the lunchroom. And every day, without fail, Dustin sat right next to Chloe Valentine.

He was right at the edge of the table, across from Jenna, and Jeremy could get the perfect line of vision to watch him.

Not that he did that. That was creepy. He just glanced over every once in a while. To observe.

Jeremy could not figure out what he was doing there.

If anything, the rumors about Dustin should’ve kept him away from the popular kids.

Which…

 

#2: Dustin? Murder? Uh…?

Jeremy had admittedly started listening in more on the rare day when Dustin was the topic of conversation among other kids. Just hearing, “Hey, did you hear about Kropp?” was enough to immediately capture his attention.

Jeremy had heard the following about Dustin:

  * Dustin hung around the popular kids (specifically Chloe) just to get in Jake Dillinger’s pants.
  * Dustin once used cocaine instead of baking soda during an eighth grade science experiment (this one was Jeremy’s favorite).
  * Dustin had once replaced the freshman PE teacher’s water bottle with one full of whiskey
  * Dustin had once broken a kids arm.
  * Dustin had once killed a teacher.
  * Dustin had once set Jake Dillinger’s house on fire (given, that statement had immediately been shot down by another kid saying, “No no no, that was Goranski, not Dustin”).
  * Dustin kept a gun in his backpack.
  * Dustin kept a knife in his backpack.
  * Dustin had choked someone in the girl’s bathroom- the third stall was where he did it and it was apparently bad luck to use it.
  * And- by far the most popular rumor- Dustin had killed his parents.



Now- anyone with these kind of rumors surrounding them should have scared people away.

But still Dustin sat with Chloe Valentine and Jenna Rolan.

And still Jeremy observed.

 

#4: Speaking of scaring away- most people avoided Dustin.

Whenever he walked down the hall- people parted like he was a king. This was a similar reaction to when Chloe walked down the hall, except when it was Chloe people tended to stare in awe and whisper and try to steal glances at her ass, whereas with Dustin everyone avoided eye contact and scurried away in silence.

Jeremy and Dustin shared an English class, and their teacher would occasionally let them choose their own seats. Immediately the kids seated around Dustin would book it and he’d sit in the corner alone.

But…

 

#5: Dustin didn’t care.

He walked everywhere with confidence and apathy, even as people scattered from him. He almost reminded Jeremy of Michael in that way- with how he seemed to be unaware of the people around him.

But Jeremy knew that Dustin knew.

When people moved seats away from Dustin in English, he eyed them as they left. So he definitely knew. Jeremy didn’t know how he felt though- his expression was hard to read.

But in the halls it was like traffic parted just for him- and honestly he kind of owned it.

 

#6: Dustin was cool. Like- _really_ cool.

Dustin wore snapbacks and jean jackets and sometimes heelys. Which sounded like a disaster but he made it work. He made it work _really well._

Dustin didn’t walk. He _sauntered._ Or… rolled when he was on heelys. That’s besides the point.

The point was that he sauntered with total confidence wherever he went, taking his time to get wherever he needed to go.

His posture was always relaxed. He didn’t even have a resting face- he was constantly smirking at nothing like he was trying to seduce the fucking _air_ and it was _working._

Every part of him was relaxed, confident, chill. 

Basically, the exact opposite of Jeremy.

But still he waved at Jeremy whenever Jeremy peaked out from behind his tree.

And still Jeremy observed.

 

Those were some observations Jeremy made. The conclusion? He still felt as though he were left with more questions than when he began, and he felt like a stalker.

Further input needed- he decided.

 


	4. In Which Dustin Wears A Leather Jacket (Among Other Things)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god, I'm totally bi...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fuck it I'll proofread this tomorrow sorry for the inevitable spelling errors.
> 
> Anyways- enjoy the extra-long chapter!
> 
> Alternative chapter titles I almost went with:
> 
> \- In Which Michael Catches the Plague  
> \- In Which Jeremy Has A Crush  
> \- In Which Jeremy is totally bi

**** Three weeks before spring break was when things started to get weird.

Or… weirder than they already were. Like a whole new tier of weird.

It all started on Monday. Jeremy was at lunch, everything normal, and the day was going fairly okay. He took a moment to glance over the lunchroom- right to the popular kids table. And…

And Dustin was wearing a leather jacket.

_ And Dustin was wearing a leather jacket. _

Now, Jeremy’s sexuality had been in question for a few months at that point. He knew he liked girls. But honestly? Guys were nice. Kinda _really_ nice.

In example...

Rich? Nice strong arms. Jeremy once saw him effortlessly lift up Jake and suddenly felt the urge to be _held_ those arms. And this boy had been using those arms to push Jeremy into lockers mere months before this started, yet he was still into it! He was also starting to really appreciate Rich’s constant use of loose tank tops, and how sometimes when he stretched the too-big sleeve holes would show off his ribs. 

Jake? Soft looking hair. Jake sat next to Jeremy in trigonometry, and sometimes when he was super focused on a problem he would repeatedly run his hand through his hair. Jeremy would find himself lost in a trance as he stared at the almost rhythmic movement of Jake’s hair falling in front of his eyes, before being smoothed back, before falling back down again. Jeremy actually caught himself lifting his hand up to touch it once, as if the urge was beyond his control.

And Michael? Well, Michael was Michael. He wasn’t ugly by any means- quite a nice looking guy, actually. It was just that nothing about him was as physically prominent to Jeremy as with Rich and Jake. But sometimes when they were playing video games, Jeremy would glance over and see the light of the television glinting in Michael’s glasses- illuminating his face. He would bite his lip and furrow his brow in total concentration, and Jeremy’s stomach would summersault at the sight.

So whether or not he was completely straight had been on his mind for a while.

And then Dustin happened.

And Dustin was wearing a leather jacket.

Michael was going on about how unfairly his english teacher had graded his essay. Jeremy stopped listening as soon as he saw Dustin.

He didn’t know exactly what made the leather jacket up the sex appeal so much, but it was working wonders on Jeremy. Maybe it was the way Dustin was just super casually leaning forward with his hand cupping his face, as if he had better things to do like ride his motorcycle around town (did Dustin have a motorcycle? The leather jacket made it seem to Jeremy like he did), that left Jeremy feeling like he was running behind begging for a ride while Dustin left him in the dust(in).

Maybe it was the way that his lips were wrapped around a straw (was that a Starbucks cup?) that sent Jeremy’s mind to absolutely obscene places.

Maybe it was because he’d taken his snapback off for once so Jeremy could see his tousled hair that Jeremy wanted to smooth back into place.

Maybe it was just the jacket. Just the jacket that framed his shoulders- oh God his _shoulders_ \- really perfectly and amped the badboy vibe up to two-thousand.

Maybe it was a mix of all of those things.

Whatever it was, Jeremy realized at that moment that he was definitely not straight.

“Hey, are you even listening?”   
  
Jeremy’s head snapped back to Michael. “What?”   
  
Michael rolled his eyes. “Rude.”   
  
“I- sorry- I didn’t mean to! I just…” Jeremy glanced back over to Dustin.

_ Mistake. _

Dustin was stretching his arms over his head, causing the jacket and hem of his shirt to ride up. The tiny slip of stomach showing sent Jeremy’s mind spiraling in several directions- none of them even slightly PG. he snapped out of it and desperately tried to remember what he’d been saying. 404 not found.

“Uh oh. Oh no no no,” Michael said with growing urgency.

Jeremy tore his eyes away. “What?”

Michael crossed his arms, brow furrowed. “I know that look.”

“Uh- what look?”

“The one you get when you’re giving Christine puppy love eyes.”

“What!?”

“Look, she told you she isn’t interested. You really gotta respect that-“

Jeremy felt his face flush. “Wh- it’s not _her!_ “ He caught his mistake when Michael raised an eyebrow. “Uh- I mean- it isn’t anyone! You’re making stuff up, dude.”

Because really, okay. Dustin was hot and Jeremy realized that these feelings he were having for guys was not just a platonic straight thing. He was definitely gay to some degree. Fine. Okay. He’d been suspecting that for a while. But just because Dustin was the nail in the coffin didn’t mean that Jeremy _liked_ him, right?

Right?

Michael just shook his head. “Right. Okay. You keep telling yourself that dude.”

Jeremy stared down at the table. He felt an urge to look back at Dustin again, just a glance, but he killed it.

He did not like Dustin Kropp.

 

 

On Tuesday Dustin wore a crop top.

It was the kind of crop top Jeremy had only seen fuckboys on Instagram- and James Charles- wear. The kind that Jeremy instinctively groaned and scowled at because _ew._

But there was just… one thing.

Dustin actually looked good in it. Dustin looked _very_ good in it.

Jeremy didn’t know how a teacher hadn’t dress coded him on it, but given the kinds of things Chloe Valentine could get away with, maybe the staff just didn’t care.

Or maybe the staff was scared because Dustin had actually killed a teacher before.

But that was what was fun about Dustin, Jeremy thought. He was a mystery. Jeremy had never talked to him; had no way to find out whether or not the rumors were true. And a part of him wanted to talk to Dustin and get to know him, but another part of him enjoyed the mystery and wanted to preserve it.

... That was only partly true. He mainly told himself that when the real reason was a) he was scared of Dustin, and b) he was scared of seeming like an idiot in front of Dustin.

Anyways. Crop top.

If Jeremy had nearly fainted at seeing just a tiny bit of Dustin’s stomach the day before, then he completely died when Dustin wore a crop top.

See- Dustin had abs.

He noticed that in English right before lunch when Dustin passed by his desk. What Jeremy didn’t know that Dustin’s abs were literal magnets whose negative side was directed straight at Jeremy’s positive ones. Those being his eyes.

Jeremy couldn’t tell anyone anything he learned in English that day. He couldn’t remember. He forgot he was even at school at one point.

Those magnets kept his eyes trained all throughout lunch. Eventually Michael gave up making conversation with him and instead just stared over his shoulder.

“Who is it?”

“Nobody.”

“Uh huh. Tell me.”

Jeremy rolled his eyes. “Look, can’t I just… can’t I just _appreciate_ how someone looks without- like, liking them?”

“Oh, of course you can.”

Jeremy sighed in exasperation. “There. See?”

“But whoever you’re looking at, you’re looking at with more than ‘appreciation,’ dude. I know you too well.”

Jeremy hated hearing this because usually Michael was right about these sorts of things.

But Jeremy knew that no- there was no way he had a crush on someone who was a possible murderer, a definite drug dealer, and someone he hadn’t even _talked to_.

“Popular kids?” Michael pressed, noticing the direction of his gaze, “Is it Brooke?”

Brooke wasn’t bad at all. Brooke was a very sweet girl, and very pretty. But, “No.”

“... Jenna?”

Jeremy had only really talked to Jenna once, and that was when he was giving her a life ruining tic tac. “No.”

Michael hesitated for a long moment. “... Chloe?”

_No_. “No! God no! No!”

Michael raised his hands in surrender. “Okay! Okay. Just checking all my options.”

Jeremy was about to point out that Jake and Rich and Dustin were still options, but remembered that Michael wasn’t aware of his sexuality crisis.

… Maybe he’d tell him tomorrow.

“Whoever it is, you better not do anything stupid to get with them.”

The way Michael said it was teasing, but Jeremy sensed the real concern underneath. He turned to Michael and shook his head.

“No. I promise not. Never again.”

Michael visibly relaxed.

Then Jeremy added. “Especially because there is no crush and I don’t like anyone.”

Michael stuck his tongue out at Jeremy and threw his empty slushy cup at him. “You may be a dumbass, Heere, but you can’t deny the truth forever!”

 

 

On Wednesday Dustin wore glasses.

When Jeremy saw him with them on in English, and his heart slowed.

He knew Dustin was hot, but he never imagined him pulling off such an… innocent? Mature? Harmless? Different look.

It wasn’t even that he was wearing anything else special- just a normal flannel with some sort of sonic shirt underneath. Snapback on his head. Nothing out of the ordinary except for the glasses.

Just something about them made Dustin seem less untouchable and more normal.

Dare Jeremys say- cute.

Jeremy kept staring at his face all throughout English. He even decided he’d say hi to Dustin after class.

He did not say hi to Dustin after class.

****  
  
  


His stupid glasses distracted Jeremy all throughout lunch. Michael hadn’t even initiated a conversation.

“If she notices you she’s gonna think you’re weird,” Michael mumbled.

“Huh?”

“The girl you have a crush on.”

Right. Michael didn’t know. And Jeremy had told myself he would tell Michael today.

Internally, he panicked. Liking guys wasn’t normal- his brain was hardwired to think that. Jeremy wasn’t entirely looking to seem more different and weird than he actually was.

But then again… This was Michael. Michael who was very gay. Michael who- even if he wasn’t gay- would more than likely support Jeremy no matter what.

So Jeremy cleared his throat and quietly said, “Um… Michael?”

“Yeah?”

Jeremy bit his lip and stared across the room to Dustin, who had a giant dorky grin on his face. Jeremy felt himself smile a little despite the butterflies in his stomach.

“What is it, Jer?”

Jeremy turned back to Michael, his voice quiet and meek. “Um… what if I… like boys?”

It took Michael a minute to get it.

“Like… sexually?”

“Um…. yeah.”

Michael stared at him. Jeremy shifted in his seat.

“Ha. Gay.”

Jeremy laughed uneasily. Michael thought he was joking. He didn’t try to correct him.

Michael saw through it. “... Are you being serious?”

Jeremy gave a tiny nod.

“... Oh no.”

Jeremy’s head snapped up to him. Oh no was correct. What was that supposed to mean?

“I- sorry- I didn’t-“ He started.

“You’re gonna steal all the guys from me.”

Jeremy relaxed and sighed, “I fucking hate you.” He smacked Michael on the head.

“Ow-“ Michael winced and laughed.

Jeremy rolled his eyes, but he felt relieved. Michael was supportive. Michael was good. Michael was Michael.

Michael… looked like he was legitimately in pain.

His head was now down on the table. Jeremy noticed that he hadn’t even touched his slushie, which was melting and condensing down the sides. A bad sign.

“Uh, are you okay dude?” Jeremy asked.

“... I feel like I’m gonna throw up.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yeah. My head hurts. It’s been like this since last hour.”

Jeremy frowned in concern. “... Do you want me to take you to the office.”

“Please.”

Michael slowly stood up. Jeremy grabbed his tray to throw out and started to walk through the commons. 

“... Mr. Heere,” Michael started with a weak smile.

“No.”

“I don’t feel so good.”

Jeremy smacked him again.

As he was walking out of the lunchroom, he stole one last glance back at Dustin and his dorky glasses. Cute.

But not someone Jeremy would date.

 

 

On Thursday Jeremy found out Michael had the flu.

It was pretty bad. He was gonna be out of commission for a couple days. He’d leave his Nintendo switch to Jeremy in his will. Those three sentences were all that he texted to Jeremy in the morning.

The day was boring without Michael, and if Jeremy wasn't distracted he’d be sure he looked especially stupid sitting alone at lunch. But thankfully, his focus was elsewhere.

Jeremy’s Dustin-watching habits had increased tenfold ever since the leather jacket incident. He’d spent every day at lunch and in English that week doing almost nothing but staring at Dustin. He figured it was because of his newfound appreciation for his sexuality and Dustin’s very nice wardrobe.

The catch- today Dustin was back to normal. No special clothes. No sexy jacket or crop top or cute glasses. Nothing.

But Jeremy still spent all of lunch staring at him.

His mind became clouded with Dustin and only Dustin. All the swarming thoughts and questions still unanswered. The boy who seemed just a tad out of reach.

Still, he could admire. Dustin was leaning forward on his elbows while Jenna whispered something to him across the table. He had a smile on his face that Jeremy wished would be directed to him.

Chloe Valentine, next to Dustin, leaned down and murmured something to him.

Jeremy swore he saw her eyes dart up to him. His breath caught.

Dustin turned to her. Oh no.

A few moments of talking. Jeremy swallowed and told himself to go to the bathroom but he couldn’t tear his eyes away.

And then Dustin was looking at him. Smiling at him, just as Jeremy had hoped would happen.

And then Dustin raised his hand and waved at him.

Jeremy was at a loss. He screamed at himself internally to wave back. They’d practiced this trick before- Dustin waved and Jeremy waved back. Yet somehow the command was lost to him.

This was unfamiliar territory. This wasn’t the side of the football field. This was lunch with people and Chloe Valentine staring over Dustin’s shoulder. This wasn’t normal.

No- wait.

This was the butterflies rapidly being set off in Jeremy’s stomach. This was the way he felt his face going red and his hands clamming up. This was the way his breath was just gone. Escaped. This was how the room had seemingly gone silent. This was the way that- despite the people surrounding him and Chloe Valentine watching- Jeremy felt like he and Dustin were the only two people in the room seeing each other. Connecting.

This was rapidly feeling more and more like how he’d felt when he’d had a crush on Christine and it had been just the two of them sitting in the school auditorium before the first rehearsal of Midsummer’s had started.

This was the way Dustin’s air-seducing smirk was now trained at _him,_ of all people.

This was Michael sneering, "I told you so," inside his head.

This was Jeremy getting a crush.

Oh no.

Dustin’s smile was faltering at the lack of response. He was pivoting himself to turn away from Jeremy.

The game resumed. Jeremy pressed B and thumbed the analog stick left and right, waving back at Dustin.

Dustin smiled again, holding his gaze for a moment more before turning away for real.

The gaze broke and the world came back. The sounds of the cafeteria crashed back in and Chloe Valentine shot him an unreadable look before getting caught up in a different conversation.

Jeremy felt his heart racing and his breathing resumed. Oh no.

… So maybe he had a crush on Dustin.


	5. In Which the Silence is Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh my God- he is touching my hand- oh my God-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternatively titled: The chapter I've wanted to write ever since I started this damn thing
> 
> Alternatively titled: In which Dustin recites Shakespeare
> 
> Alternatively titled: 2000 words of Jeremy being scared

Michael was still sick on Friday, which sucked because Jeremy didn’t have anyone to freak out to in person, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to admit to Michael over text that he’d been stalking his drug deals.

Dustin Kropp stayed on Jeremy’s mind as he fell asleep the night prior and greeted him again as he woke up. Dustin stayed there throughout Jeremy’s first three periods into English, where he finally left because Jeremy could then actually stare at Dustin in person. This continued through lunch, where Dustin waved to him again as he did Thursday. Thoughts of Dustin returned for the rest of the school day right until the bell rung.

So basically, it was the most anxiety riddled day of Jeremy’s life.

This crush was absolutely not okay, in his eyes. He and Dustin had never talked. He knew nothing about Dustin, even though he liked to think his thorough observations helped him get a read on his behavior. But truly, Dustin could be an asshole or a murderer or worse and Jeremy had no idea. Hell, they met through a _drug deal._

He forgot about Michael not being at school because he was so distracted- unusual since his entire day usually circulated around Michael being there. He was so engrossed in his own little bubble that he hardly payed attention to anything or the people around him, yet whenever Dustin was nearby Jeremy’s eyes found him easily- even if in a giant crowd. Jeremy felt like he’d had a radar installed that only picked up on the location of really sexy stoners.

Jeremy forgot all about Michael not being at school, yet of course he remembered it was Friday- days where he got to see Dustin in action. So at the end of the day Jeremy found himself walking through the football field and down the wooded hill. It wasn’t until he was behind his usual tree that Jeremy realized that Michael wasn’t there to make a deal with Dustin.

But Dustin was there. With a guy from the football team.

Who- thank God- was facing away from Jeremy.

Still, Jeremy froze completely in panic. He knew Dustin wouldn’t care, but it had always been with Michael. If Michael happened to turn around and catch Jeremy- fine, okay. He’d have explaining to do but it was no big deal.

But this was a big scary varsity kid who, if he saw Jeremy, wouldn’t hesitate to pound him to the floor and then leave him in a locker to starve.

Dustin noticed Jeremy as the guy turned away for a moment, waving to him with a smile. Jeremy was too petrified to respond. It took Dustin a moment to realize what was wrong, and when he did his eyes widened.

Jeremy snapped out of it long enough to fully hide behind the tree with his back to the scene. He stopped breathing, afraid that it would be too loud. Every sense focused on the sounds and voices coming from just a little farther down the hill.

One unfamiliar voice spoke up. “Thanks.”

Another responded, “No problem. See you later?” Jeremy hadn’t really ever paid attention to what Dustin’s voice sounded like (probably because they’d never _talked_ ) but the laidback tone immediately indicated that it was him

The unfamiliar one- football guy- hummed an affirmation. Jeremy felt his heart stop as the crunching of feet on leaves sounded, starting to get near as the guy walked up the hill, closer and closer to Jeremy’s tree-

But then Dustin yelled, “Hey- Mason, wait!”

The footsteps paused. “Yeah?”

A pause. Jeremy started trembling and prayed that his knees wouldn’t give out.

“... The football and soccer coach were up there earlier. They probably left but you should probably be careful.”

Jeremy’s thoughts spiraled despite the situation.

_Oh my God, is he covering for me?_

“Oh, really?” Football guy- apparently Mason- asked.

“Yeah, you might wanna head this way.” There was a pause, probably Dustin gesturing.

_Oh my God he’s covering for me. Oh my God oh my God._

“Oh, cool, thanks.”

The footsteps headed in the other direction, away from the tree, until they were entirely gone.

Jeremy let himself breathe, trembling and sinking down to the ground. He pulled his knees up to his chest and kept his back to the tree. Never doing that again, he quickly decided.

Then- after a moment:

“O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?”

Jeremy hadn’t really gotten the chance to appreciate Dustin’s voice in his panic. But it was a nice voice- a little raspy but still warm and nice

Wait.

“Deny thy father and refuse thy name. Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love and I’ll no longer be a Capulet.”

Was- wait. Wait. Was Dustin talking to _him?_

The crunch of footsteps started up again towards Jeremy’s tree.

No- he couldn’t be talking to Jeremy. No way.

But Mason just left. There was nobody else there. _Oh my God-_

“‘Tis but thy name that is my enemy: Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.”

Dustin Kropp was reciting Shakespeare. To him- Jeremy Heere. In the woods on a breezy afternoon. _Oh my God._

“What’s Montague? It is nor hand nor foot nor arm nor face nor any other part belonging to a man.”

Jeremy could practically hear the smirk in his tone. Shakespeare had absolutely no right to sound as sexual as it did when Dustin said it.

“O be some other name.”

Dustin’s voice was getting very close. Jeremy realized what was about to go down. He was about to meet his crush.  _Oh my god._

“What’s in a name?”  
  
Jeremy straightened his back as the voice got closer still. His crush was reciting a Shakespeare play to him as a role of a love interest and he was about to meet Dustin and Jeremy was so lame compared to him and this wasn’t happening-

“That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet…”

The crunching stopped. Dustin’s voice was directly behind Jeremy now. He had to have been behind the tree now, opposite of Jeremy. Jeremy felt like he was at the tipping point at the rollercoaster and found it unfair that he hadn’t had more time to prepare at the incline.

“So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d... “

A hand appeared to the right side of Jeremy’s face. The rollercoaster veering vertically downwards, Jeremy turned his head towards the source.

Dustin was smiling, eyes squinty as he held out a hand to Jeremy. The sun streaming through the trees shined down on him and Jeremy’s breath caught in his throat. Dustin must have taken in his stupefied expression because he had to pause to laugh for a moment before he continued talking, and Jeremy… was definitely, to some degree, in love.

“Retain that dear perfection which he owes without that title,” Dustin continued through a chuckle.

Jeremy looked down to Dustin’s hand, still outstretched for him. He stared at in, physically too scared to move.

The last time he’d talked to his crush, he’d had a robot in his head and that had ended horrifically. Christine had turned him down, and while he was trying to work on the whole “be yourself” thing, this was _Dustin_ who would not be impressed with whatever stupid thing inevitably came out of Jeremy’s mouth.

So Jeremy didn’t move. Didn’t respond. Just stared at Dustin’s hand. Which was awkward, but Jeremy was too scared to move even though he really did _want to..._

Dustin, of course, was clearly noticing the hesitance. His smile faltered and he started pulling his hand back.

_Wait- no-_

Jeremy regained enough control over himself to start slowly moving his hand up towards Dustin’s, hovering over his palm.

He glanced back up at Dustin, hesitating. Dustin returned with a soft smile that was far too reassuring for somebody who had been selling weed less than a minute ago.

Jeremy finally set his hand in Dustin’s- _he is touching my hand_ \- allowing Dustin to fully grab him and pull him to his feet.

“Uh, hey.”

The first thing Jeremy noticed was that… Dustin was shorter than him. Which Jeremy would’ve laughed at if he wasn’t terrified. He supposed Dustin always just seemed taller and more intimidating from far away.

The second thing Jeremy noticed was that his own tongue was made of lead, refusing to let him respond. Silence grew heavy in the air between them. What was he supposed to say that wouldn’t immediately tip Dustin off?

Dustin shifted uncomfortably and let go of Jeremy’s hand. How long had he been holding his hand, anyways? Jeremy wished he’d been paying more attention.

“You don’t talk much, do you?”

Though Dustin’s tone wasn’t accusing, Jeremy still felt guilty. Now Dustin thought he was weird. All he had to do was say hello.

Jeremy knew he needed to say something quickly, but just… What? Now it was too late for hello and Jeremy had no idea how to remedy the situation.

Dustin was frowning for sure at that point. All Jeremy could do was look down at him wide-eyed.

Dustin looked away, crossing his arms over his chest. His eyes (brown… pretty) darted between Jeremy and the grass a couple times.

“You’re kinda leaving me hanging, Freckles,” Dustin laughed. It was obviously forced and nervous. But also- _Freckles._ Oh no.

Jeremy was experiencing a full on war in his head over what and what not to say. The result was a white noise that left him staring at Dustin as if he were completely alien. This was a disaster.

Dustin cleared his throat. His voice went soft as he asked, “... Are you scared of me?”

Was he?  
  
Setting the rumors that would terrify anyone aside- because honestly Jeremy didn’t believe or care about any of those- was he terrified of Dustin? He knew he was terrified in that moment. He knew he was terrified of talking to Dustin at school. He was terrified of running into Dustin in the hall or Dustin catching him staring at lunch.

But… Was that really being scared of Dustin?

No, it wasn’t, Jeremy realized. Jeremy was scared of _himself_ because he was afraid of messing up like he was now.

So was Jeremy scared? Yes. Of Dustin? Hell no.

He wished he could convey that.

Thankfully, there were nonverbal alternatives to yes and no. If Jeremy could grab Dustin’s hand, surely he could move his head.

So Jeremy managed to- just barely- shake his head no.

“... Really?”

Jeremy nodded, a little more confidently.

That seemed to wash away a couple of Dustin’s nerves. He cocked his head to the side. “But you don’t talk.”

Jeremy sucked in a breath and shrugged. Oh good, he was regaining control of his body. If only his mouth would start working.

A bit more silence. Jeremy still drew a blank.

“Um,” Dustin said after a minute. He was clearly unequipped to dealing with people like this and Jeremy’s stomach twisted in guilt. “Do you want me to walk you back to your car?”

So Dustin thought he was pathetic and couldn’t walk himself back to his own car. Great.

But was Jeremy going to turn down being walked back by a willing hot guy? No.

Jeremy nodded his head yes at last and Dustin forced another smile and a, “Cool,” and they started walking back up the hill.

Jeremy realized too late that he’d basically signed himself up for another two minutes of awkwardness. Not only that, but he didn’t even have a car. Michael was his ride home and Michael wasn’t there that day.

Fine. Okay, cool. He could lie.

Which, speaking of Michael-

“Hey,” Dustin started again, smirking, “if you’re really so desperate to see me without your friend tagging along, all you have to do is say hi, Freckles.”  
  
Jeremy’s brain started analyzing from several angles. Dustin didn’t seem mad, so that was good. But also he thought Jeremy was desperate. Great. But also- Jeremy was the one tagging along all those times. Not the other way around. Jeremy’s stomach somersaulted. Wait- did that mean that Dustin seeing Michael as the tag along mean that he’d really been _that_ focused on Jeremy the whole time, or was he overanalyzing? Oh my God _Freckles-_

Dustin laughed loudly, breaking into his thoughts. “You should see your face right now.”

Jeremy opened his mouth to retort, but realized he didn’t have a response to begin with, and closed his mouth slowly.

He realized he should probably thank Dustin for saving his ass a few minutes back, but his mouth still refused to work.

The walk across the football field was silent. Every minute or so Jeremy would glance down at Dustin, who was staring straight ahead with an absent minded smile on his face.

Jeremy was pretty sure that the image of Dustin holding a hand out to him while he sat huddled by a tree was going to be burned into his mind for weeks, and he felt his cheeks go hot.

And on top of it all, Dustin had the audacity to recite _Romeo and Juliet_ to him, the madman-

Jeremy figured out what he had to say.

The catch was that he couldn’t remember it.

There was a final slope up the hill towards the parking lot. They neared it, passing the bleachers. Nobody was making out under it- an unusual occurrence.

_How the fuck does it end?_

They started up the hill.

_We read it earlier this year..._

Jeremy’s mind swarmed, he glanced down at Dustin once more, who was unaware to Jeremy’s internal panic.

_Christine recited it for you like eight times. You’ve got this. How did it go?_

They reached the top of the hill. A sea of cars greeted them and Dustin turned to him.

“This is your stop.”  
  
Jeremy remembered.

Dustin looked at him expectantly. Catching stage fright, Jeremy stared down at Dustin’s chest rather than his eyes. He managed to open his mouth and start whispering hoarsely.

“Romeo, doff thy name…”  
  
Dustin visibly straightened up, Jeremy dared to let his eyes travel up a little further. He cleared his throat and spoke a little louder.

“And for that name, which is no part of thee…”

He finally looked to Dustin’s eyes, which were now finally widening in recognition. Gathering a burst of confidence, Jeremy finished earnestly.

“Take all myself.”

Dustin broke out in a gigantic grin that made the past five minutes of torture completely worth it. Jeremy nearly took a bow to the imaginary crowd in his head.

Dustin started laughing, eyes squinting again. And Dustin’s laugh was just very contagious, and Jeremy was melting away leftover adrenaline from the stress of talking to him and nearly getting caught looking in on a fucking drug deal. So Jeremy started laughing with him.

Because that’s how it always seemed to work between them.

Dustin waved. Jeremy waved back.

Dustin smiled. Jeremy smiled back.

Dustin laughed. Jeremy laughed back.

Dustin spoke. Jeremy spoke back.

And the silence was broken.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh I could end it here. Like don't say that wouldn't be a satisfactory ending. 
> 
> But no dw there's more. I've signed myself up for hell thus far, might as well go all the way. We've only just gotten started after all!! :DDDDD


	6. In Which Jeremy Gets A Boner From A Fantasy During A Lunch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh God... Is he walking over here?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3 Things
> 
> 1st, excuse for my absence. The past 4 weeks have gone like this:  
> \- Tech week/performance week for a play I was in  
> -Exam prep week  
> -Exam week  
> -Getting my wisdom teeth out
> 
> But now it's summer and I'll pick up my slack I promise
> 
> 2nd, Michael isn't dead I swear. He'll be back in a chapter or two
> 
> 3rd, this is another chapter I've wanted to write for this thing since I started it, so I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

By Monday Michael was still cursed with the plague. Yet again Jeremy was doomed to spend the day alone. 

On the bright side, Jeremy had relaxed enough so that he wasn’t constantly replaying Friday’s events.

Jeremy and Dustin’s meeting had concluded quickly with a “See you later,” and a suttered, “Uh, yeah.” Jeremy had walked home, crashed on his bed, and screamed into his pillow like a giddy pre-teen girl.

The fact that he was screwed over for a drug dealer plagued his mind over the weekend. That paired with the image of Dustin smiling down at him with an outstretched hand. And the sound of Dustin’s voice reciting Shakespeare. And Dustin touching his hand. And-

Dustin waved to Jeremy in English on Monday. Jeremy waved back just as he realized that the course of their relationship had changed. Were they friends now? Was Jeremy supposed to approach Dustin? Were they on speaking terms or a first name basis?

At lunch he sat alone again, picking at his fries like a bird (which Jeremy practically was). His head was swarming and he wished more than ever that Michael was present to distract him with a tirade on a documentary or something. Anything was better than thinking about Dustin, yet at the same time he never wanted his mind elsewhere. Because while Dustin was terrifying, Dustin was also _great_ fantasy material.

Given, Jeremy was doing his best with the little references he had.

Not in the sexual department. He was stocked there.

But replaying Friday’s events, he took bits and pieces away. Manipulated and switched through scenarios from the source. Which more often than not turned into the events going roughly the same but with less of Jeremy fucking up.

For example; In Jeremy’s fantasy, Dustin was smiling down at him, dappled in sunlight that peaked through the leaves in the trees above them. He laughed, at Jeremy’s flustered reaction, a warm sound, as he held out a hand.

(As it is probably apparent by now, that moment was the highlight of Jeremy’s experience with the shady drug dealer and tended to be his go-to fantasy jumping-off point.)

Jeremy didn’t hesitate this time. He confidently took Dustin’s hand and stood up, finishing off the sonnet immediately to Dustin’s surprise and delight. Dustin would smile up at him without letting go of his hand.

“Hey Jeremy,” He’d say in his sexy sexy voice.

And Jeremy would melt because _yes_. Their first real interaction! Words directed at him! From Dustin Kropp!

But Jeremy would keep calm and smoothly say, “Hey Dustin. Funny meeting you here.”

Dustin would laugh and play along. He’d gesture to the forest around them. “I feel like I’ve seen you in this part of town before.”   
  
And without stuttering once Jeremy would say, “I frequent. I like to people watch.”   
  
Dustin would cross his arms, shifting his weight, but like, sexily. “Oh yeah? What have you observed?”   
  
And _then_ Jeremy would say, “Well there’s this boy.”   
  
“Yeah?”   


“He wears leather jackets and crop tops and can’t go through a single drug deal without laughing.”   
  
“He sounds like a psychopath.”   
  
“I know, but get this- he’s got a really sexy voice and really sexy abs and really pretty eyes. Even though he’s like, really shady, he seems really nice and genuine.”   
  
Dustin would laugh and cock his head. “And?”   
  
“And,” The moment of truth. Jeremy took in a deep breath. “I really like him.”

Dustin’s eyes would light up in pleasant surprise and he would smile. But then his gaze would go dangerously dark in a way that made Jeremy’s stomach lurch in the best way possible, and he’d ask, “But is he a good kisser?”   
  
And Jeremy would say, “I’ve yet to find that out.”   
  
And Dustin would say, “Maybe now would be a good time to figure that out.”   
  
And Jeremy would say, “Good idea,” As he slowly leaned in. And Dustin would smirk and lean in too.

Their lips would touch. It would be a good kiss. Jeremy just summed it up to that because he didn’t have a lot of experience in that department.

But _then._

Then Dustin would trail his hands down to Jeremy’s hips and shove him backwards. Jeremy’s back would hit the trunk of a tree and he’d hardly have time to breathe before Dustin would press against him, kissing him again. Lips were exploring his neck, Dustin’s hands were trailing lower, down to the front of his jeans-

A whoop from a varsity kid made Jeremy’s eyes snap open with a loud yelp. He bolted upright, looking through the trees for had whoever had found them. Nobody had. He wasn’t even in the woods. It was lunch and he was alone at his table. Dustin wasn’t in sight. He’d been fantasizing.

God, he was hopeless.

Jeremy slouched and ran a hand over his face, trying to wake himself up from the scenario. Peeking through his fingers, he scanned the room to see if anyone had seen him. Thankfully, nobody had noticed how he was behaving.

Except Dustin. No, wait- except _everyone_ at the popular kids table.

Jeremy sat up straight again in a panic. He was currently being stared down by the six most influential people at his school. Unfortunately, from so far away, he couldn’t tell if it was like archaeologists looking at a long lost artifact, or wolves licking their lips at a deer. He feared it was the latter.

Needing to somehow diffuse the situation, Jeremy took the initiative to wave to Dustin.

Dustin didn’t wave back.

Jeremy felt his stomach drop.

Wait.

Dustin stood up.

Jeremy felt his stomach skyrocket into orbit.

Most people were still absorbed in whatever was going on at their own little lunch tables, but it felt again to Jeremy as if the world were hyperfocused on just him and Dustin.

Especially when Dustin started to walk towards his table.

Panic levels rose. The popular group was still watching them.

Jeremy reasoned in his head that Dustin would soon change direction or something. Perhaps he was going to the bathroom.

When he was halfway towards Jeremy’s table, eyes still fixed on him, Jeremy abandoned that hope.

Jeremy frantically readjusted the sleeves of his cardigan and tried to avert his eyes.

Two tables away.

There was not going to be a confrontation in the lunchroom on a Monday, Jeremy decided. He turned his entire body away from the scene, praying that would make it stop.

Breathing heavily, still as a statue, staring down at his fries, Jeremy noticed a figure enter his peripheral vision.

A lunch tray was placed to the left of him on the table.

Someone sat down two seats away from him.

Jeremy closed his eyes.

_ Go away go away go away. _

“Hey.”

Well.

Jeremy opened his eyes and turned slowly, ever so slowly.

Dustin Kropp was addressing _him._

Dustin Kropp was sitting at _his_ table.

Jeremy was not okay.

Thankfully, confusion outweighed mortification.

Well, somewhat thankfully.

It saved him in that, rather than being silent for five minutes and repeating Friday’s events, he actually said something. It ruined him in that he didn’t say anything remotely normal such as, “hey,” or, “what’s up,” or, “did you know that humanity has stopped evolving?”

Instead, all Jeremy said was, “What are you doing here?”

Jeremy realized what he’d just asked a fraction of a second later, and mortification fully took residence.

Dustin was fixing him with a bewildered, though slightly amused look. He sighed and shrugged in an overexaggerated manner, reaching to grab his tray and stand up. “Well, if you want me to go-”

“No!” Jeremy blurted far too quickly, “I mean, uh, you can- you can stay.” He gestured in a direction that could vaguely be considered towards the table but looked instead like a strange spasm.

Dustin smiled and shifted in his seat to get comfortable. “He talks!” he mused to himself under his breath, and Jeremy’s face went red.

Still, Jeremy couldn’t help but stare at Dustin in slight awe. The fact that he was sitting at Jeremy’s table- Jeremy’s!- instead of anywhere else in the commons was a 1 in 70 chance and it seemed like a phenomenon. Come one, come all, Jeremy Heere had captured and caged a popular kid. A _hot_ one, at that!

After getting situated, Dustin looked up at jeremy for a beat, then smirked. A two hit KO that reminded Jeremy how absolutely screwed he was. Images from his fantasy reeled through his head, and he tried to cross his legs as subtly as possible.

“Um,” Jeremy said, trying to distract himself, “I… Not to be like, um, rude, but why _are_ you here?”

Dustin’s eyes twinkled in amusement and Jeremy realized he’d made a horrible mistake.

“Well for one... not to be like, um, rude,” Dustin mimicked, making Jeremy burn with shame, “but you look really fucking pathetic sitting here all by yourself.”

Jeremy resisted the urge to crawl under the table and cry. His crush seeing him as pathetic didn’t exactly feel like a self esteem booster.

But then Dustin said, “Also because I couldn’t help but notice that you were staring, and I thought you might appreciate a closer look.”

Oh _no._

Jeremy made a strangled sound and tried to come up with an excuse, but all that came out were mangled stutters.

Dustin laughed loudly, which would’ve melted Jeremy’s heart if Jeremy wasn’t dying, and quickly tried to reassure him. “Freckles, if I was offended I wouldn’t be here right now.”

'That _was supposed to clear the air!?'_ Jeremy asked God as his soul entered a new mortal plane.

“I, uh-” Jeremy attempted.

Dustin chuckled softly, going silent to supposedly give Jeremy a break, but contradicting with the way his eyes raked up Jeremy’s body. Jeremy crossed his legs tighter.

“Well?” Dustin asked after a moment.

“Well… well what?”   
  
Dustin gestured to himself. “What do you think?”   
  
“What do I what?” Jeremy stared at the test he didn’t study for as it mocked him with sexiness. This was worse than Friday by a long shot.

“You’ve been staring at me for a reason. What do you think of me?”   
  
It occurred to Jeremy that this could very likely mean Dustin had been aware of Jeremy’s staring habits for a while. He didn’t entertain the thought in fear that his body would combust.

Jeremy tried to instead figure out what sort of answer Dustin wanted from him. The obvious one would be, “you look sexy,” but that sentence brought back painful memories, and he didn't have a robot wingman to give him confidence to say it.

Instead Jeremy murmured, “You’re… interesting.”   
  
Dustin cocked an eyebrow. “‘Interesting?’ Not amazing, or sexy?”   
  
There it was. Jeremy waved his hands, “No! No, you are! You are sexy!”

Realizing what he’d said, Jeremy slapped a hand over his mouth. Dustin was laughing again.

“Well thank you,” he said, “Gotta say, interesting is a new one. Interesting how?”   
  
After a moment of desperately tracking his thoughts and trying to calm down, Jeremy slowly let his hand fall and closed his eyes. It was easier not to see him.

“You’re… You're a mystery. Nobody knows anything about you, but everyone knows you.” That answer felt honest, and didn’t reveal that Jeremy had been borderline stalking him.

There was an unusual silence following the explanation. Jeremy figured it wasn’t the answer Dustin had been expecting, but he wasn’t being reassured by the lack of comment. Worried he’d be met with a horrified glare, Jeremy peeked an eye open.

Dustin didn’t look offended at all. He was studying Jeremy closely, face relaxed. The overbearing act was gone. Jeremy blinked open both eyes in surprise and Dustin looked up, meeting Jeremy’s gaze softly. 

This was... different.

Dustin slowly leaned forward, shaking his head in near wonder, and quietly asked, “What’s your name?”

“... What?”   
  
“Your name. I don’t know your name.”

Jeremy couldn’t help the way his voice cracked, “I… what?”

And Dustin said with a small, teasing smile, “Unless you _want_ me to call you Ecstacy Kid?”

Jeremy’s breath caught in his throat at the reality check.

Because that _was_ reality.

The reality was that Dustin hadn’t been paying as much attention as Jeremy had been paying to Dustin. The reality was that Jeremy wasn’t popular or cool enough to be known as anything else than a freak accident, and not by name. By that logic, why would he be cool enough to date Dustin? The reality was that, though in his fantasies Dustin automatically knew his name, Jeremy had never introduced himself to Dustin. They were absolute strangers.

And although Jeremy consciously knew that that was reality, it hurt to hear it out loud.

Dustin noticed Jeremy’s disgruntled expression and, thinking it was due to the rude nickname, softly reassured, “I’m joking.”   
  
And Jeremy said, “Well, I’m Jeremy.”

For once, Jeremy was glad to see embarrassment return. It covered up the minor heartbreak.

Dustin stared at him for a moment before nearly keeling over in laughter. He wiped away a tear that wasn't there. “That’s a new one. You’re funny, Freckles!"

Jeremy stared at the floor. On second thought, not talking seemed like a much better decision compared to this.

Once he’d calmed down he said, “Jeremy. Okay. He has a name.”

Unable to help himself, Jeremy peeped out, “What do you mean?”

“What do you mean, what do I mean?”   
  
“‘He has a name.’ What does that-” Jeremy realized that the question was needy and stupid halfway through his sentence, and cut himself off, “nevermind.”

Nonetheless Dustin smiled and answered. “Well, if a cute boy was suddenly in your radar and interfering with business, you’d want to know his name too.”

Jeremy was quickly discovering that not only did everything Dustin say leave him with more questions, but also left him with several conflicting emotions and no idea where to start. At that point he was torn between being called both cute and an interference. He decided to go with part two. Dustin hadn’t called him cute. He’d definitely misheard.

“Am I really, um, in the way? Of…” He hesitated, “business?”

“Yeah. You keep distracting me.”   
  
Jeremy’s heart sank.

But then Dustin tacked on, “It doesn’t seem like it, but it makes me nervous to work in front of hot guys. Can’t focus.”

Jeremy’s blush stretched down to his neck as his head snapped up. There was no way he’d misheard _that_ one. “Uh- what!?”

“Hey, you’re pretty cute when you blush.”

“ _What!?_ ”

Dustin was laughing again, but Jeremy’s brain was still trying to catch up. Him? Cute? Hot? Dustin calling him cute and hot? It didn’t compute, and Jeremy found himself whispering, “Me?”

Dustin scoffed lightly. “There’s nobody else here, Freckles.”   
  
“I... guess there isn’t.”

Dustin chuckled and stole another fry. Jeremy was almost tempted to just give him the whole basket. 

Silence filled the air. It was out of place how uncomfortable it felt. Jeremy and Dustin had been nearly nothing but silent up until that point, so why did it suddenly seem out of place?   
  
“Sorry,” Jeremy muttered, “I’m just-”

“Scared?” Dustin cut in. Jeremy looked to him. 

His face had suddenly gone melancholy, staring down at the table, similar to how he’d looked the first time he’d asked if Jeremy was scared of him. Still, he didn’t seem surprised. Jeremy realized that fear was likely the usual reaction strangers gave Dustin, and that if Dustin were to sit down at any other table randomly the occupants there would fear for their lives. His nervous behaviour was likely giving Dustin that false impression.

So Jeremy shook his head and quietly reassured, “No.”

Dustin looked to him, eyes a little wide.   
  
“I never was.”

Then a phenomenon happened.

The teasing, glazed look in Dustin’s eyes vanished and was replaced with a deeper gaze. He blinked at Jeremy, tense and confused. His brow was slightly furrowed as if silently asking, “why not?” and whatever retort he’d had planned just… died.

For a fraction of a second, he was vulnerable.

He snapped back quickly, catching himself with a smooth, “Well that’s good. I don’t bite.” At the end he quietly teased, “Unless you’re into that.”   
  
Jeremy’s stomach turned at the comment and he looked away. He couldn’t find it in himself to be too embarrassed, though. It was too late. Whatever he’d just seen had shattered his world view a little. Because that had been Dustin off guard.

And Jeremy wanted to see him off guard again.

The bell rang.

Dustin stood up and stretched. “Well, it was nice sitting with you. The name’s Dustin.” He picked up his tray and shot Jeremy a knowing smirk, “But you already knew that.”

“I... Yeah.”

Dustin saluted. “I’ll see you around, Jeremy.”  
  
Upon hearing his name in that _voice,_ Jeremy couldn’t find any response and chose to dumbly stare and swoon. Dustin chuckled, turned, and walked away.

Walked back towards the popular kids table.

… Who had probably been watching that entire time, Jeremy realized, as Dustin was greeted with whoops.

Jeremy turned away, a dying whale noise leaking from his mouth.

The emotional exhaustion of humiliation, sadness, love, and some other fourth thing crashed into Jeremy full force. As the cafeteria emptied out, Jeremy sighed and stared down at his (now cold) fries, before taking a deep breath and screaming into his hands.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've realized that the only cafeteria food I've written Jeremy eating is French fries and I've decided he will only eat fries for the rest of the story.


	7. In Which Michael Finds Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Confidence. Just have confidence. Just walk over and sit down. Confidence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No chapter next week- I'll be on vacation B) 
> 
> with minimal wifi B)
> 
> But here's a short chapter to tide you over!
> 
> (Also I've never read Catcher In The Rye lmaoooooo)

In English on Tuesday they were supposed to be writing an analysis essay on The Catcher In The Rye. The teacher said, “Sit wherever you want,” before standing up and leaving, probably to smoke a cigarette in the bathroom or do whatever teachers did when they left class.

Jeremy was busy watching Dustin, because of course he was, when this announcement was made. Several girls who were sitting near him pointedly stood up and moved a couple tables away from him. Others followed, and soon Dustin was isolated in his corner of the room, as usual.

But now, Jeremy thought, now he and Dustin were… Friends? Acquaintances? If Dustin could stand up and walk over to Jeremy when he was all alone at lunch, why couldn’t Jeremy do the same?

So he made a game plan. Not an effective one, since it boiled down to: walk over, sit down, say hi, say something smooth. But it was a plan, he decided as he closed his laptop, stood up, and took a shaky breath.

_ Confidence. Confidence. Pretend Michael’s pushing you to sign up for play rehearsal. This is just like that. If Dustin did this so can you. _

So Jeremy started to walk. 

It was only when he was halfway across the room that he realized he was going to voluntarily sit down next to a rumored murdurer and people were definitely staring at him. He tried not to tremble. He was in too deep already.

Dustin was focused on his laptop screen, dutifully typing at his keyboard, so he didn’t notice Jeremy had arrived.

Jeremy cleared his throat and tried to keep the wobble out of his voice. “Um, hi.”

Dustin physically paused, calibrating, then turned to look up at Jeremy. His face melted from confusion into recognition and he smiled. “Hey.”

“Can I, um…” Jeremy pointed to the empty seat, forgetting how to talk as soon as Dustin’s eyes were trained on him.

“Oh. Oh, yeah, sure!” Dustin reached over, shoving away some of his stuff that had spilled over into the other side of the table. Jeremy sighed and took his seat. The hardest part was over, and it hadn’t even been so bad!

“... What made you come over here?” Dustin asked.

Shit. Shit. Right. Game plan. Say something smooth.

Jeremy searched back in his mind for what Dustin had said in response to Jeremy’s very similar question the day prior. He remembered and blurted, “Well, um, not to be like, um, rude, but you look really fucking pathetic sitting over here by yourself.”

Dustin stared at Jeremy, calibrating again. Shit. Was that too far?   
  
Jeremy was about to start profusely apologizing when Dustin must’ve remembered and started laughing, which would’ve made Jeremy’s knees weak had he not been sitting down.

“You’re an asshole, Freckles.”

Dustin could probably call Jeremy an asshole un-jokingly and Jeremy would thank him.

“A- am I wrong?” He stuttered out instead, because that would’ve been weird to say.

“Partly. You forgot to mention the part where you noticed I was staring at you.”

Jeremy froze up, face flushing. He knew it was probably a joke and he shouldn’t get hopeful, but still he asked, “Uh- were you?”

“Yeah.”

Jeremy choked on air.

Dustin started laughing harder, “What? You asked!”

“I- I didn’t think you were being serious!”

“Well you must not be paying enough attention then.”

Jeremy flushed and chose to open his computer rather than responding.

Dustin. Staring at him. At _him._ There was no way it was real.

A quick glance between Jeremy and Dustin’s computer was absolutely embarrassing. Jeremy had less than two sentences written whereas Dustin already had a paragraph done. Which meant either he’d started early or he was just That Good. Jeremy tried to collect himself and started typing. And deleting. And typing again. And deleting.

“Can I pay you to write this for me?” Jeremy groaned out after five minutes of no progress.

Dustin chuckled, “That’s a first. Usually it’s math stuff.”

“People pay you to do their math homework?”   


“People pay me for everything.”   


Jeremy wasn’t sure how to take that comment. He was scared to ask.

“Anyways,” Dustin went on, “It’s not that hard as long as you like, actually read the book.”  
  
Jeremy flushed. “I… Sparknotes.”  
  
“Oh. You’re one of _those_ people.”

Jeremy panicked, the implication that _those_ people were people Dustin didn’t like horrifying him. He frantically backtracked, “I- no! Joking. I’m joking.”

“‘And I’m _Jeremy,_ ’” Dustin retaliated with a chuckle.   
  
Jeremy made a dying whale noise. He was never going to live that down. 

Dustin was laughing though, so that was a good sign. It was always good to hear Dustin laugh anyways.

Right. Jeremy was sitting with his crush. Cool.

After that things died down and the two of them went to doing their separate things. Or, at least, Jeremy tried to. It was hard to pay attention to essay writing when he kept sneaking glances at Dustin, who was in total focus. Hard to pay attention when his crush was a foot away from him and he was two seconds away from absolutely losing it.

Eventually Dustin sighed and closed his laptop. 

“You’re _done?_ ” Jeremy asked incredulously.

“Nah. Class is almost over.”

Was it? A glance at the clock on his computer told Jeremy it was. Time flew when he was looking at Dustin, he supposed. 

Dustin was also detrimental to his work, he decided as he realized he didn’t even have his introduction near finished. He slammed his laptop closed in embarrassment before Dustin could see.

“You should sit by me more often,” Dustin said with a smile.

He should!?

“But I- I don’t really say much.” That was untrue. He just didn’t know what to say.

“You never did in the first place, cutie.”

_ Cutie!? _

Dustin went on, “That’s okay though. You’re nice to look at so it doesn’t really matter.”   
  
Jeremy’s excuses for why Dustin would be saying stuff like that to him were quickly disappearing. He had to wonder…

“A- are you _flirting_ with me?”

Dustin blinked at him, then burst into wheezing laughter, rocking in his seat. Jeremy’s face had never felt so hot.

“It seriously took you _that_ long to realize? God, you’re adorable.” Dustin rolled his eyes, “Uh, yeah. I am.”

Why was Jeremy always the last to know? His heart soared excitedly, almost disbelieving at the confirmation.   
  
Wait. Dustin was flirting with him, oh shit. Could that mean-

“Do… do, uh…” Jeremy stared at the floor, wringing his hands together and praying his voice wouldn’t fail him, “Do you… like… um…”  
  
The bell rung. Dustin shook his head. “Damn. Hold that thought. I’ll see you in a minute.”  
  
What the fuck did _that_ mean!?

Before Jeremy could think to ask, Dustin sped away out of the classroom.

Jeremy sat there completely silent as the class emptied out. He was stunned, confused, and _Dustin Kropp was flirting with him holy shit._

Unsure of what else to do, Jeremy gathered his things, tried not to literally squeal, and hurried to lunch.  
  


 

 

“Yo!”

The voice wasn’t Dustin’s, thankfully, as Jeremy wouldn’t have been able to handle that. He was beyond relieved to see a red sweatshirt bouncing towards him.

“Michael!”   
  
“I lived, bitch!” Michael said, pulling him into a side-hug.

“I missed you, dude!” Jeremy said with a giant grin. A friendly face was just what he needed after the chaos that was fourth hour.

Michael almost immediately launched into a rant about a new video game one of his moms had gotten him while he was sick. Jeremy listened happily, reveling in the familiar voice and instantly feeling much less alone.

“But I couldn’t figure out the puzzle, so I…” Michael trailed off suddenly, his face falling and his eyes looking past Jeremy. Confused, Jeremy turned around.

He nearly fell out of his chair when he saw Dustin standing in front of him.

“Hey,” Dustin said, “this is for you.” He handed Jeremy a sticky note with a phone number (and a winky face, oh God) on it.

“Uh-”   
  
“Do you wanna get Dairy Queen on Friday after school?”   
  
“What?”   
  
“By the way,” Dustin continued with a smirk, “since you’re kinda dense, this is me asking you on a date. Just to clarify.”

A record player scratch sounded in Jeremy’s head.

“ _What!?_ ”

“Is that a yes?”   
  
“I…” Jeremy’s brain decided to forget words yet again. It was all so sudden and unbelievable but then again Dustin _had_ been flirting with him but then again there was no way he'd like anyone like  _Jeremy_  but _yes_  Jeremy wanted to go on a date, what the fuck!?   
  
He forced himself to nod and came up with an, “Uh.. uh huh.”

“Cool. Text me later.”   
  
And with nothing else but a wink, Dustin turned on his heel and left.

Jeremy stared after him in silent awe and shock. Did that really just happen? Did he just get asked out? By _Dustin Kropp?_

And then:

“What the _fuck!?_ ”

Oh shit.

Jeremy very very slowly turned around to face a bewildered, almost furious Michael with a sheepish grin. “So… funny story-”

“What the fuck was _that!?_ I was gone for _two_ days!”  
  
“Um… well it kinda started before that, haha…”  
  
“You… wait…” Michael said accusingly, pointing a finger at him, “you mean this entire time you’ve been staring heart eyes at my fucking _plug!?_ ”

“Well…” Jeremy shrugged and whispered, "I mean yeah, basically...?"   
  
Michael crossed his arms, “You have some God damn explaining to do.”   
  
That Jeremy did. So he did explain everything. As he retold it, he started realizing how fucking weird the situation was. The circumstances were so bizarre that Michael shot him doubtful looks several times throughout the re-telling, and Jeremy had to reassure him that yes- that did happen!

Still, he couldn’t help the grin on his face when he finished with, “And now I have a date with him in 3 days!”   
  
Oh God.

_ Jeremy had a date with him in 3 days. _

This was gonna be a disaster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready.


	8. In Which Jeremy Cries In a Dairy Queen Parking Lot (Twice)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But they didn't stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: This chapter contains descriptions of sexual harassment (do you wanna hang stuff. so- not horrible, but it's there). If this is a sensitive topic for you I advise you skip this chapter.
> 
> Ok that's all.

Jeremy was pretty sure the Dairy Queen logo was ingrained in his eyelids. If the date went well, he’d be seeing nothing but darkness and DQ when he closed his eyes. If the date went horrible, he’d still be seeing nothing but darkness and DQ when he closed his eyes, but he’d also be crying a lot.

Case in point, he’d been sitting in his dad’s car, staring at the light-up sign for more than fifteen minutes. To be fair, Jeremy had come early. 5:40, 20 minutes before the time they’d agreed to actually meet up. Jeremy was planning to be the first one there, super punctual and stuff, but as with everything else in Jeremy’s life- it failed.

There was just too much to stress about. Did he look okay? What was he supposed to say? Why was Michael so shit at giving advice? Who was paying? Were they paying for their individual ice-creams? Oh God, what flavor was he going to get?

His phone dinged. Jeremy audibly yelped and scrambled to grab it.

 

**OH MY GOD:** _here ;) waiting inside_

 

What!? When!? Jeremy hadn’t even seen him walk in, let alone arrive in any sort of car.

Hands shaking, Jeremy frantically flipped to his messages with Michael and started typing.

 

**P1**

 

_ HE’S HERE. _

 

_ GO IN _

 

_ I’M SCARED _

 

_ remember the plan _

 

_ WHAT plan!?!??!?! _

 

__ the one we made duh  
  


_ OH OF COURSE. would that be the one where the  _

_ game plan was to- if i remember correctly- “idk  _

_ just go with it”??? _

 

_ hey!! that sounds like a good plan!! i  _

_ came up with that???? i’m so smart _

 

_ MICHAEL. _

 

_ jesus ok. _

 

_ did you at least respond to his message? _

 

_ … _

 

_ jeremy. _

 

_ oh my god. _

 

_ jeremy.  _

  
  


_ i left him on read. _

 

_ jeremy heere. _

 

_ oh god oh fuck he’s gonna hate me or think i _

_ ditched him oh my god what am i gonna do _

 

_ i  _

 

_ i literally can’t believe you right now _

 

_ oh god i think i’m gonna start crying in a dairy _

_ queen parking lot this is bad michael help _

 

_ well maybe a good place to start is to _

_ FUCKING RESPOND TO HIM. _

 

_ oh shit you’re right. _

 

 

Indiscreetly wiping at his eyes, Jeremy switched over to his and Dustin’s (very short) message history. He decided to lie a little to buy himself another minute or two.

 

**OH MY GOD**

 

_ here ;) waiting inside _

 

_ cool! nearly there _

 

_ don’t text and drive that’s illegal _

 

_ also it could kill you and having my date die _

_ on me would make my night pretty shitty so _

 

_ hhhhhhhh _

 

 

Jeremy felt that summed up his thoughts on the conversation pretty well. He shut his phone off and leaned back in his seat.

Deep breaths. This would be fine.

It absolutely would not be fine. If Jeremy couldn’t even make it through a text conversation with Dustin there was no way he’d be able to survive a real one.

They were really, actually alone this time. No peers to watch over Jeremy’s shoulder, but in a way that made it all the more nerve wracking. Jeremy would feel more singled out without a crowd of people. Then again, wasn’t that the point?

Jeremy decided not to dwell on it. He smoothed out the hem of his shirt. Okay, he needed a plan.

Or, according to Michael, he didn’t. That had been his advice.

_“You always overthink everything. You gotta stop worrying and just enjoy it. Have fun. Don’t make a plan. Just go for it,”_ Michael had said, completely stoned, before shooting Jeremy finger guns, _“Send it.”_

Jeremy physically cringed at the memory. 

Thinking on it, Michael never had a plan for everything, and he was always confident. Everything turned out fine for him. Maybe he was right. Maybe Jeremy shouldn’t overthink.

Jeremy was overthinking about overthinking. Wow. That was next level.

Another text dinged on Jeremy’s phone- this one not from Michael nor Dustin.

 

**dad:** _Good luck! Don’t scare her off!_

 

Jeremy smiled nervously despite himself. He’d told his dad that he was on a date. Just not that it was with a guy. He was still working up the courage to have that conversation. Still, he appreciated the sentiment.

It was funny, though. Like Jeremy would scare _Dustin Kropp_ off and not the other way around.

Then again, Dustin would probably just leave if Jeremy didn’t show up soon. It was go time.

So he checked his hair in the rearview mirror, took a deep breath, and got out of the car.

* * *

 

“Hey.”

Oh God. Why didn’t he make a plan. This was awful already Oh God-

“Um, hey,” Jeremy stuttered out, wiping his sweaty hands on his jeans. 

Dustin was sitting in a booth near the door, stretched out across the entire seat like a cat. He gave Jeremy a lazy grin. “Took you long enough.”

“I- haha-” Jeremy laughed nervously, stomach dropping in terror, “Yeah, I’m really sorry. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting? I was just-”   
  
Dustin sat up. He rolled his eyes, but he was still smiling so Jeremy figured he wasn’t too annoyed. “I was joking, Freckles.”

“Oh. Right.”   
  
Jeremy stood in the doorway, completely stiff, and did his best to avoid eye contact. 

“So.”   
  
“So.”

Then Dustin stood up, walked over to him, and grabbed his hand as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Jeremy choked on nothing. “Uh-”

“What?” Dustin asked easily as he laced their fingers together.

Unable to actually say anything, Jeremy just looked between Dustin and their joined hands over and over.

Dustin caught on and laughed, and Jeremy realized he should have wiped his hand even more because he was _absolutely_ sweating. “Well? This is a date, right?”

As if it were the first time it had actually, _really_ set in, Jeremy breathed out, “Oh my God. It is.”

Which made Dustin laugh more as he dragged Jeremy over to the counter.

Jeremy didn’t pay attention to what Dustin ordered (something chocolate and marshmallow), too hyper-focused on the physical contact to the point that he was completely caught off guard when it was his turn to order. He decided on a simple cup of vanilla after sputtering nonsense for a solid five seconds.

As they waited, Dustin still didn’t let go of Jeremy’s hand. Not that Jeremy was complaining, he just wasn’t expecting for the hand holding to happen so soon. He turned and absolutely indiscreetly stared at Dustin, some part of his brain making an excuse that if ever, _now_ was probably the acceptable time to do that. 

And as he stared at Dustin, who looked as good as ever, Jeremy had the revelation that _it was happening._ He was holding hands with _that._ He was on a date with _that_. For literally the first time in his life, someone he liked also liked him back.

“What are you smiling at?”   
  
“Oh. Uh… nothing,” Jeremy reassured with a grin, snapping out of it. Still, the giddy feeling didn’t leave him, doing well enough to block out some of the fear.

The cashier returned with their ice creams, did the whole upside-down trick, and set them down on the counter. Before Jeremy could reach into his pocket, Dustin had already paid for the both of them and was guiding Jeremy away towards a table.

It was fairly empty, save for a family eating in a booth near the center, but Dustin was dragging them all the way over to the corner, near the window.

Dustin turned to Jeremy and quickly looked him up and down. “... You’re taller up close,” He commented, more in a note-to-self fashion than to Jeremy.

“You’re shorter up close,” Jeremy retaliated as Dustin (finally) let go of his hand. He sat down and Dustin sat across from him.

“Rude,” Dustin chuckled, taking a bite of his ice cream. Jeremy figured it would be best to do the same, so he did. It tasted like absolutely normal vanilla. He was incredibly disappointed in himself for not picking something more interesting.

Right. He should probably say something.

“Uh… why here?” He stupidly decided on.

“Why here?” Dustin repeated.

“Like… why go _here?_ " Jeremy clarified, before tacking on, “Not that I don’t _like_ it, I was just… um… yeah. Just wondering.”

Dustin shrugged. “It tastes good.”

“Oh.”

Jeremy cursed himself for asking such a stupid and obvious question.

“You’re kinda cute when you’re panicked, by the way.”

Jeremy thanked himself for asking such a stupid and obvious question.

“Uh- really?”   
  
“Yeah. I like it when you’re flustered.”

Jeremy should not have liked the way Dustin’s voice went a little low there, but he did. He _really_ did.

“Uh, well, it’s easy for that to happen around you,” Jeremy admitted, laughing uneasily. That was a bit transparent of him to say, but he was rolling with it. He just needed to relax.

Thankfully, Dustin seemed to like the sound of that. “Is that so?”

“Y- yeah.”

Dustin didn’t respond to that, but the way he eyed Jeremy should have probably been illegal. Jeremy got a horrible feeling in his stomach, one that felt really good. It was gonna be a long night.

* * *

 

 

Jeremy followed Dustin through the parking lot, a smile on his face. It had been less scary than he’d thought it would be and he wasn’t being cliche when he said he didn’t want the night to end. It had mostly been like every other time they’d talked, with Dustin relentlessly flirting and Jeremy being endlessly flattered. He was getting better at not getting _as_ flustered as before around Dustin. And by “better” he meant he could at least breathe when it was happening.

Still, he wished he’d been able to hold a real conversation with him about interests and whatever. Smalltalk stuff. He’d sort of wanted to get to know Dustin more but the opportunity was never presented. And whenever Jeremy tried to ask, Dustin would just flip it around and never really answer any questions.

Not that Jeremy hadn’t had a great time, though. As they neared Dustin’s car, Jeremy readied a goodbye and even was mustering the courage to ask if they wanted to do it again another time.

But then Dustin turned to smile at him and asked, “Well?”

“... Well?”   
  
“Are you getting in?”

“Oh, no-” Jeremy smiled and politely waved him off, “I have my own car.”

“I know. But are you getting in?”   
  
At a bit of a loss, Jeremy asked, “Um… why?”   
  
Dustin didn’t respond, just gave him another illegal look that left pretty much no more room for arguing.

As he got in the passenger seat and Dustin got in the driver’s, Jeremy felt a little uneasy at the weirdness of the situation.

“You’re not gonna like… kidnap me, are you?” Jeremy tried to joke, but it sounded a little more seriously worried than intended.

“That would be a new one,” Dustin laughed. “No. I’m not.”

“Well that’s good.”   
  
The silence was heavy. Dustin made no move to start the car or anything, so no lights were on and there was no engine running. It was a little chilly, and dark. Jeremy could just make out silhouettes and outlines, and not much else.

“... So,” He coughed out.

Dustin didn’t answer yet again. Then there was a hand on Jeremy’s cheek. Jeremy let out an audible yelp, his heart skip beats every second the contact was held.

“Relax,” Was the response from the dark.

“Uh, um- what…” Jeremy didn’t finish the question. There were rustles as Dustin moved closer to him, apparently leaning over the center console.

Jeremy felt cornered. There was nothing but the sound of breathing and all Jeremy could feel was absolute unease. 

And just as he was about to make an excuse to leave, Dustin kissed him.

It was absolutely out of left field, and Jeremy completely stopped working.

More than anything, Jeremy was confused rather than excited. That was _really_ fast. Jeremy figured that was more like a second or third date thing. Was this how dating worked? Was this a good sign? And then, on the other hand, oh God Dustin was kissing him and Jeremy had never kissed anyone before (save for Brooke when he had the squip, but that didn’t count) and he had no idea what to do-

Dustin pulled away.

“You’re thinking too much.”

“I- uh- wha- I- what?”

Dustin went on, tone patient. “You just need to relax and go with it.”   
  
“I’m- not good at that,” Jeremy said, for lack of a better word.

Dustin’s hand slid from Jeremy’s cheek to his neck, and Jeremy’s shoulders raised automatically at the tingly sensation.

“Hey, this is fun, right?”   
  
“What?”   
  
“Kissing and stuff. It’s supposed to be fun, yeah?”   
  
“Y- yeah?”

“So have fun, then.”

And honestly, when Dustin said it that way, it kinda made a little more sense. Here Jeremy was in a car with the boy he was infatuated with and he was being given a chance to kiss him. Why would he be worried? He was wasting irreplaceable moments.

“Yeah… Okay. You’re right,” Jeremy agreed, shaking everything off. They were gonna kiss, he decided, and it was going to be awesome.

“I always am,” Dustin prided, a laugh caught in his voice. Jeremy swallowed. Ok, wow.

Dustin started to lean in once more, and despite himself Jeremy felt the nerves fire up again. He willed his eyes to close, despite not being able to see in the first place.

It was a hover, the tipping peak on a rollercoaster as Dustin hesitated for him, giving Jeremy one more chance to back out. When he didn’t, Dustin closed the gap again and it was _real_ that time.

Jeremy reminded himself to relax, letting out a tiny breath, and stopped focusing.

And it worked, sort of. He actually could appreciate it, could feel the gentle press of lips vividly. 

And he went with it. He thought that maybe tilting his head would feel better. So he did, and it did! He acted instead of worrying, raising a hand to rest on Dustin’s shoulder, because contact felt good.

And that kiss was good. And then they kissed again, and it was better. And again, and it was great.

And for the first time in months, Jeremy’s head felt completely, perfectly _blank._

It started off gentle. Then it wasn't.

After giving Jeremy a minute to get his bearings, Dustin started to waste no time. Jeremy felt a sharp nip at his lower lip that sent a jolt of electricity through his body. Ok, _wow._

It was getting warmer in the car and Jeremy was getting images of the car sex scene from Titanic stuck in his head. Which then made him think of the “it’s been 84 years” meme. Which made him laugh, except for the fact that he was kissing Dustin so he’d pretty much laughed into his mouth like a total weirdo.

Dustin pulled away. “What?”

And because there was no way in hell Jeremy was telling Dustin he’d gotten distracted from their makeout session by a fucking meme, Jeremy stuttered out, “No- nothing. Just, um, crazy that this is happening right now.”   
  
There was a smirk in Dustin’s voice. “Why’s that?”   
  
“Uh- you’re hot?” He blurted, still panicking over Gloria Stuart killing the mood.

That sentence hung in the air between them- another rollercoaster hill. 

Thankfully, Dustin marveled, “Shit, you’re cute,” before leaning in to kiss Jeremy again, so that was a good sign.

Dustin moved his hand away from Jeremy’s neck, opting instead to grab onto his seat for support. Jeremy’s eyes went wide as Dustin crawled over the center cup holder and sat himself _on Jeremy’s lap._

And the car was suddenly twice as warm as before.

There was an air of impatience as Dustin obviously took the lead, the kisses becoming more and more bruising, more take than give. Jeremy just sat and reveled in the abuse, still incredulous to the fact that _this was happening._

The hand was back, but there were two now. They danced over Jeremy’s ribcage, sending stumbling butterflies absolutely wild. Up, down, up, down. Slowly. Savouring. 

It felt to Jeremy like many of his other interactions with Dustin that made him feel so weak- the fact that for once in his life someone was paying such intense individual attention to him. Except this time with all the touching and silence it felt magnified to the point of almost being too much.

The hands went down. Hovered over Jeremy’s stomach. Down more. Oh God, down _more?_

One slipped under the hem of Jeremy’s shirt and Jeremy flinched at the intrusion. It didn’t move around much, just roamed over his waist a few times. Still, it was enough to make Jeremy’s breaths go shaky. The car was silent.

It was only when Dustin’s other hand moved down and unbuttoned Jeremy’s jeans that Jeremy realized that everything about the scenario was terribly, horribly, completely _wrong._

Because wait a minute, Jeremy thought as Dustin broke off to kiss at his neck, this was a date. A first date, if anything. And while Jeremy still didn’t know how popular people worked, he was pretty sure that fucking on a first date was a big no-no even for them.

Jeremy just about disregarded everything the squip had told him. However, when it came to him briefly dating Brooke the squip had explicitly told him that nothing big would happen on the first date because Brooke “wanted it to last” and that moving too fast was a one-way ticket to “breaking her trust and setting back our progress. This isn’t a fan fiction Jeremy. Stable relationships take time to build and you really must learn to tame your hormones.”

Jeremy shivered, whether from the memory of the condescending voice or the bite Dustin delivered to his jaw, he didn’t know.

Still, although he hated to admit it, Microsoft Cortana had made a good point. And God knew Jeremy wanted this to last. What was even going on here?   
  
“Wait- what are we-” doing, Jeremy didn’t finish, breaking off into a gasp as Dustin leeched onto the skin just above Jeremy’s collar. The reaction made Dustin chuckle lowly, as if he was in on a cruel joke Jeremy was clueless to. Jeremy would’ve been extremely turned on, but alas, confusion killed the boner.

Still, Jeremy didn’t understand. One minute they were having ice cream and laughing and the next _this?_ It didn’t make sense. Jeremy hadn’t planned on it going this way. He didn’t think he _wanted_ it to.

He tried to repeat himself, but his voice came out weaker than he wanted. “Wait- stop…”

But Dustin didn’t stop.

This was when the panic started to set in.

Why wasn’t he stopping? Why was it so dark? Jeremy couldn’t see a thing that was happening to him right now and he felt so disoriented...

The cranking bass from downstairs was not helping whatsoever, pounding through his head and interrupting his thoughts. And the _smell_. Jeremy was drowning a cloud of cherry lavender perfume cloying the air- practically choking him and stinging his throat. Yeah, Jeremy was getting the hell out of here.

But he couldn’t. He was pinned. Something was on top of him. He couldn’t move his legs.

This was wrong. He just wanted to have fun like everyone told him to. Why was he here all of a sudden? He didn’t want this at all, he thought. Every kiss felt wrongly placed and the caress of hands that would’ve felt nice were ruined by flawless, scraping acrylic nails.

Jeremy’s heart hammered, adrenaline from pleasure transforming to fear. Except he couldn’t fight or flee. He wasn’t allowed to. He couldn’t move.

“S- stop!” Jeremy repeated, pleading now.

But Chloe didn’t stop.

Jeremy couldn’t breathe. It was too crowded, too dark. Too much touching he couldn’t get away from. He didn’t want this. He hated it. He hated it. He hated it.

Using the last of his will- for the third time- “Stop, _please!_ ”

_Then_ Dustin stopped.

Jeremy blinked. He was in a car. His legs were pinned but he, himself, could move them if he wanted to. The hands were gone, and through the faint light filtering through the window Jeremy could see Dustin looking at him, concerned and confused.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

But Jeremy was still caught between memory and reality and couldn’t give a straight answer. “Get off me!” He blurted, the reality that he did, still, have a little bit of control being the single hope that was keeping him from a total breakdown.

“What?” Dustin questioned again, frozen.

But Jeremy could move, he knew, so he started to shove the boy off, repeating, “Get off me now!”

Finally Dustin reacted, scrambling off and back into the driver’s seat, which was awkward to do with so little space, but he managed. As soon as the pressure was off his legs Jeremy opened the car door and threw himself into the parking lot.

If he had the sense to be more self conscious, Jeremy would’ve found it humiliating to cry on the pavement in front of an ice cream shop. However, at that moment all Jeremy could do was curl up on the ground, appreciating the wide open space around him.

Jeremy stayed there for a while, just breathing and calming himself down. Finally, after a while, the last traces of phantom perfume seemed to disappear until all he was breathing was clean air.

The world returned to him. He was staring up at the stars, and when he slowly sat up he was staring right at the same LED sign he’d been looking at when he first arrived, though it was blurred through his tears. A blob- Dustin- was walking up to him.

“Holy shit, are you okay?” He asked, crouching down to Jeremy’s eye level.

Shit. Jeremy was crying in front of his crush. Not cool.

Wait.

Betrayal. That’s what Jeremy felt next. “Why didn’t you stop!?” He yelled, scrambling to get as far away from Dustin as possible.

Dustin's eyes frantically darted. “I- I didn’t know what was going on- I thought…”

Jeremy choked on a sob and tore his eyes away.

Dustin seemed at a loss for what to do. “I’m really sorry, Jeremy,” He tried earnestly.

Jeremy didn’t know what else to say. All he knew was that he didn’t want to be there and he didn’t want to be with Dustin.

So he took a deep breath and shakily stated, “I want to go home.”

Looking up to meet Dustin’s eyes, Jeremy could tell how hurt he was. Not that Jeremy particularly cared- he deserved it. Dustin seemed guilty, too, so that was at least a little comforting.

“Yeah,” Dustin said after a minute, nodding a little, “Yeah, okay. Sorry.”

Jeremy closed his eyes, trying to physically drain the anxiety out of himself before attempting to stand up. The world spun a little and he stumbled forward at the sudden movement. Dustin rushed forward and grabbed his shoulder to try and steady him, but the contact only succeeded at spiking even more panic. He flinched back from Dustin, eyes wide.

“Sorry-” Dustin said, worry even more apparent than before.

Jeremy didn’t respond to him, just made sure he wasn’t going to fall over again before wordlessly starting to walk away. If he stayed another minute he'd probably vomit.

“Hey,” Dustin called after him before he could get too far. Jeremy turned back to face him. “Are you sure you’re gonna be okay getting home?”

Jeremy just glared at him. _Yes._

“... Okay.”

Jeremy turned away again, marching to his car and tried to not think about the wounded look in Dustin’s eyes on the car ride home.

* * *

 

Jeremy had almost made it safely to his room when his dad caught him.

“Hey! How’d it go, private? Mission success?” He asked, grin too big.

Jeremy stared at the floor, not responding, before entering his room and slamming the door behind himself.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told y'all to get ready.


	9. In Which Michael Invents the Worst Word Ever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's behind me, isn't he?

When the guy you have a crush on turns out to be a total asshole, your world view shatters a little, as Jeremy would find out.

_ (“I’m giving up on love,”  _ Was all he’d said to Michael about the situation.

_ “Don’t be so dramatic,”  _ Michael had chided over the phone.

Silence.

Michael piped up again, more concerned- _“Dude, are you_ crying?”)

Dustin had texted him a couple of times to profusely apologize but Jeremy had ignored them. The less he thought about the “date” or whatever it was, the better.

He _dreaded_ school on Monday and was tempted to fake sick, but he- knowing that missing even one day of school was an absolute pain in the ass- decided it wasn’t worth it. 

The way Dustin’s eyes burned holes into him during English was ridiculously hard to ignore, but thankfully they were lectured all hour and didn’t get the chance to move seats. Jeremy slipped out before Dustin could talk to him.

He’d plopped down in his seat during lunch- about to shrivel up and die- only to be interrupted by a slushie getting thrust in his face. Blue- of course.

“Hey…?” Jeremy looked up at Michael.

“Uh… thought you could use this,” Michael explained with a pitying smile. “I dunno. I’m sorry.”

“No,” Jeremy offered a tiny smile, taking it gratefully. “You’re the best, Mike.”

“Don’t call me Mike,” Michael grumbled, taking a seat next to him. 

Michael must’ve sensed that Jeremy didn’t want to dwell on it further and started launching into a rant about a lion documentary he’d watched. Truly, Jeremy didn’t deserve a friend who could read him so well. Jeremy actively listened in and kept his back turned to the popular kids’ table.

Halfway through a sentence about how in movies, lion roars were substituted for tiger roars, Michael trailed off and stared at something behind Jeremy’s shoulder. He gave Jeremy a look that read, _“Welp.”_ Which Jeremy returned with a look that said, _“He’s behind me, isn’t he?”_

There was an uneasy moment of silence before Dustin said, “You have to go to the bathroom, don’t you Michael?” The same un-objectable tone he’d used with Jeremy.

And as if Michael was a sim Dustin was controlling, Michael stood, shot Jeremy a pitying look and walked away.

Jeremy had known this conversation was inevitable. That didn’t mean he was ready for it.

“... Can I sit?”

Jeremy stared down at Michael’s- now empty- chair. “Sure.”

Dustin filled the empty space and Jeremy kept his eyes trained on the lower half of his body. Neither of them said anything right away. Dustin’s posture was stiff and awkward and very un-Dustin like, and it looked like he was fidgeting with something in his pocket.

“I’m sorry-” He finally blurted, “I didn’t know what was going on and I didn’t know I was hurting you, and-”   
  
“Why didn’t you stop?” Jeremy cut him off. If they were going to have this conversation, Jeremy wanted it over with and there was no point in sugarcoating.

Dustin seemed slightly caught off guard by how blunt the question was before once again repeating, “I didn’t know what was going on- I just assumed-”  
  
“Assumed _what?_ ”

“... That you were ready?”   
  
Jeremy let out a single, disbelieving laugh. “For what?”

“... You know. I was just-”   
  
“No- shut up,” Jeremy snapped. He still didn’t look up to meet Dustin’s eyes and silently hoped his eyes would shoot lasers into Dustin’s perfect abs.

Dustin shut up.

“What made you think I was ready for anything _like_ that? I know we haven’t talked a lot, but it should be pretty easy to tell I don’t have experience with people like… that.”

“I know. That’s why I called it a date and stuff. I thought it would make you more comfortable.”

Yeah, as if anything could have made him more comfortable about that, Jeremy thought.

Wait.  
  
“... What do you mean ‘called it a date’?”  
  
“Uh, like I said. So you wouldn’t be nervous, I guess.” More pocket fidgeting. “Plus, Michael was sitting right there and I figured you wouldn’t want him to know.”  
  
Jeremy had no idea what he was on about. “Know what? It _was_ a date.”

Dustin had the audacity to laugh, just a little, “Uh, no it wasn’t.”

Jeremy froze. “It wasn’t?”

“... It _was?_ ” Dustin retaliated, clearly just as confused as Jeremy was.

Jeremy didn’t like the mutual misunderstanding. He balled his cardigan sleeves in his fists as he tried to figure it out. If it wasn’t a date, then what was it? Getting ice cream and talking seemed like date criteria. Holding hands seemed like date criteria. Even kissing seemed like date criteria.

Sex was also date criteria, Jeremy knew. Just not _first_ date criteria.

It hit him like a truck.

“Were you trying to _hook up_ with me!?” Jeremy yelled, twice as furious as before. Dustin flinched back, startled.

“Uh- yeah?” He got out after a second, panic building in his voice. “I thought you knew. I thought you wanted-”

“Why the fuck would I want that!?”

Dustin crossed his arms over himself- a defense. “I don’t know! Why did you always act so flustered whenever I talked to you? Why did you stare at me so much? Why would you try getting close to me like that?”  
  
Outraged, Jeremy stood up, finally meeting Dustin’s eyes as he yelled, “Because I _like_ you, Dustin! Like, actually fucking like you! Like, want to be your boyfriend like you!”

And then everything was quiet. Jeremy had gotten the attention of half of the cafeteria, but for once he didn’t care. All of that teasing and flirting and back and forth wasn’t even _real._ Dustin didn’t like him. Of course he didn’t, Jeremy realized as tears started pooling in his eyes. It was just a game to him. Jeremy was just a game to him. What was the point of even hoping?

But then he was looking at Dustin, _really_ looking at him. And Dustin…

His eyes were wide and his tense posture slowly melted at Jeremy’s admission. For the first time since Jeremy had talked to him, he was at a loss for words. He blinked owlishly, shrinking under Jeremy’s intense stare.

It was still absolutely silent, still sinking in. Then finally from Dustin- a single word, disbelieving: “... _Me?_ ”

Jeremy had never heard his voice like that before.

He scoffed, “Yes, you! What? don’t act as if you-”   
  
Dustin’s eyes went impossibly wider.

“You… you didn’t know…?” Jeremy finished. But that wasn’t right- Jeremy had been so obvious. So stupidly obvious, right?

Right?

Dustin shook his head no.

Slowly everything started to click. “You thought I wanted to hook up with you and that’s it. And you were going to do it.”

So Dustin didn’t like him. That part was right. Maybe Dustin saw him as acceptably hot though- at least enough to fuck. Wow, what a great confidence booster, he thought.

“I-” Dustin stuttered.

“You don’t actually like me.” It didn’t hurt any less to say out loud. But at least Dustin wasn’t _that_ much of a jerk. He didn’t mean to be so manipulative- he’d assumed they were on the same page. Jeremy felt worse about yelling at him and started to cry. This was quite possibly the worst indirect rejection in history

“What? No!” Dustin bolted out of his seat to stand in front of him, “I do! I do like you!”

“Sure,” Jeremy sniffled.

“No- Jeremy, I _do,_ I swear. Everything you said, I… want that.” 

And yeah, Dustin sounded honest, and Jeremy believed him to a degree, but it didn’t add up.

“Please don’t cry,” Dustin whispered.

“If you do then why didn’t you ask me out like a normal person!?” Jeremy asked, frantically wiping at his eyes.

Dustin gave him a wounded look. “I thought you didn’t like me like that.”

“Doesn’t staring at you and forgetting how to talk around you and- and literally _everything_ I did give off that impression!? I don’t think that equates to ‘hook up’.”   
  
“But-”

“Do I look like the person who would want to hook up with someone?” Jeremy gestured at himself, “Even if I was too nervous to ask, why would you assume something like that?”

Dustin looked away.

“So do you like me or not?” Jeremy finished, exhausted.  
  
“... I _do,_ ” Dustin insisted, though it sounded more like a plea.

“And the signs were kind of all there.”

“... Yeah.”

“So why would you _do_ that? Why didn’t you just ask me out, or... Something?” Jeremy asked, quickly losing his confident steam.

“I didn’t think you liked me like that,” Dustin repeated quietly.

“Why?”   
  
Silence. Dustin’s eyes darted, thinking.

“Do you want to go on a date with me?” Is what he asked.

“... What?”

“A _real_ one. The last one was really shitty and I want to try again. For real.”   
  
Jeremy stared at him, sufficiently distracted from the previous argument.

“If you don’t want to, I get it. I shouldn’t have… yeah. I was stupid.”

And though Jeremy was still confused, and angry, and very upset, he took a moment to think for once.

Because at the end of the day, there was a miscommunication. The situation had been read wrong on both ends (even if it didn’t make sense), and the result was a fluke. If Dustin had gone into it with the full awareness of it being a date, maybe it would’ve turned out differently. Maybe now that it was all cleared up, it would be better the second time. Besides, it would be immature to lose the chance of a relationship because of a misunderstanding- since misunderstandings were supposedly a vital part of romantic relationships anyways (or so Jeremy had heard). Plus, Jeremy still had a gigantic crush on the guy, even if he was furious with him.

Just as Dustin looked like he was going to take it back, Jeremy sighed, “Okay.”

“... Really?”   
  
Jeremy wiped his eyes, trying to put himself back together, and nodded. “Yes. Fine. It was a screw up. We can try again.”   
  
Dustin instantly relaxed. “Thank you.”   
  
Jeremy nodded, finally managing to (somewhat) halt his tears. Then he gave a tiny laugh, because honestly, seeing Dustin so upset was weird and freaked him out a little. “Did you just thank me for saying yes to going on a date with you?”

Dustin cracked the tiniest grin. “Not what I meant.”   
  
“This is a first, I gotta say.”   
  
And then Dustin laughed. And then Jeremy laughed. And the hatchet was buried for the time being.

The bell rang. The tables around them started murmuring as if they were discussing a movie and Jeremy suddenly became very, _very_ self conscious.

“Oh God…” Jeremy mumbled, hiding his face in his hands.

“Don’t worry, they probably think you’re cool for yelling at me,” Dustin soothed, instantly back to his normal self.

“Oh my God, I yelled at you,” Jeremy realized aloud. “I’m so sorry-”   
  
“Don’t worry about it. I kinda deserved it.”

Yeah, he kind of did. But Jeremy didn’t say that. He was over it. Totally.

Over Dustin’s shoulder Jeremy saw Michael watching from the distance, waiting for the okay to come over.

“I… have to go.”   
  
Dustin nodded. “Yeah. Uh… text me later?”

“Sure. Uh, later.”   
  
Dustin waved and walked away.

Jeremy stared at his- basically melted- slushie as Michael walked back over.   
  
“Well? Do I need to kick his ass?”   
  
“I’m going on another date with him.”   
  
Michael laughed and clapped his hands together like a seal.

Jeremy didn’t respond, drinking his slushie (flavored water at that point).

“Oh, you’re being serious.”   
  
“Yeah… It was a misunderstanding.”   
  
“Well that’s good.” Michael shrugged as they started to walk to their next class. “I don’t actually think I’d be able to kick his ass. By the way, I literally had to eat my sushi in the bathroom. So either you or he owes me one.”

Jeremy rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry… Thanks for leaving us alone for a bit.”   
  
“Yeah, I know, I’m the best.”

More people in the hall seemed to be staring at Jeremy, though nobody said anything. He tried to keep his head down.

“Jesus,” Michael mused, “I can’t believe you’re actually going on another date with him, though. I was kinda hoping you’d move on and inevitably try to bang someone _else_ in Christine’s family, since they’re your type I guess. That would’ve been funny.”   
  
Jeremy looked up at Michael, lost. “What do you mean?”   
  
“Don’t you know? Dustin is Christine’s cousin.”

Jeremy physically stumbled as he walked, sneakers squeaking on the floor. “ _What!?_ ”

“Yeah, dude. You totally must have like, a kink for her bloodline or something.”

“They’re _cousins!?_ ”

Michael didn’t answer. He spent the rest of the walk to class trying to figure out how to combine “Canigula” and “kink” into a single word (“Canigukink? Cankinkula?”), eventually landing on “Kinkigula” as Jeremy hyperventilated. What a day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~MICHAEL'S WORD OF THE DAY~
> 
> Kinkigula- noun:
> 
> 1\. A term referring to a person who has an explicit sexual attraction limited only to people who are a part of Christine Canigula's family.
> 
> "My friend Jeremy is both a furry and a kinkigula. He really wants to get in Christine's cousin's pants."


	10. In Which Mochi Makes an Appearance And That's All That Matters, Honestly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second time's a charm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy birthday quark!! (1/3)

**dustin**

 

_i am begging you to let me take you to ikea_

 

_i would actually rather die_

 

_babe :(_

 

_i got lost in an ikea once and i  
refuse to relive that trauma_

 

_damn ok_

_walmart then._

 

_dustin._

 

_i’m being serious_

_what could be more romantic_  
_than two people saying hi to_  
 _soulless greeters?_

 

_dustin._

 

 _remember that 2017 trend of_  
_making forts in the shelves with_  
 _li_ _ke_

_toilet paper?_

_and staying overnight?_

 

_dustin._

 

_we could do that_

 

_i’d rather not get in trouble  
with the law on our first date _

 

_gets the adrenaline pumping ;)_

 

_dustin._

 

_or you could come to my house_

 

_dustin._

 

_not in a sex way._

_we could like_

_watch shitty romcoms or_

_something_

 

 _better. i’m gonna say let’s do it_  
_bc i’m scared of what else_  
_you’ll come up with if I say no_

 

_fair enough_

_see you later~_

* * *

Michael drove Jeremy to Dustin’s house (to “make sure it wasn’t actually a secondary location”) and dropped him off. He waved goodbye, drove away, and Jeremy was off to the races.

To say he was nervous was an understatement. Jeremy stared up at the house and tried to collect himself, reminding himself that it would be different this time and he had nothing to worry about. If anything, it was cold and he ought to get inside, so he slowly walked up the steps and knocked on the door.

Dustin greeted him shortly. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

“Come in.”

Jeremy did. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting Dustin’s house to look like, but it seemed like pretty much any other house. Michael was wrong in that, no, there weren’t eight bags of cocaine laying on the counter or anything weird like that. It seemed perfectly normal.

“Are your parents home?” Jeremy thought to ask.

“No.”

That was probably good, Jeremy figured as Dustin led him over to the couch. It would be awkward to get interrupted like that.

They sat down and Jeremy scanned the area. It looked like Dustin spent a lot of time in the living room.

There were pillows just about everywhere, blankets coated in what looked like fur, weed grinder, eyeglass box, was that an advanced physics book?

“Usually I just play whatever’s on Hallmark when I do homework,” Dustin explained with a shrug, referencing the current channel on the TV.

Jeremy nodded. “Cool.”

They went quiet as the sound of the TV played. Jeremy looked over to Dustin and saw him quite literally thinking of something flirtatious to say. When it dawned on him he smirked and turned to Jeremy.

Jeremy cut him off before he could start saying it. “Tell me about yourself.”

Dustin faltered. “What?”

“Tell me about yourself.”

“No-” Dustin shook his head and chuckled, “I’m boring.”

Jeremy raised an eyebrow. “Sure you are.”

“I mean there’s really not a lot to say. You probably have a lot more going on than I do.”

Which, they both knew wasn’t true. Jeremy was admittedly still a little nervous to initiate anything and would rather let Dustin talk, especially since he hardly knew anything about the guy.

Dustin opened his mouth, probably to make another excuse. Jeremy pointed to the physics book before he could speak. “What’s this? Are your parents into science or something?”

Dustin visibly shifted in discomfort. “Uh, actually it’s mine.”

“You take physics?”

“Yeah. Also I just kinda… read it sometimes. I’m kinda into that stuff, I guess.” Dustin admitted.

Jeremy’s eyes widened as he grabbed the book and flipped through it, not understanding a single word. “So you’re like, actually really smart then?”

“I’m told so, yeah,” Dustin admitted oh-so-humbly.

Jeremy looked up at him, excited. “How are you with math homework?”

“Didn’t I tell you people pay me for that stuff?”

His excitement drained instantly. “Oh, yeah.”  
  
Dustin smirked. “Benefit of dating me is that it’s free.”  
  
Jeremy chuckled and set the book back down before leaning back into the couch, trying to get comfortable. “You, uh, make a compelling argument.”

It would be nice to never fail math again, Jeremy thought to himself. Dustin scooted a little closer to him.  
  
“Wow,” He said, rolling his eyes, “I’m more than just a pretty… brain?” He shook his head. “That one didn’t work.”

“Not really.” Jeremy’s eyes gravitated towards the eyeglass box again and he reached for it, taking the glasses out. He remembered these from seeing Dustin wear them once- another cause for his bisexual epiphany. “You look cute in these.”  
  
“You’ve seen me wear them?”

“Only once. But you- you do.” He slid them on his own face and wow, those were almost as strong as Michael’s. “You’re... really blind,” He commented, scrunching his nose up at the intensity.

“And you look adorable right now,” Dustin retaliated, resting his face in the palm of his hand as he stared at Jeremy.

Jeremy fiddled with the sleeves of his cardigan, face instantly heating up. “Uh- really?”

“Yeah.”  
  
So maybe Jeremy wasn’t totally immune to Dustin’s flirting yet.

Jeremy kept them on for another minute until the strain started to physically hurt his eyes. He slid them off and put them back in the box. “You should wear them more often.”

“... Chloe thinks they’re too nerdy.”

Jeremy scoffed. Of course she did.

“Well- well _I_ think they’re cute.”

“... I’ll keep that in mind.”

Jeremy nodded, satisfied with the answer, and turned back to the TV. “What are we watching?”

“Whatever’s on. Unless you want something specific?”

“This is good,” Jeremy said, because that level of decision making was too much for him. In fear of the conversation dying he asked, “Uh- what do you- um, do you watch any shows?”

Dustin thought on it for a minute, then shrugged. “I watch The Good Place a lot.”

The name rung a bell but, “I’ve never seen it.”

Dustin gasped, eyes wide in horror. “Leave.”

Jeremy stupidly worried he was being serious for a split second. “Is it- is it good?” Which was a stupid question because yes, if Dustin liked watching it then it was probably good.

Dustin was already reaching for the remote and flipping to Netflix. “We’re watching that instead.”

“O- okay!” Jeremy shrugged, glad that was settled.

Dustin queued up the first episode as Jeremy reached for a blanket to wrap around himself.

“Have you ever tried marshmallow ice cream?” Dustin asked on an offhand after it was set.

“No, but that’s an amazing sounding name.”

Dustin turned to him with a smile. “Do you _want_ to try some?”  
  
Jeremy nodded enthusiastically and Dustin was off to the kitchen. As soon as he was gone Jeremy sighed and told himself to relax.

Already Jeremy felt so much more comfortable than he’d been on the last date, and whatever he was experiencing were just simple nerves. Dustin seemed a lot more touchable, per say, in that there was clearly some sort of outer layer that had been stripped away. That was good. Jeremy liked this Dustin a lot. He wasn’t anywhere as scary as the one from Dairy Queen.

What _was_ scary, however, was the faint scratching noise that seemed to be coming from behind a door just a little ways away. Jeremy stared at the room and bit his lip as the noise got louder and more frantic. Michael had joked about Dustin keeping kidnapped people in his basement, but…

Dustin returned shortly with two pints of ice cream, pausing upon seeing Jeremy’s terrified face. “What?”

Jeremy pointed towards the door with a shaky hand. Dustin listened for the noise, then laughed. “Oh, that’s just my cat.”

Jeremy’s mood did a 180. “You have a _cat?_ ”  
  
“Yeah. Her name’s Mochi.”

“You have a cat and you didn’t _tell me!?_ ” Jeremy asked, absolutely betrayed.

Dustin laughed, “Do you wanna meet her?”

“ _Yes!_ ”

Dustin walked over to the door and opened it. Immediately a cat shot out and launched itself onto the arm of the couch before turning to face Dustin and staring at him.

He shrugged at her. “Sorry, bitch.”

Jeremy could barely contain his excitement. “Can I pet her!?”

“Sure.”

He raised a hand and scratched her behind the ears, earning a surprised _mrrp_ out of her as she turned to face him. She was a beautiful calico and her fur was insanely soft.

“She likes everybody. She’ll warm up to you really quickly,” Dustin promised, returning to the couch and sitting back down next to Jeremy.

And sure enough, very quickly Mochi padded up closer to him before sitting down at his side. Jeremy smiled as she started to lightly purr.

“So, to review,” Dustin said, “The benefits of dating me are: never failing trigonometry again, getting to pet my cat, and endless marshmallow ice cream I steal from the freezer at Costco.”

“Are you… are you trying to sell me on dating you?” Jeremy half-teased half-asked.

“Perhaps.”

Dustin’s last selling statement caught up to him.

“Wait, you stole that?”

“Uh...” Dustin immediately tried to backpedal, grabbing a carton and shoving it in Jeremy’s face with an innocent smile. “Try some!”

Jeremy raised a suspicious eyebrow, but took the ice cream and cracked it open. Dustin passed him a spoon and he took an experimental bite, his eyes immediately widening. It tasted like a golden-brown, perfect for s’mores marshmallow, except cold. “Oh my God.”

Dustin nodded, enthusiastic. “I know, right?”

“How is this even possible?”  
  
Dustin shrugged, taking a bite out of his own. “Sold yet?”  
  
“On what, dating you?”

“Yeah.”

And yeah, the fact that Dustin was trying to impress _him_ and not the other way around was a little bizarre, but Jeremy would be lying if he said he didn’t like it.

So he teased him by saying, “Depends on how good this show is.”  
  
Dustin immediately rolled his eyes and reached for the remote. “Don’t be that way. It’s not my fault you’re so uncultured.”

Jeremy smiled as the episode began to play. Mochi crawled over his legs to sit in Dustin’s lap, and Dustin got more comfortable. As in- he curled in closer to Jeremy. Their sides pressed together and Jeremy felt his face go red. Dustin was warm. It was nice, like a personal heater.

It was a comfy silence as they ate their ice cream to the sound of the TV and Mochi’s purrs. Jeremy told himself to loosen up and, as soon as he had a free hand, went over a five minute debate in his head about whether or not he should wrap an arm around Dustin. He was running out of bravery pretty fast, but if Dustin was willing to get this close to him it probably would be fine.

So slowly he rested an arm over Dustin’s shoulders. Dustin, thankfully, leaned into it, and Jeremy gave a sigh of relief. Yeah, this was _very_ nice.

 

 

After a while of watching, Jeremy felt a new pressure on his shoulder. He looked over to see Dustin’s head resting there. Dustin’s eyes were closed and his breath had evened out, and oh shit, he was asleep. There was a hot boy asleep on Jeremy’s shoulder.

Jeremy’s breath caught as he stared at Dustin’s face for a minute, which he would’ve considered creepy if not for the fact that he stared at Dustin all the time anyways. He couldn’t help at smile but the boy next to him.

Then settled in the panic in that Jeremy had no idea what to do in this situation.

He quietly whispered Dustin’s name, just to make sure he was actually out. When he didn’t rouse, Jeremy looked around the room, as if that would help him. His eyes landed on Mochi who was staring him down with an unreadable cat-expression. She was no help.

Should he leave? Was this Jeremy’s cue to leave? It was getting pretty late anyways, even if it wasn’t a school night, and Jeremy had no idea when Dustin’s parents would be home. Would they not mind seeing Jeremy on the couch with their son, or was there some sort of rebellious don’t-tell-mom thing going on?  
  
It was probably best to leave, Jeremy decided. Still, he didn’t want to be rude. He reached for the nearest throw pillow and laid it on one end of the sofa before beginning the perilous task of extracting himself from underneath Dustin without waking him. He slid out, slowly guiding Dustin down until he was lying with his head on the pillow. Jeremy took one of the blankets from the floor and spread it out on top of him, wondering if this is what being a mom felt like.

He figured he should leave a note, so he tracked down a pad of sticky notes and wrote one out before sticking it on one of the (now empty) ice cream cartons. Then he shut off the TV and shot one last look at Dustin, who was comfortably curled up. He was cute when he was asleep.

After giving Mochi one last pat on the head Jeremy headed to the door, intending to flick off the lights and leave.

But then a voice from behind him asked, “Where are you going?”

Jeremy jumped and yelped, startled. He whirled around to find Dustin sitting up and looking at him, 100% awake.

“Were- were you awake that whole time!?”

Dustin countered with, “Why are you leaving? Did I do something?”

“No? I was leaving because you were asleep and I had no reason to just hang around like a creep?”  
  
Dustin stared at him blankly. “Oh.”  
  
“... Is… is that weird?” Jeremy asked, growing more and more uncomfortable with every second.

“No, nobody’s ever reacted that way before, is all.”

Jeremy just shrugged whatever that meant off for the time being as Dustin stood up to meet him at the door.

“It’s probably late, isn’t it,” Dustin said, more a statement than a question.

“Yeah…” Jeremy coughed, suddenly wishing that Dustin _had_ been asleep so that no awkward goodbye would have to happen. Alas. “I had a really good time, though.”  
  
That seemed to put Dustin at ease. “Me too,” He said with a nod and a smile, “We should… do it again sometime?”

Glad that he didn’t have to be the one to ask, Jeremy nodded. “Totally.”

“Sick.”

Jeremy opened the door, grinning like an idiot. He stepped out but turned back to say a quick, “See you at school?”

In the span of five seconds, Dustin said, “Totally,” Then grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, pulled him down, kissed him on the cheek, and said, “Have a good night.”

Jeremy straightened up, a blushing mess. “You- uh- y- you too!”

After Dustin shut the door Jeremy immediately clapped a hand over where Dustin had kissed him, his knees feeling weak. He let out a childish giggle as he hopped down the steps and pulled out his phone to text Michael to pick him up (because yeah, Michael would still definitely be awake at this hour, without a doubt).

And for some reason Jeremy would never be able to explain, the simple kiss on the cheek made him feel more giddy, excited, and in love than any of the real kisses Dustin had given him on their first date. The smile never left his face the rest of the ride home.

* * *

 

Pretending to fall asleep had become a staple in Dustin’s dating life. Early on in a relationship he’d always get himself and his potential partner into a scenario where he could realistically take a nap, then pretend to fall asleep, then just see what would happen.

It was a test for the awake-person in question, to see how they’d react to vulnerability. The best case scenario would be that they’d pull Dustin closer and eventually fall asleep themselves. Worst case scenario- they did something dick-ish, and no, he would not elaborate.

There was no such thing as being too safe.

But he’d never, _ever_ had someone leave before. A part of him worried Jeremy was still caught up on their first date and that he totally hadn’t even wanted to hang out with Dustin in the first place and was looking for a chance to leave. But no, Jeremy had laid a blanket over him and shut everything off for him and the, “you were asleep and I was awake and I was going to continue being awake, so being in your house would’ve been weird and awkward” explanation he’d given made a surprising amount of sense. There wasn’t a rush to leave. Jeremy had been…

Tender.

Dustin turned away from the door and started to walk back over to the very couch they’d been in not ten minutes prior. Mochi sat on the very top of it and watched him like an adorable gargoyle.

“Can you believe that?” He asked her, because he had nobody else to ask.

Mochi meowed at him, though he was pretty sure it was in hunger rather than agreement. Dustin assured her that he’d feed her very soon, and thanked her for her patience, to which she didn’t respond.

Dustin sighed and flopped down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. That had gone well…? Or, at least better than last time. Jeremy seemed like he was willing to go on another date, at least.

At least.

Dustin turned his head to the side to face the television, obscured by the coffee table and trash on top of it.

The trash that had a note on it.

Dustin squinted, sat up, grabbed the Post-it note, and read it. Immediately he cracked up and felt his heart beat a little faster.

A single word, signed at the bottom:

 

_SOLD!_

           -J

 

Oh, he _really_ liked this one.


	11. In Which Christine Uses Her Power of Ultimate Conviction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The stars look beautiful.
> 
> You know who else is beautiful?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy birthday quark!! (2/3)

The following Monday, this time in much better spirits, Jeremy was stopped by Christine bouncing up to him in the hall.

He and Christine were on relatively good terms considering what had gone down. She had rejected him in the end, sure, but it was definitely warrented and she promised that the two of them would stay good friends. Jeremy truly believed he didn’t deserve her. They said hi when they passed each other and in the rare couple of classes they had they would talk and catch up, and things were good that way.

But on Monday she rushed up to Jeremy and Michael after school with a flyer in her hands. She was out of breath, but nonetheless determined as she yelled, “Jeremy, oh my gosh!”

Michael would’ve probably been irritated to be interrupted mid-rant, but it was impossible to be mad at Christine. He waved to her and Christine paused for just a second to say, “Oh, hi Michael!”

“What’s up?” Jeremy asked her.

“Okay! So, I was talking to Mr. Reyes about the direction of our theatre department after the disaster that was a Midsummer Nightmare (with Zombies), and he said that it actually went really well and gained us a lot of attention!” She exclaimed, practically bouncing where she stood.

Jeremy had a feeling he knew where this was going, but he nodded enthusiastically and said, “That’s great!”

“So he _said_ he thought he might try and get the rights to something a bit more mainstream, because maybe some more people would be willing to join. And then, you know, _I_ sort of…” She giggled as if she’d done the most scandalous thing alive, “Slipped in the fact that we hadn’t done an inherently female lead yet, and how that would be cool to do even if I wasn’t the lead, you know? It would be good to give more girls the opportunity to be the hero.”

Jeremy nodded, as did Michael.

“Anyways, I guess he considered it because ta-da!” She flourished the flyer. “Annie Get Your Gun” was written across the top, and in parenthesis just below it, “(With cowboys _and_ Zombies!)” The image on the flyer seemed to be of a girl in a post apocalyptic setting. It looked like Mr. Reyes didn’t think a mainstream musical would be enough to convince the student body to try out, and that even more thrill factor was needed.

Still, Jeremy beamed, because there was no doubt Christine was going to finally get that lead she wanted. “That’s awesome Christine!”

“Yeah,” Michael snickered, “Let’s hope it’s a lot less… ‘real,’ this time.”

Jeremy elbowed him in the side, but Christine nodded.

“It should be,” Jeremy sighed, “as long as I’m not in it.”

“Well…” Christine drawled, rocking back and forth on her heels, “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” She paused. “That and another thing… I don’t remember what though.”

Ah. So that was the catch.

“Yeah… I don’t know if you noticed, but public speaking isn’t really my thing if I don’t have a computer to help me. I think I’ll leave this one to you,” Jeremy said respectfully.

“Oh come on! Even if you were a little nervous you were a natural! Don’t you care about theatre?”

“Yeah, Jer,” Michael piped in, “Don’t you care about theatre?”

_God damn it Michael._ “Well, I mean, _yeah,_ but…”

Christine stood on her tiptoes and grabbed Jeremy by the shoulder, looking intimidating despite her height. It must be a gene that ran in her family, Jeremy thought.

“Even ignoring all the squip stuff,” She pressed earnestly, “didn’t you have fun? You seemed passionate enough…”

Jeremy looked to Michael for help, but he was pretending to look at something on his phone, radiating “y’all hear sumn?” energy. Jeremy cursed him internally.

“I don’t know, Chris…”

“Please? It’ll be fun, I promise. We can audition on the same day and everything,” She cocked her head to the side and fixed him with gigantic eyes that could kill. “ _Pleeeeeeeease?_ ”

And because Christine was someone he, or anyone for that matter, couldn’t say no to (especially with _that_ face), Jeremy sighed and said, “I’ll think about it.”

Christine’s face split into a wide grin and she threw her arms around Jeremy in a hug. “Yes! Thank you so much Jeremy!”

Jeremy laughed awkwardly, still not used to pretty girls touching him, and got out a, “Don’t… don’t mention it.”

She let go of him after a minute and turned to Michael, with a mischievous grin on her face. “Oh Michael…” She sing-songed. 

Michael looked up from his phone, a deer in headlights. “Uh, yeah?”

“How would you feel…” She started, waving the flyer in his face.

Michael shook his head before she could finish, laughing awkwardly as if he’d rather be anywhere else in that moment. “Noooo… no no no.”

“Oh come on! Just try out?” She begged.

“I never want to go on a stage again, thank you,” Michael insisted, keeping his tone light despite being obviously deathly serious.

Christine picked up on such, nodding in understanding, but tapped her finger to her chin in thought. “Well… we could always use another grip, or maybe an assistant stage manager!”

Michael stiffened and looked to Jeremy for help. Nope. If Michael was going to look away when she was pestering Jeremy, Jeremy had every right to do the same.

So he smirked and said, “Say, Christine, isn’t our booth person graduating this year?”   
  
Michael stared him down with murderous eyes as Christine gasped.

“Yeah!” She exclaimed, “It would be super awesome to get someone else learning the ropes for when she’s gone! You wouldn’t have to go on stage or anything.”   
  
“Guys…” Michael mumbled, resolve slipping.

“Plus, you’re like, really good with technology stuff, right?” Christine asked, turning to Jeremy for confirmation. Jeremy just shrugged, because objectively yes, Michael was, but there was a difference between gamecubes and soundboards.

She took it as a yes and smiled wider, “You’d be a natural. Please?”   
  
And then she was fixing Michael with her puppy dog eyes, and though Michael was stronger than Jeremy would ever be, he, too fell into her trap. He sighed, “I mean… maybe.”

She wasn’t satisfied with the answer. “Maybe…?”

“Ugh. Maybe… Maybe I will. I’ll think on it.”

That seemed to be enough for her. She squealed and went in for a hug but Michael backed away quickly, hiding behind Jeremy.

Deciding he’d tortured Michael enough, Jeremy had mercy and cut in, “Thank you for telling us, Christine.”   
  
She nodded. “No problem. I wish I could remember the other thing I was gonna tell you about though…” After a minute of intense thought, she shook her head. “Nah. Maybe it’ll come to me later.”   
  
Jeremy hummed and waved to her, starting to walk away. “See you later, Christine.”   
  
“Yeah,” Michael snickered and called to her over his shoulder. “And tell Dustin that Jeremy says hi.”   
  
Jeremy felt his face flush red, because telling his used-to-be crush that he was dating(?) her cousin was not on his to-do list that day.

Christine gasped, snapped her fingers in a moment of “eureka!” and went “That’s it! That’s the other thing!”

“Oh God…” Jeremy muttered to himself. This was going to be fun.

He and Michael stopped in their tracks and turned back towards Christine. Her excited face was now replaced with one of worry, though she was still smiling. She looked like a mom about to give a kid bad news.

“Jeremy,” She started, “about Dustin? Just… um… be careful, okay?”

“Why?” Jeremy asked.

She fidgeted with the hem of her dress nervously. “Dustin’s… he’s a really good guy, don’t get me wrong. He just does some not-so-great stuff sometimes.”

“Wait,” Jeremy said, ignoring that statement, “You know we’re dating?”

“Um… haha… Well…” She shrugged, “The whole school kinda does…”

“Yeah,” Michael put in, “The whole thing during lunch last week was kinda a dead giveaway, dude.”

Great. Now Jeremy was out to the world, as if he needed another reason to get pushed into lockers. “Shit.”

“Language!” Christine chastised, “But don’t worry, nobody’s said anything… like… _bad..._ ”

“Except that you’ve upgraded from Ecstasy Kid to ‘Dustin’s New Bitch’,” Michael added.

Jeremy whirled to him, dread filling his entire body. “What!? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Michael shrugged and rolled his eyes. “I assumed you’d already overheard. Guess you’re too far in lovesick lala land to pay attention to that.”

Jeremy’s face went even redder. “I am _not-_ ”   
  
Christine cut in, “I just wanted to um… warn you about him.” She waved her hands frantically, “Well, not _warn_ you but just… like… be careful, okay?”   
  
Furrowing his brow, Jeremy quickly defended, “He wouldn’t hurt me,” on purpose, he added mentally at the end.

“No! I didn’t mean anything about that. Just…” She scanned the hall, as if afraid of being overheard, then leaned in and whispered, “He sells drugs, and I don’t really know how all of that stuff works for him, but I just…”

“Don’t want you to be in the wrong place at the wrong time?” Michael offered.

Christine pointed to him and nodded. “Yes, exactly.”

“Yeah, Jer, like…” Michael leaned in closer to him too. Jeremy hated how crowded he felt at that moment, “I know that this has been all fun and games so far but like, this is serious sketchy shit. You gotta be careful.”   
  
“Language,” Christine whispered.

Jeremy straightened up and backed away from them indignantly. “Well, I think I’m fine. I trust him.”   
  
Christine and Michael exchanged an uneasy look that Jeremy didn’t like. After a minute Christine smiled back at him, though, and said, “Okay, I trust your judgement. Just… Don’t let him pressure you into anything. Drugs are really bad, you know. He won’t listen to me…”

Pretending he’d never smoked anything before, Jeremy nodded, “Yeah, totally. Don’t worry.”

“I’ll watch out for him, don’t you worry,” Michael reassured. Jeremy elbowed him in the side.

“Alright. I’ll take your word for it.” Christine turned to Jeremy again. “It’s good that you’ve moved on and you’re using your feelings constructively. I’m proud of you.”   
  
And Jeremy admittedly blushed a little fondly at that. “Thanks, _mom_.”   
  
“Alright, I’ll get out of your guys’ hair now,” Christine sighed with a smile. “I’ll be expecting you two at auditions though!”   
  
“Yeah yeah, get out of here,” Michael teased.

Christine waved goodbye and bounced off in a flash.

Jeremy heaved a sigh of relief. “I’m glad she doesn’t think it’s weird that I’m dating her cousin.”  
  
“Oh, she does,” Michael said with a nod, “She thinks your Kinkigula-ness is terrifying and that you’re a giant creep. She’s just too nice to say anything.”  
  
“ _Michael._ ”

* * *

“Your cousin dragged me into signing up for another play.”

“Of course she did. She can convince anyone to do anything.”

Jeremy and Dustin walked side by side through the Menlo Park (not to be confused with the mall). They were heading back to drop Dustin off at his own house and say goodbye. They’d grabbed dinner together for their third date (not including the Dairy Queen one) and yeah, Jeremy had a really great time. Another night Jeremy legitimately didn’t want to end.

New Jersey was experiencing a “warm” winter at a whopping high of 27 degrees and no snow. Maybe taking a walk home through the park in late November was a terrible idea, but as long as Dustin was pressed close to him, Jeremy really didn’t mind.

Jeremy also knew there was a very pretty hill in the area they were walking up that had a perfect view over the rest of the park. He realized all too late that, wow, this was romantic as hell.

Dustin sat on the ground and Jeremy begrudgingly joined him (the ground was freezing- worst idea ever).

“Aren’t we supposed to be heading home?” He asked, shivering.

“ _You’re_ the one that practically dragged us up here.”

“I didn’t take into consideration how cold it would be. I just thought it would be pretty.”

And he was right. The sky was perfectly clear, highlighting every single star in the sky. The two of them went silent and stared, lost in thought though sharing each other's company.

The question on Jeremy’s mind was whether or not they were officially an “item” or not. Could he call Dustin his boyfriend? Were they there yet?   
  
Jeremy snuck a glance at Dustin through the corner of his eye. He sat, expression neutral as he stared at the sky. Jeremy wished he could see inside his head and know what he was thinking. Probably something cool, maybe drug related.

“Humans are made out a lot of the same material as stars,” Was what he said instead. Jeremy did not see that one coming.

“... Oh?”

Dustin’s eyes didn’t leave the sky.  “Or, I guess, we share the same material as stardust, if you want to be specific. Stars are more or less converters for those materials.”

Wondering what the point was, Jeremy pressed, “... Okay?”

Dustin seemed to snap out of his trance. “Sorry, you probably don’t care.”

“No!” Jeremy very quickly insisted, “I just… didn’t think you’d know about stuff like that.”

Dustin shrugged.

“Tell me more,” Jeremy insisted, leaning closer to him.

“Oh, uh, well,” Dustin started again, clearly surprised that Jeremy cared, “Well, the universe was originally comprised of hydrogen, mostly. Stars took that hydrogen and converted it into helium, which turned into carbon, then nitrogen and oxygen, and so on. Humans are also made up of hydrogen, carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, sulfur, and other stuff that stars are made up of.”

Jeremy stared at him, watching as his breaths turned to mist in the cold air.

“So we share a lot of elements with stars. I dunno. I just think that’s neat,” Dustin finished.

“It is,” Jeremy agreed, partially because he thought it was and partially because seeing Dustin ramble was his new favorite thing.

Dustin smiled a little, proud of himself.

“Is that how you get all your boyfriends?” Jeremy asked, “By science-talking them and telling them their zodiacs?”

Dustin immediately corrected him, “Those are two entirely different things. I like astronomy, not constellation stuff like that.”  
  
Jeremy pouted. “So you _can’t_ romantically point out the constellations to me right now?”

Dustin paused and considered this, turning to face him. “... I mean, I know where a _couple_ are.”

“Show me!”

Dustin laughed and decided to humor him, turning back to look at the sky. Jeremy stared, enraptured as Dustin pointed out where the stars lined up. Though, Jeremy wasn’t fully paying attention.

There was a look on Dustin’s face, caught in a mix of intellect and excitement, as if he were trying and failing to restrain his passion. Jeremy could just barely see him with how dark it was outside, but the stars and moon kept it from being anywhere as dark as it had been in the car. That seemed so long ago in that moment. The giant sky above combined with the tiny trees and park benches below them made Jeremy feel as if he were both the biggest and smallest thing in the universe. And right in the middle of it all was Dustin.

Dustin, whose eyes sparkled while talking about the stars. Who had gotten into a habit of sending Jeremy pictures of his cat, “just because”. Who held Jeremy’s hand and honestly, really liked him _for him_. Jeremy didn’t need any computer to fix himself because Dustin actually wanted _him,_ and he wanted Dustin.

And in that moment, as Dustin ranted on, Jeremy was met with the intense, undefeatable desire to kiss him.

He didn’t have many nerves to swallow, because it just felt right that time. He was on manual, hardly thinking as he raised a hand to gently cup Dustin’s face and turn it back towards him.

Dustin blinked at him in confusion, trailing off in his sentence. Without giving him a chance to ask questions, Jeremy leaned forward and pressed their lips together

Dustin made a surprised noise, but leaned into it willingly. Comfortably. It was just right.

And Jeremy didn’t feel so small anymore.


	12. In Which Jeremy Gets the "Best Friend Talk"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please get me out of here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy birthday quark! (3/3)
> 
>  
> 
> WARNING: this chapter contains more do you wanna hang stuff. not anything as explicit as chapter 8- more or less just talking it out. you probably don't have a lot to worry about, but I wanted to mention it just in case.

The last person Jeremy imagined getting stopped in the hall by was Chloe Valentine- whose reign was so supreme that he always referred to her by her full title in his mind.

Not only was she the last person he thought he’d have to talk to, she was also the person he least wanted to talk to. At all. Ever.

But when a 5’8 girl (6’, if you counted the heels) stormed down the hall straight at him, backlit and casting a shadow on him like something straight out of a mafia movie, Jeremy found himself paralyzed and filled with a sense of, “well, here we go” (a feeling that was rapidly becoming more and more familiar to him).

Chloe came up close to him, slammed his locker shut two inches in front of his face, and stated, “We need to talk.”  
  
Jeremy shrunk where he stood. “Um, hi.”

Without warning or explanation, Chloe grabbed him by the arm, her nails digging into his skin even through the sleeve of his cardigan, and dragged him around a corner into a secluded part of the hall. Jeremy felt his stomach twist and tried to keep his breathing even.

“Look,” Chloe started.

Jeremy cut her off before she could continue by choking out, “Please let go of me-”

Chloe stared down to where her hand was still firmly gripping his arm, as if she’d forgotten she was touching him in the first place, and released him. Jeremy heaved a sigh of relief.

“Look,” She started over, “I don’t really want to be seen with you so let’s make this quick.”  
  
The feeling was mutual, but Jeremy didn’t say that out loud.

“I need to warn you about Dustin.”

Of course, because that’s all Jeremy was known for anymore. Still, he’d rather be that than Ecstacy Kid.

“If you’re gonna tell me to be careful because, um, because he sells drugs and stuff, I already know, actually,” Jeremy gently stuttered out, immediately fearful for his life.

Thankfully Chloe just furrowed her brow and shook her head. “... No. Nobody cares about that stuff.”

“Oh… Then, um… Then what…?”  
  
Chloe sighed and crossed her arms, momentarily lost in thought as if searching for the right words. “I just… okay, I just need you to understand what you’re getting yourself into.”

Which was not what Jeremy was expecting at all. “Um… okay?”  
  
“He’s just…” She made a lot of vague, all encompassing hand gestures that explained nothing, “A _lot._ ”

“To…?”  
  
“To handle. And not a lot of people can do that, but if you’re gonna even attempt to you need someone to tell you what you’re signing yourself up for.”

Jeremy would’ve told her that he had no idea what she was talking about, but he was too scared to. She must have read it on his face anyways, because she sighed and rubbed at her temples.

“Just… Whatever you think he’s like, he’s not.”  
  
And Jeremy sort of knew that much. It was clear that was definitely some form of a flirty facade going on that he’d broken through (mostly). Still, the fact that Chloe Valentine herself felt the need to approach him and remind him of this was slightly concerning, to say the least.

“And if you hurt him, I _will_ kick your ass,” She finished with a glare.

That part was /very/ concerning. Jeremy fiddled with the cuffs of his sleeves and looked away, wishing she would just leave.

“I think he’d be able to handle himself,” Jeremy assured, “And I doubt _I’d_ be able to do anything that would… hurt him, or whatever.”

“I would think that too. Look at yourself.” Chloe nodded at him and gave him a one over, “But then again, I wouldn’t think you’d be able to start the modern robot apocalypse either.”

Jeremy’s face burned in shame because truly, she had a point. He stared at the floor and mumbled, “He seems fine, though. I don’t think that’s really-”  
  
“Dustin can take care of himself, but he doesn’t always do it… well?” She offered, “He’s… fragile, in some ways. But seriously don’t tell him I told you that. Don’t tell him I had this conversation with you period.”

Jeremy was very doubtful of those first couple statements, but the more he thought about it the more he could see a little bit of sense in it. He’d noticed a couple of things about Dustin that would almost make that make sense, but he really wasn’t in the mood to poke his nose where it didn’t belong. He was happy as things were and still honestly didn’t understand why Chloe felt the need to approach him in the first place.

“I- I won’t tell him. Is that all…?” Please, God, let that be all.

Chloe shot him a doubtful look, clearly knowing that he didn’t fully believe her. “I guess.” She shrugged, “I’m just glad I’m not the only one who has to babysit him anymore.”

“Yeah…”  
  
“You’re different from other people he’s dated.”   
  
That piqued his interest again. “I am?”   
  
“Yeah. He _really_ likes you. When you got upset at him after the whole failed hookup thing he would not shut up about how worried he was about you.”   
  
Which, cool, Chloe knew about that. Fun. Still, that was good to hear. A little flattering. “He was?”   
  
“Yeah, he felt terrible.” She leaned in closer to him and lowered her voice. “By the way, if he pulls something like that again, and I don’t think he will, but like, if he does, let me know and I’ll yell at him, or something. Like, boundaries are important and shit.”   
  
And Jeremy, who could never keep his mouth shut, mumbled, “Like you’d care about that,” under his breath. 

He thought she wouldn’t hear him. She did. Her expression immediately turned furious and she seethed, “ _Excuse me?_ "

“Noth- nothing! Sorry, I have to go-”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” She stepped closer to him and Jeremy’s back hit a wall. His nerves skyrocketed.

“Please don’t kill me,” He begged.

She continued to demand, “No, what are you talking about?” and it was clear she wouldn’t leave until she had an answer.

Jeremy had no confidence in his ability to lie. He just wanted her to leave him alone, and if the only way to do that was to tell her the truth so he could get out faster, then fine.

“Halloween,” He mumbled.

“What?”

“Halloween,” He repeated, a little louder, “... You hurt me.”

Chloe looked away from him as if she were physically searching for the memory.

“You were drunk so you- you probably don’t remember. A lot happened- it’s fine-” Jeremy rushed.

“No, what did I do?” She insisted in frustration, though it seemed like it was directed at her own lack of memory rather than him.

“You…” Jeremy swallowed thickly. “You tried to sleep with me.”  
  
She nodded after a moment in faint recognition “... Oh yeah. And?”

“And…” Jeremy thought of the nicest way to explain it. There wasn’t one. “And I _didn’t_ want to sleep with you. And I tried to tell you no but you didn’t really… listen.”

Chloe’s gaze remained perfectly blank as she took that in. Slowly more and more recognition dawned on her face until she whispered, “Oh shit.”

"Yeah, but like, it’s not a big deal anymore-” It really was a big deal, but Jeremy just wanted to leave rather than argue.

“Yes it is! Holy shit, I-” Chloe straightened up and clapped a hand over her mouth, eyes wide. Jeremy had never seen her wear an expression like that. “I’m so sorry, Jeremy…”

Jeremy had never heard her apologize for _anything_ before. It felt wrong. “It’s okay, I’m dealing with it.”

“Is that why… when Dustin tried-”

Jeremy cut her off, “ _Please_ don’t tell him.”

Chloe shook her head, “I won’t- he’d kill me. Jesus… I can’t believe I would do something like that…”

“You apologized, so it’s okay… I… I forgive you.” Jeremy was more weirded out that he had to forgive Chloe Valentine and for some reason not the other way around.

“That doesn’t mean it’s better.” She looked at him, dead serious and full of remorse. “If there’s anything I can do to make it up to you… seriously, let me know.”  
  
And having the most popular girl in school owe him one was even weirder, but just her saying that did make Jeremy feel a little better. Not that he wouldn’t still jump whenever she came in a twelve foot radius of him, but at least it was as resolved as it could be.

“Okay, I will.” Jeremy nodded. “Um… can I maybe… go?”

She nodded, still looking incredibly guilty. Jeremy would’ve almost felt bad if it wasn’t so awkward. Chloe backed away and Jeremy audibly sighed in relief.

“I’m really sorry, again.”  
  
“It’s okay.”

Then Chloe looked around the hall as if to check that they hadn’t been overheard. When she saw no one, she turned back to Jeremy and said, “This conversation never happened.” Malice wasn't in her voice though.  
  
“Yeah, totally.”

And then she waved goodbye and left.

Jeremy sighed in relief and hurried out of the hall, wanting nothing more than to just be home.

Still, Chloe “warning” him about Dustin was an experience. And she’d even said that Jeremy was different from other people Dustin had dated before. Was he supposed to take that in a good or bad way? Was Dustin really as difficult as she’d said?

Jeremy decided to shrug the weirdness of the ordeal off. Chloe was probably just being her overdramatic self, and Jeremy was probably overthinking. He really needed to stop doing that.


	13. In Which Michael Is Jesus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> MICHAEL.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is absolute chaos just fyi

**dustin <3:** _youre allowed to sit with us you know_

Jeremy looked up from the text, turning to look over at Dustin’s table. Dustin, Rich, and Jake all waved at him in sync. Creepy.

He’d thought about it, of course, moving tables to sit with his boyfriend. It was only fair.

Except there was Michael. 

Jeremy knew Michael would immediately take it as Jeremy ditching him for popularity again if he moved, so he dutifully remained where he was. It wasn’t a chore- because Michael was awesome, but yeah. Jeremy wanted to sit with his boyfriend sometimes. But bros before hoes, he supposed.

_i’m ok, thank you <3,_ he texted back.

**dustin <3:** _why not? something wrong?_

Jeremy glanced over at Michael, who was currently searching through a playlist, and bit his lip. He texted back: _can’t ditch michael_

Immediate response.

**dustin <3:** _oh he’s hot he can come too_

Jeremy blinked, unsure how to respond to that.  He shrugged it off and asked aloud, “Do you want to sit with Dustin?”

Michael looked up at him. “Huh?”

“We’ve been invited to sit with my boyfriend.”

Michael looked over to the popular table, expression souring just slightly. “Oh.”

So that was a no. “We… we don’t have to if you don’t want. I’m cool with staying here.”

“I just think it’s a trap, is all.” Michael shrugged.

“Or… Dustin wants to flirt with me more. Like… a normal boyfriend?”   
  
Michael groaned. “I hate when you make sense.”

“Again, we don’t have to,” Jeremy reassured.

Michael’s eyes turned to judgemental slits as he stared at Dustin’s table for a minute, silent. Then he shrugged and flatly said, “You can sit with them. I don’t care.”

“Without you?” Jeremy frowned. “No way, dude.”

Michael turned back to face Jeremy, his body stiff. “I don’t care. You should be with your boyfriend. It’s cool.”

“You’re allowed to come. Why don’t you wanna?” Jeremy asked.

“Stranger danger,” Was all Michael responded with as he started drinking his slushie. Though, it was half drinking and half biting at the straw, really. He only did stuff like that when he was agitated, Jeremy noted with a grimace.

“Well,” Jeremy mumbled, not looking for any confrontation, “I can just stay here. I like it here.”

Michael barely spared him a second glance. “Whatever you want dude. I don’t care.”

He kept saying he didn’t care, but Jeremy knew he did. Jeremy ate the rest of his lunch in silence. He missed Dustin.

* * *

 

**dustin <3**

 

_ so thats a no? _

 

_ i dunno. i don’t want to abandon him. _

 

_ but you’re not? i said he could come _

_ even chloe says its fine _

_ everyone kinda wants to meet him  
for some reason _

 

_ why? _

 

_ i don’t know _

_ rich has a thing for him though _

_ maybe that’s it? _

 

_ still??  _

 

_ What? _

 

_ i knew he had a crush on michael  
in the hospital _

_i thought he’d be over it by now_

 

_ hospital?  _

 

_ post-fire? _

 

_ oh  _

_ well does michael like him   
back?  _

 

_ michael hates all of you at the  
moment.  _

 

_ fair enough _

_ anyways  _

__ you can sit wherever you  
want. he shouldn’t tell you  
no.

 

_ he isn’t. i can just tell he’s upset _

 

_ why? _

 

_ he’s scared of me abandoning  
him again. _

 

_ when did you do that?? i thought  
you two were close and stuff _

 

_ long story _

 

_ … does this have to do with the  
thing chloe wont tell me about? _

_ or jake _

_ or rich _

_ or like _

_ anyone _

 

_ wdym?  _

 

_ the thing that happened at the  
play _

 

_ shit gtg my dad’s up he needs   
something _

 

_ oh _

_ ok _

_ goodnight <3 _   
  


 

Which was a lie. Jeremy’s dad was fast asleep. It was one AM on a school night, after all. Jeremy was exhausted, bound to consciousness only by anxiety and insomnia, but exhausted nonetheless. He wasn’t in the mood to explain to Dustin that he’d eaten Microsoft Clippy so he could fuck his cousin. All he wanted was to roll over and fall asleep.

But then he started thinking, because that’s all Jeremy ever did. Thinking that Dustin had no idea. Thinking that maybe that explained why Dustin thought he was such a good person. Thinking that once Dustin found out, he’d realize Jeremy wasn’t a good person worth dating. Thinking that once he found out about the Christine part he’d gut Jeremy like a fish.

Jeremy’s anxiety grew as he changed what side he was lying on every two seconds, switching between staring at the wall and the door to his closet like an automated fan.

What Dustin didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him, he decided.

It wasn’t comforting enough. Before he knew it was 5:30 and his alarm was going off. Jeremy was awake right away to turn it off on the first beep. Probably because he hadn’t been able to fall asleep in the first place.

* * *

The next day, lunch was silent and tense. Neither Jeremy nor Michael said a word to one another, Michael opting to immediately slip on his headphones instead. Jeremy picked at his fries and wished he was anywhere else.

After a while, Michael sighed and shot Jeremy an almost-glare. “If it’s gonna be such a big issue, you should just go.”

Jeremy flinched. He hated when Michael used that tone. He wasn’t used to hearing it. 

Still, he forced a tiny, polite smile and shook his head, “I’m good here, dude. Promise.”

Michael clearly didn’t believe it but didn’t comment further. Jeremy sighed in relief as his attention turned back to poking at his maki rolls.

Jeremy hated when they argued. He would probably go on appeasing Michael until he died- it was what Michael deserved. Besides, he wasn’t going to let his best friend believe he was abandoning him all over again. Jeremy had sworn to do better, and he was going to follow up on his promise no matter what.

But still… He shamefully felt that just sitting with Dustin once in a while wouldn’t be the end of the world. Maybe Michael was being a _tad_ unfair…

A shadow fell over Jeremy And Michael looked past him and went wide-eyed. Jeremy turned, expecting Dustin, but was surprised to find Rich standing there instead, hands in his pockets as he rocked back and forth on his feet.

Michael frantically clicked at the button on the wire of his headphones to turn up the volume as loud as humanly possible. He always tried to avoid talking to Rich to spare himself of his incessant flirting. Jeremy found it incredibly amusing.

Rich shot Michael a smile and wink. Michael pulled his hood up to hide himself as Jeremy stifled a chuckle.

“Hey tallass,” Rich greeted, turning his attention back to Jeremy, “Dustin’s been staring at you for like two days straight from across the room, and Chloe’s getting annoyed that he won’t pay attention to her.”

Jeremy’s face and chest blossomed in warmth as he stuttered out, “Wh- he has!?”

Rich ignored his obvious panic. “Yeah. And you should sit with us. Everyone wants you to!”

“They do?”

“Well, I do! And so does Dustin and Jake. Even Chloe’s cool with it, for some reason.” He paused. “Well, Jenna’s not a fan. And uh… Brooke is… against it.”

Jeremy stared at the table in guilt and reminded himself to apologize to her later. His list of apologies would probably never end. “They’re not the only ones.”

Rich raised an eyebrow.

Jeremy quickly checked to see if Michael was listening. He was turned in the opposite direction, back to the both of them, and his music was cranked so loud Jeremy could hear it from where he sat.

“I don’t wanna leave Michael,” Jeremy whispered to Rich once he was sure Michael wouldn’t hear.

“Oh. I thought he was invited.”

‘He’s not… convinced.”

Rich furrowed his brow, thoughtful for a moment, then straightened up with a smile and trotted over in front of Michael.

Jeremy couldn’t see Michael’s expression, but he definitely did see Michael curl in on himself and audibly sigh.

Rich mimed the action of taking a pair of headphones off, and after a begrudging moment, Michael took the message and slid his down around his neck.

“Hey, Mikey…” Rich greeted, seduction dripping from his tone.

Michael started putting his headphones on again. Rich reached forward and stopped him before he could.

“We were all wondering if you’d like to maybe come sit with us? With Jeremy?”

“No thank you,” Michael responded instantly, voice polite but tart.

Rich pouted and took the closest seat next to him, to Michael’s chagrin. “But everyone’s dying to get to know you.”   
  
Michael barked out a laugh, disbelieving.

“No, I’m serious, dude! If a hot guy showed up to save you from getting a computer virus, wouldn’t _you_ wanna get to know more about him?”

Michael shifted just a little. No response.

“We’d all really enjoy having you,” Rich insisted, then slipped in, “ _I’d_ enjoy having you.”

Michael turned his head, looking at Rich’s table, and Jeremy followed his gaze. They clearly had an audience, watching the conversation go down, but they all turned away to seem inconspicuous as soon as Michael started watching.

‘“People are gonna stare at me,” Michael mumbled out finally.

Rich leaned forward, cupping his own face in a hand as he stared at Michael dreamily. “Better that than letting a pretty face go to waste, don’t you think?”

Jeremy let out an audible, “Ooh…” As Michael stiffened up, pulling the strings of his hoodie tight to close his hood as much as possible.

Rich cackled at the reaction, looking a little pink himself. He stood up and stretched a hand out to Michael. “Come on!”

Michael fervently shook his head, dead silent.

Rich wasn’t taking no for an answer. He reached forward and grabbed Michael’s hand, pulling him to his feet. Michael was clearly frozen, and if Jeremy weren’t rooting for Rich he would’ve stepped in and told Rich that Michael was uncomfortable and to knock it off. 

After guiding Michael away for a few paces, Rich turned back to Jeremy. “Coming, tallass?”

Jeremy grinned and stood up. He grabbed his tray and Michael’s abandoned sushi and followed behind the two of them, an actual spring in his step for once.

For his indigence, Michael wasn’t putting up much of a fight, keeping his head down as Rich walked him across the cafeteria. They were definitely getting stared at, but Jeremy couldn’t pinpoint why. There were probably 30 reasons for them to garner such attention.

They made it to the table and Dustin smiled at him. He’d scooted down so there were two open spots just for them, and Jeremy sat down next to him giddily. 

Rich guided Michael to the other seat, and he took it.

“Was that so hard?” Rich whispered to him.

Michael responded by whipping his headphones back on and staring down at his hands.

“Hey Headphones-bro!” Jake called from across the table. Michael winced.

“Wow, I don’t get a hello?” Jeremy mumbled.

“Hi babe,” Dustin offered.

“Thank you. Hi.”

Rich had taken his seat next to Jake, and Jeremy noticed that Brooke and Jenna were seated as far away from him as possible. Jeremy couldn’t blame them. Chloe shot Jeremy a look- he could only describe it as “toleration”- before she turned her gaze onto Michael as if he were fresh prey.

The table was silent for a minute until Michael finally looked up, shrinking under everyone’s stares. He cleared his throat and muttered, “Yeah, I’m gonna go…”

“Don’t move,” Chloe ordered. Michael didn’t move.

Then, very slowly and deliberately, she stood up from where she was next to Dustin and walked around the table so she could face him straight on. She dissected him with her eyes, then reached forward and tapped the side of Michael’s headphones with a perfect nail. Jeremy had never seen those headphones come off as quickly as they did in that moment.

Finally, she asked, “What’s your name?”

“... Michael.”   
  
Chloe nodded, eyes narrowing. “Tell me about yourself, Mitchell.” Her voice was deceivingly sweet. Jeremy searched for Dustin’s hand to squeeze on instinct and was glad he wasn’t enduring an interrogation like that.

Michael seemed like he was going to correct her on his name for a moment, but decided against it. “I’m just… here,” He mumbled after a moment.

Chloe’s eyes narrowed. “You don’t say.”

“Look, I’m sorry for intruding, or whatever, but I can go if you want-”

“I don’t want you going anywhere. I want you right here, _Mitchell_.”

“Um, actually, it’s Mich-”

“Don’t care.” Chloe waved him off with a hand. She seemed to pick up on his confusion on the situation and leaned forward until she was whispering in his ear. Jeremy watched Michael bristle at first, but then his eyes went a little wide, surprised. Then a look of understanding dawned on him, which then morphed into a furrowed brow when she pulled away.    
  
“Well, yeah, like… I know people. You’re giving me a lotta credit here…” He whispered to her at last, just loud enough for Jeremy to hear.

Dustin turned to Jeremy, giving him a confused look, but Jeremy paid no mind. He had a pretty good guess of what their conversation was regarding at that point.

“I think it’s justified.” Chloe shrugged. “Besides…” Her eyes traveled from Michael’s face down to his hoodie, as if she was analyzing every patch. Her gaze was more curious than desiring. “For someone so loud, it’s weird that you’re such a nobody.

Michael shifted uncomfortably under her stare. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you’re hot as fuck and you can’t keep it to yourself!” Rich piped up from down the way, to which Chloe delivered a withering glare. Jeremy could’ve sworn he’d heard Dustin hum in agreement.

… They weren’t wrong.

“It _means_ ,” Chloe began as Michael continued to shrink into his hoodie, “That you seem very _interesting_  for a person of your…” She searched for the right word, “ _Status._ "

Michael laughed nervously. “What am I, Jesus?”

“And you’re hot, which is weird.” Dustin reminded, then turned to Jeremy. “I have no idea what’s going on right now.” Neither did Jeremy.

“ _Yes_ , fine, and you’re hot,” Chloe conceded at last. Michael mumbled a disagreement under his breath.

“Where are you going with this?” He asked after a minute.

Chloe went silent. Everyone did as she observed him fully, every line and detail, to the point that even Jeremy felt exposed.

Finally she gave a single, curt nod, and said, “I can work with this.”

“... What?” Michael asked, terrified.

“ _What!?_ ” Dustin shouted incredulously.

“What?” Jeremy inquired, confused.

“I’m going to fix this.” Chloe made a vague gesture at Michael’s entire body.

“Fix?” Michael crossed his arms, oozing uncertainty.

Dustin was still raving. “That’s bullshit! Why is he so interesting all of a sudden!?”

“You and me are gonna become really good friends, Mitchell,” Chloe stated as if they already knew each other inside and out.

“We are?”

Chloe nodded, then, deciding that was enough, returned to her seat as if she _hadn’t_ just terrorized the living hell out of a seventeen year old boy. Jeremy saw Michael physically relax, entire body slumping, and patted him on the shoulder sympathetically.

Dustin turned to Chloe, completely fuming. “Why was that so easy for him? Like- he gets a free pass and I have to sit and struggle over here?”

Chloe gave a not-totally-unpatronizing smile. “Long story. And you were not _struggling-_ ”   
  
“‘Long story’ my ass. Why-” Dustin cut himself off, recognition dawning on him. “Wait. Does this have to do with the play?”

Everyone froze. Jeremy’s heart stopped beating.

Dustin scanned everyone’s faces, finishing on Jeremy’s. His eyes narrowed and he bristled. “Why won’t anyone tell me? What happened?”

Jeremy wasn’t sure exactly who contributed to the brief cacophony of “ _Nothing!_ ” but he knew one of those voices was him.

Chloe and him then engaged in the most intense, silent round of, “you tell him!” “no, _you_ tell him!” ever.

Michael, on the other hand, was laughing. He stared Jeremy down with a withering look of “payback time, asshole,” and before Jeremy could tell him no he’d already said:

“Man, that was a fucking ride.” He pointed directly at Jeremy, “Yo, one day at your and Dustin’s wedding, Christine’s gonna be some sort of in-law and you’ll be technically related and she’ll tell the story of how you almost started the modern apocalypse to get in her pants but somehow ended up with her cousin.”

Dustin turned to Jeremy, expression blank. “I’m sorry, what?”

Jeremy slammed his head into the table, hoping it would make him black out. It didn’t.


	14. In Which Christine Breaks The Rules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> >:(

Now, Dustin had (some) common sense, so when he first heard about the Japanese supercomputer pill, he called bullshit. On the other hand, he was also a drug dealer, and as the tale progressed he vaguely recalled hearing some stories that sounded eerily similar to the experience described. He’d never heard of a squip, of course, but he knew people who sold all sorts of shit. It wasn’t absolutely outrageous.

Which is why it surprisingly didn’t take long to convince him it was real.

To which before Jeremy or anyone else could even b _egin_  the apology segment of the story, Dustin had already grabbed his backpack and sped out of the cafeteria as fast as he could to find his cousin.

The bell rang as he rushed down the hall, which was perfect because it meant he could catch Christine on her way to lunch (Christine had 5B lunch unlike everyone else). The sea of students parted for him, because nobody gets in Dustin Kropp’s way, especially not when he looks like _that._

He caught her on her way out of health class, her face looking unusually emotionless (she’d spent all hour looking at penis diagrams, Dustin found out later, which he laughed at but also sympathized with her for), and grabbed her by the arm.

“Oh- hey!” She started to greet him, “What’s- woah-”

Without allowing her a chance to respond, he dragged her through one of those “staff only” doors that weren’t actually ever used until after school. There was an abrupt stairwell that led to a hall, which led to closets packed with sports stuff and not much else. Had he done a deal down here? Or maybe sex? A deal then sex? Sex then a deal? Separate accounts of sex and/or deals? It bled together after a while.

Christine stumbled down the steps into the hall, and he finally let go of her. She pouted at him and rubbed her arm in mock hurt, but her eyes were worried. Staff-only-hallway-talks were serious business. Something was wrong.

“We’re not supposed to be here!” She chastised in a whisper. This part of the conversation always occurred whenever a staff-only-hallway-talk happened. Because Christine liked rules and order and not spontaneity, and unlike Dustin, her school records were crystal clear and God forbid she’s ten minutes late to class in a school system and society that was already so stupidly rigid.

But that was all in Dustin’s humble yet always correct opinion.

Christine was still frantically ranting on about how he needed to be more careful and how they weren’t supposed to go places _they weren’t supposed to go,_ and, “You need to be to class in like a minute!"

“I’ll skip.”  
  
She crossed her arms, a disappointed mom. “ _Dustin._ "

“Do you know what a squip is?”

That distracted her sufficiently, her eyes popping open. “Oh… gosh… who told you?”

Dustin raised his eyebrows, genuinely surprised. “You do?”

“Yeah… did Jeremy say? Oh gosh, I’m-”

Dustin had managed to shove down his anxiety thus far, but he was losing his composure rapidly and felt it buzzing up inside of him.

“He- he gave you one,” He did his absolute best to watch what he said, because usually when he started talking when he was like this, it never stopped, “And apparently it shocks people and it-”

Christine nodded, unsurprised, and gave him a please-forgive-me smile. “Yeah, I know. I was there, silly…”

Dustin froze.

“You know everything?”  
  
“... Yeah?”

And then he was panicking for real. “What? Why- what- why didn’t you tell me!?”

There was no way Christine intentionally hid that from him. She never hid things from him. There was no way-

“Hey,” Christine whispered, sensing the rise of panic. She rested her hands on his shoulders in an attempt to comfort him, “It’s okay. I’m okay, see?”

Dustin’s hands were nearly shaking at his sides, fidgeting frantically with nothing to hold. His eyes darted rapidly as he continued, “But what if you weren’t? What if- what if- why the _fuck_ didn’t you tell me!?”

Christine flinched as he raised his voice at her, and she struggled to find words of comfort. “I didn’t want you to worry like this- it really doesn’t matter anyway.”

“Doesn’t this seem pretty fucking important to you though!?” He ran a hand through his hair four times in a row, trying to ground himself a little. It wasn’t working. “If you’d gotten hurt- if- if something had _happened_ to you-”

She cut him off, “But it didn’t.”

“But it could have-”

“But it didn’t.” Christine pulled him into a hug because that was her usual way of fixing things and she gave good hugs.

Dustin returned it automatically, finally managing to shut himself up again. He needed to get it together.

They were quiet for a moment. The bell rang.

“I’m sorry… I promise I’m okay. I barely remember it,” Christine softly reassured.

“You should’ve told me.”  
  
“I know. I’m sorry.”

He wasn’t mad at her. Of course he wasn’t. He was just…

“... Dustin, you’re shaking.”

Dustin pulled away from her immediately. “Yeah, sorry.” Deep breath. “Sorry for freaking out on you.”

Christine was frowning, clearly not having it. “It’s okay. And it’s okay to be sc-"

“I’m _not._ ” He looked at her pointedly. It was left unsaid."

She pouted- except clearly more serious- and crossed her arms, flatly telling him, “I don’t like it when you’re like this.”

Great. She was upset. Nice going. 

Christine was a hard person to be mad at either way, even without feeling crushing guilt. He softened a little and stared off to the side at the tiles lining the ground. “Sorry.”

Another pause. Anxious. Both of them couldn’t stand silence.

Christine broke it first. “Please don’t kill him, okay?”

How many times had she said something like that to him before? “Who?”

“Jeremy. It wasn’t his fault. He wasn’t in control of himself.”

Jeremy? What about Jeremy?  
  
Oh. Yeah. He hadn’t even thought about that.

He was expecting himself to feel angry, but he wasn’t. It was weird. When Rich had prefaced the beginning of the story with, “This is going to be the weirdest shit you’ve heard in your entire life,” he hadn’t been joking.

' _It wasn’t his fault.'_

Whose was it? Jeremy’s for drugging everyone? Rich’s for telling him about it? Chloe and Rich and Jenna and everyone else’s for being a dick to Jeremy? Michael’s for _whatever_ was happening between them?

Dustin usually didn’t make blame complicated. If you did something bad, you were an asshole and it was on you to either fix or die or something. That was the most effective way of looking at it.

But suddenly, bringing all of his friends, his boyfriend, his _cousin_ into it made it so much more complex. A chessboard of who-said-what.

Grimly he realized it wasn’t up to him to place blame. It wasn’t his story. He had no idea until five minutes ago that it had even happened. 

There was probably no point in even worrying. Everyone had come out fine and unscarred.

Except for Rich.

Hm.

So Dustin wasn’t mad.

“... He liked you.”  
  
Mildly crestfallen? Perhaps.

Christine seemed surprised at his quiet tone. “Um… yeah, I guess.”

Dustin didn’t know how to respond to that. Who the fuck would?

“Oh!” Christine blurted, as if she understood, “I turned him down, obviously. I didn’t like him back, I swear! Still don’t.”

That was hardly comforting.

“So he settled for me instead.” He laughed, “Second best in the Canigula family?”

(He played it off as a joke. It wasn’t. Spending five minutes in a room with Christine and him would be enough to give someone a preference.)

She laughed a little but fervently shook her head. “No! He’s in love with you.”

“He did it with Brooke. Why not me?”

“What? Did what? To get with me?”

Dustin nodded.

“Uh, because Jeremy and I are friends now and dating each other would be totally weird.” She shrugged as if it were obvious. “Besides, you should see the way he looks at you.”

Dustin did. Jeremy was obvious as hell.

“And how he talks about you,” She added.

Selfishly Dustin asked, “What does he say?”

“Oh gosh, where do I start?” She paused in thought for a moment, then her face scrunched up, “Usually he talks about what you wear and then gets really quiet and… like… _excited._ ” On that word, her voice lowered to a barely audible whisper as if she’d said the most sexual, scandalous thing in the world. Dustin stifled a chuckle.

She continued, “But! He also thinks it's cute when you ramble, and he thinks you’re really really smart. He talks about your eyes a lot…” She shrugged, “I dunno! He just likes you! Ask him yourself!”

Dustin wasn’t blushing, of course not. Nope.

Stupidly he asked, “... Really?”  
  
“Yes!” Christine rolled her eyes, properly smiling now, and insisted, “He really likes you. Trust me, I can tell these things.”

Dustin went silent. It was stupid to think that Jeremy didn’t like him. They were dating.

And yet.

“Thank you,” He said. Then, “Sorry. For… yeah.”

Christine patted him on the arm. “No problem. I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

Dustin wouldn’t say he felt normal, or anything, but he felt better than he did five minutes ago.

Christine was bouncing on her feet, clearly waiting to be dismissed so she could go to lunch and eat something. Dustin took pity on her.

“I’ll text you later, ok?” He promised. “Sorry, I’m still just kinda… trying to wrap my head around this, I guess.”  
  
She nodded. “Me too, don’t worry.” Then she turned away and headed for the stairs. She paused and turned back to him, and Dustin expected a goodbye.

Instead, she asked, “Hey, so, to clarify, you’re _not_ killing Jeremy, right?”

Dustin smiled for the first time since they’d started talking. “Nah. Not yet.” 

* * *

 

Jeremy was, of course, absolutely terrified of what Dustin was going to say to him. Or do to him, because if Jeremy were Dustin he’d be forming a hit list at the moment.

However, his nerves were beaten only by one other overarching feeling: Rage.

He’d stayed quiet throughout the day, but as soon as Michael gave him a ride to his house and they were safely in the basement where Michael’s moms couldn’t hear, Jeremy shot him a glare and a “What the fuck!?”

Michael, hand halfway in his weed drawer like a kid with a hand in the cookie jar, turned to him with a confused, wide-eyed expression. “Um… what?”

“What- why- what-” Jeremy frantically tried to collect his thoughts, taking a seat on the nearest beanbag, “What the fuck do you think gave you the right to _say_ that? That’s something I should tell him on my own time!”  
  
“Say what?” Michael asked, still clearly confused.

Jeremy scoffed and crossed his arms, irritation itching his veins. “Don’t pretend that you don’t know. The squip thing.”  
  
Michael, after realizing, had the audacity to smile and chuckle. “Oh yeah. Well, you were never gonna tell him, so-”

“So that gives _you_ the right to do that?”  
  
Michael’s smile faltered. He stopped rummaging around in his drawer and plopped down on the floor, arms crossed. “Are you seriously mad right now?”

 “Uh, yes!” Jeremy laughed, nearly hysterical, “ _Finally_ I have a boyfriend who likes me for me, and a lot more friends, and then you go and _say that_ , and now it’s gonna be ruined!”  
  
“Oh yeah, because it’s all about you, I forgot,” Michael bit back, rolling his eyes and looking away. 

“That’s not-” Jeremy sighed, eyes closing as he ran a hand through his hair. His fingers caught in the locks and tugged a little harshly. “That’s not what I meant. You know that’s not what I meant.”

“Really?” Michael scoffed. His fingers went up to the strings of his hoodie and he started twisting them around each digit and pulling, the hoodie scrunching up at his neck. “Because- because that’s what it’s seemed like recently.” 

“Oh yeah, I want to _eat at another table_ for once and suddenly it’s as bad as the apocalypse?”

 “Without me.”

 Fresh indigence flowed through Jeremy. His hand came down and sharply hit his own knee, and Michael’s gaze shot up at the resounding _smack._

“I told you you were invited! I _asked_ if you wanted to come! And then when you said no I stayed with you!” 

“Oh, so I’m a ball and chain now.”

 “You’re acting like one!”

Jeremy hardly realized what had come out of his mouth until Michael visibly paled. That had definitely been too far, but before he could begin to apologize, Michael mumbled something indiscernible. Jeremy asked, “What?”

“Why am I not good enough for you!?” Michael repeated, nearly a shout, “Why do you want to get rid of me?”

Jeremy felt his stomach sink. “Michael, I don’t-”

 “Look, I know I’m basically pathetic compared to them but I try _so_ fucking hard for you. I try so hard to make you happy. I don’t-” He was visibly getting choked up as he continued, “I don’t want you to leave. So what the fuck am I doing wrong?” 

The strings of Michael’s hood were practically knotted from the tangling, strangling his fingers in a desperate cat’s cradle. Jeremy was silent, stunned. 

Slowly he scooted off the bean bag and crawled across the floor until he was next to Michael, back to the wall. “You’re not pathetic. I thought you liked being a loser.”

Michael laughed bitterly, eyes pooling with frustrated tears. “ _Liked_ it? I hate it. I only said that so you would feel better about yourself. And to make excuses for myself.” He slowly let the strings go, and they fell and dangled like crumpled streamers at his chest. He used a sleeve to wipe at his nose as he continued, “I don’t think getting pushed into lockers is fun. I don’t think getting called slurs is fun. I just think it’s better than being like _them._ Because, shit, look at them. I couldn’t handle that pressure. I couldn’t handle not being… me.”

They were both appropriately quiet as Jeremy allowed that to sink in.

 “So,” Michael went on, “I go with the less of the evils. I guess it’s better to be hurt somewhere that’s familiar than somewhere that’s… socially better? I don’t know. You wouldn’t get it.”

Jeremy was going to say he did, but honestly, “Yeah. I don’t.”  
  
Michael chuckled, but it was sad. “Figures.” He shrugged and swallowed, “I guess it just feels safer. And… being with you feels safer than being… without you, I guess.”

It sort of made sense, although Jeremy definitely didn’t feel the same way. And he was still upset beyond belief as he quietly muttered, “I know, and I get it, but you’re being an ass about it.”  
  
Michael looked up at him through fogged glasses.

“I’m not gonna leave you again, and I know I promised I’d make up for last time, but… you’re acting like I can’t talk to anyone besides you.”  
  
“I’m not…” Michael insisted, though the way his voice trailed off confirmed that he was starting to agree.

“I just… I don’t like me. I want to change who I am.”  
  
Michael stiffened next to him, and Jeremy quickly added, “But not- not like that. I wanna be able to wear cardigans and play video games and listen to your boring rants-”

“They’re not boring. Everything I say is interesting.” Michael insisted, a trace of a smile gracing his features. 

Jeremy went on, “I want to be able to not wear Eminem shirts and-” 

“And get to masturbate?” Michael offered.

“Yea- _No!_ ” Jeremy blurted as he realized what he’d just said, his face going entirely red. But it made Michael laugh a little, which felt good.

 He cleared his throat. “That’s- I don’t want to change that. And I don’t want to change being with you.”

For a moment Michael seemed a little more relaxed, just barely smiling. Then his eyes went cloudy again. “But…?”

Yes, but. “But… I want to change myself in like… doing more. I wanna go out and do more things. I want to figure out how to _talk_ to people normally. I wanna kiss my boyfriend a lot. I want…” Jeremy grimaced as he said it, already knowing that it wouldn’t be well received, “I want to have more than one friend.” 

And that was where they differed most, Jeremy knew, as Michael deflated. He curled in on himself, nearly tearing up again as though it were the beginning of the end.

“And… honestly, I think you should try to have more than one friend too. You shouldn’t only have… me…” Jeremy calmly suggested.

Michael looked hardly comforted, and Jeremy sighed, resting a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, no matter how many friends I have though, you’re still gonna always be my best friend. Nobody could replace you.”

Michael tried to smile but it was clearly forced. Jeremy’s face fell into something more serious as he said, “You don’t seriously think you can just like… have me all to yourself, man.”

“No! I- I know. Of course not. I just…” Michael took a deep breath and stared at the floor, rubbing the toes of his shoes together. “This is weird. I don’t like it when things change.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I just… d- do you get where I’m coming from here?”

 Michael nodded, gaze distant.  

They sat, staring out into the dim basement. After a minute Michael sighed and leaned his head on Jeremy’s shoulder. “I’m sorry for being pushy and stupid. And for telling Dustin about the squip,” He apologized, voice small. 

“It’s okay,” Jeremy said, tone equally as quiet, “I’m sorry for yelling. And I swear I’m not gonna leave you again.”  
  
“I know. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

The anger was gone and Jeremy was starting to once again become nervous from the situation with Dustin. The radio silence. He’d nearly forgotten what they’d started fighting about in the first place.

 Again they stayed like that for a minute until Michael piped up, “Hey, if Dustin kills you, I’ll donate your body to science.”

Jeremy huffed and rolled his eyes. “After all that I kinda hoped you’d say you’d take the bullet for me, but whatever.” 

“He hasn’t said anything?”

Jeremy hesitated. “No.” 

“I’m scared for you, dude.”

“No shit,” Jeremy mumbled. He found himself balling the sleeves of his cardigan in his hands as he thought of all the worst-case scenarios. Getting broken up with? Beaten up for hurting everyone? Would Dustin do that to him? Of course not, Dustin was nice and Jeremy was stupid to believe all those rumors. Still, though Michael was joking when he mentioned Dustin killing him, Jeremy couldn’t help but wonder…

 Michael must have noticed Jeremy getting lost in scared thought, and straightened up with a reassuring, slightly cheeky smile. “Hey, I have an idea to take your mind off it.”

 Jeremy had a feeling he already knew. “What?”

“Wanna get high?”

“Absolutely.”


	15. In Which Brooke Drinks LaCroix

**dustin <3**

 

_hey_

 

_oh my fucking god you responded_

_hi fuck im so sorry_

 

_its cool_

 

_are you mad??_

_you totally are that was totally  
passive agressive oh fuck _

 

_it wasn’t meant to be_

 

_oh_

_wait_

_seriously?_

_youre not mad??_

 

_a little_

_but like its all cool_

 

_seriously?_

 

_yeah_

_but_

_if you hurt christine again_

_i will dislocate your jaw._

 

_understood._

_im so fucking sorry i wanted_  
_to tell you i swear i just didn’t_  
_want it to be right away and_  
_make you weirded out or_  
_something_

_im so fucking sorry dustin_

 

_i’d be apologizing to brooke  
right now. _

 

_you’re totally pissed at me  
i can tell fuck im sorry _

 

_im not_

_stop typing._

_im literally fine_

_you have way more to worry  
about than i do right now _

_this all hardly involves me_

_and if i were you id probably_  
_be working on fixing what i_  
_fucked up_

_i am i promise_

 

_i know_

_just smth to think about_

 

_yeah_

_im sorry_

_thank you_

 

_can i ask one more thing  
about it though? _

 

_of course_

 

_did you actually purposely  
cheat on brooke with chloe? _

 

_no._

 

_i thought so_

_what happened then?_

 

_i_

_im not ready to talk about  
that. _

_im sorry._

 

_oh_

 

_i will eventually just_

_not now._

 

_ok._

_are you ok?_

 

_yeah_

 

Jeremy really wasn’t, but he wasn’t going to say that, of course. Though, the fact that Dustin had thought to ask, especially after everything he’d just found out?

‘ _i love you,_ ’ Jeremy typed into the tiny box before frantically deleting it. Dropping the L Bomb over text? After all that? Was he stupid?

Did he mean it? Was he just relieved that he wasn’t getting broken up with and wasn’t getting a broken jaw?

The conversation died off from there. It was too late on a school night to be awake, anyways. God knew he’d need sleep before facing school, facing Dustin _in person_ the next day.

He would’ve slept fine, if not for the nightmares that plagued him and forced him awake in a cold sweat. It just wasn’t his day, it seemed.

* * *

Jeremy was the second one at the new lunch table that day, which was weird.

Of course, Brooke was the first. She sat by herself, face neutral and legs crossed as she stared down at her phone. Her blonde hair hung past her face like a curtain. She didn’t notice him right away.

Jeremy swallowed nervously and took his seat, trying to make himself as small as possible. He stayed quiet, waiting for everyone else to arrive. After five minutes when it was still just the two of them sitting there, he began to realize something was up. He hadn’t gone to the wrong table, had he? Brooke was there, so this had to be right.

He risked a glance at her and she was looking up from her phone now, clearly just as confused as he was.

Oh God, he was gonna have to talk to her.

Jeremy cleared his throat, fingers fidgeting with the cuffs of his sleeves, and asked, “Hey- uh, do… do you know where everyone is?”

Finally, she looked at him. Thankfully she still seemed more confused than angry at that moment. “No…” She replied.

“... Weird.”

“Yeah.”

The conversation went painfully dead.

They were alone and it didn’t seem as if anyone else was coming anytime soon. He had to talk to her now, he realized. But Jeremy honestly would rather eat a box of nails than do that.

In the back of his mind though was Dustin’s text from the night prior. He was right, Jeremy _should_ apologize to Brooke. He _should_ be fixing and taking accountability for the mistakes he made. He couldn't run from everything forever.

So he took a deep breath and said, “Hey… um… Brooke?”

She looked back to him but somehow manage to read through his expression. Her eyes narrowed to deadly pinpricks. “What.”

Jeremy’s dick retracted into his body out of fear. And he’d thought _Chloe_ was the scary one.

“I… um… well, I wanted to apologize for everything that happened with the squip. It wasn’t fair to you.”

“No shit.”

Jeremy swallowed nervously, voice wavering as he forced himself to continue. “I’m sorry for using you like that.”

Brooke stared daggers into her phone, frantically scrolling as if to pretend she was only half-listening. “No, it’s fine! I’m used to it. ‘Brooke’s just a way to get to Chloe,’ or, ‘Brooke’s just a way to get to Madeline,’ or, ‘Brooke’s just a way to get to Christine or whoever the hell you want because she’s easy like that and there’s nowhere to go but up from her!’” She laughed, detested. “I don’t know why I thought you were different.”

Jeremy’s heart ached awfully and he wanted nothing more than to reach out and pull her into a hug. “Oh, Brooke… I’m sorry…” 

She was clearly tearing up, sniffling as she shook her head and said, “Whatever. Boys are stupid.”

Jeremy nearly agreed with her. “I know it doesn’t help but… You deserve better.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t help. I’ll pretend I haven’t heard that a million times.” She wiped her nose on the sleeve of her cardigan and looked up to him again, shutting her phone off. “You want to know how you can help me? Tell me what’s wrong with me.”  
  
“... What?”

“What’s wrong with me? Why am I always the one who gets cheated on? What am I doing wrong? Like… boys ask me out all the time but they never stay or anything. Am I weird? Do I push them away? Is it because I’m _second_ prettiest?” Tears were freely flowing down her cheeks at that point, her stare never leaving him. “Well!?” She nearly shouted, “What is it!?”

Jeremy was at a loss for words for a solid minute. He knew Brooke was sensitive, but he hadn’t been prepared for something on this level.

As he stared into her desperate eyes, he was reminded of his conversation with Michael from the night before. What she was demanding was almost similar to what he had. “ _Why am I not good enough for you,_ ” he’d asked.

“Maybe you’re not…” Jeremy started, trying to think, “Maybe there’s nothing wrong with you. Maybe there’s something wrong with the people you date.” At the end, he dared to slip in, “Maybe there’s something wrong with your friends.”

Brooke sniffled and asked, “What do you mean?”  
  
If Jeremy didn’t value his life, he would’ve brought up Chloe. But he didn’t particularly feel like dying, so he stuttered out, “Uh, I mean that… Uh… well…” He tried to figure out a way to explain and came up with, “When I had my squip… the whole reason the cast got drugged because it told me that I was doing everything right and… and that ‘the fault was in my peers.’ I guess there’s only so much you can do about other people and how they perceive you."

She thought about it for a minute but clearly still looked doubtful, so Jeremy continued, “Because there’s nothing wrong with you Brooke. You’re sweet and nice and gentle, and… and honestly, the whole ‘second prettiest’ thing is bullshit. You’re prettier than Chloe.”  
  
Brooke honest to God laughed at him. “Now you’re just saying that because you feel bad.”  
  
Jeremy shook his head, completely honest. “I’m not. Because you’re not like her. You’re pretty on the inside, too. And,” fuck it, “and it’s her fault for making you feel like you’re not. And it’s every other asshole guy’s fault for making you feel like you’re not. Mine too. Because you’re really amazing. There’s nothing wrong with you.”

Brooke seemed a little shocked, silent for a moment. Then she shuddered and began to full-on mascara-running _weep._

Jeremy instantly panicked and tried to backtrack, “Shit- was it something I said? I’m sorry-”  
  
“No- it’s just- that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me…”

“O- oh. Well, um, yeah.”

Brooke reached into her backpack and pulled out a box of tissues, grabbing a couple and wiping her eyes. Jeremy looked away as she pulled herself together as though he’d walked in on her while she was changing.

“Maybe you’re right,” She said after a minute. Jeremy turned back to her. “Maybe I… I dunno. I just try and be so nice to everyone and they-”

“I know,” Jeremy cut her off, “I’m sorry.”

“... Can I be honest with you?”

She’d practically poured her heart out and there was still _more?_ “Yeah, of course.”  
  
Brooke seemed thoughtful for a moment, and then quietly admitted, “If I’d known what a squip was, and known it wouldn’t like… possess me and everyone, I totally woulda gotten one.” She tensed and looked away from him, a bright blush covering her cheeks. “That’s pretty pathetic, huh?”

Jeremy guffawed, “Pathetic? I’m the one who _did_ get one. I don’t blame you at all.”  
  
“I just wish it was that easy to fix everything.” She laughed and stared down at the table. “Of course the easiest girl in the school would be the one to say that.”

Jeremy winced and offered, “I guess… that’s the thing to work on first?”

“I guess, yeah. You’re right.”

Michael popped into Jeremy’s head again as he marveled over his sudden ability to therapist people. 

Wait. Michael’s need to get out more. Brooke’s need to find reliable people. It clicked.

“Hey,” Jeremy blurted, “You know my friend Michael?”

Brooke looked back to him with red eyes. “Who?”  
  
“Michael, the… the guy with the red hoodie? Chloe calls him Mitchell?”

Her eyes widened in recognition and she nodded. “Yeah, what about him?”  
  
“You and him should hang out sometime! You two would get along, I think.”  
  
Brooke blinked at him, then laughed- a real laugh this time. “Jeremy, are you seriously trying to set me up with your best friend?”

“Wh- _no!_ Michael’s gay!” Jeremy blurted.

“Oh, he is?” Brooke looked almost a little disappointment. “We speculated, with the patch and stuff, but we weren’t sure. I’ll have to tell Chloe.” She shook her head and clicked her tongue. “Shame. He’s actually kinda cute.”

Jeremy pretended he hadn’t heard that. “I meant as _friends._ You two both could use a really good friend right now, I think.”

Brooke seemed to consider it, then nodded. “Well, Chloe’s gonna make him her new project anyway, so it’s kinda inevitable. I’ll ask him to hang out sometime.”

"Good!" Jeremy nodded, but then caught onto the second half. “Wait, what do you mean, ‘make him her new project?’”

Brooke smiled. Jeremy was relieved that the topic seemed relatively behind them. “Chloe has a knack for taking nerdy boys and turning them into sex machines. See: your boyfriend.”

Jeremy nearly choked. “What?”

“Yeah. You should ask him about it sometime.” Then she shrugged and took a sip from her LaCroix.

Dustin? A nerd? Well, Jeremy already knew that much, but Dustin _not in leather jackets?_ It had to be fake news.

He cleared his head of the thought and coughed awkwardly. “Hey…” He had a feeling all was good, but he just wanted to be sure. “Um… we cool?”

Brooke looked to him, then broke out into a wide, genuine smile. “We are. Thank you, Jeremy. You’re such a sweetheart.”

“Oh!” Jeremy scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, “Yeah, don’t mention it.”

“The world needs more boys like you. At least you learn when you fuck up.”  
  
“Yeah…”

She seemed to study him for a moment. Then she set down her LaCroix can with a _clang_ and leaned forward towards him, resting her face in a hand with a lazy smile. “Hey… if you and Dustin ever break up, we should hang sometime.”

Jeremy wasn’t sure he’d heard her correctly at first. He stuttered out, “H- hang?”

In a sugary tone, she giggled, “ _Oui._ You’re still really cute.”

Sure he was as red as a tomato, Jeremy was about incomprehensible. “Wh- uh- I- thanks?”

Then she laughed loudly, throwing her head back as if it was all just a joke. And Jeremy told himself to relax- because it definitely was. But then she glanced back at him and added, “Especially when you blush.”

Nevermind. “ _I’m-_ ”

A hand slammed down next to Jeremy and he yelped like a kicked dog. “We’re _here!_ ” Dustin announced, loud enough for half of the school to hear.

“Oh, good! Where have you guys been?” Brooke asked as Jenna filed in next to her.

When Dustin spoke he seemed tense, Jeremy noticed, his words short and sharp. “We accidentally got lost on the way here long enough for you two to talk.”

Jeremy nearly gasped, utterly betrayed. “You _planned_ that?”

“Maybe. Thought it would be good for you two to reacquaint yourselves.” He shot a pointed glare to Brooke, who only began to laugh along with Chloe, who was clearly enjoying the display. “Looks like you did more than I thought you would accomplish.”

Jeremy was at a loss. He was also mildly terrified. “I- I-”

Brooke pouted at him, clearly unbothered by his stare. “Aw come on, Dusty. It was just a joke.”

“Uh-huh.” His arm came to wrap tightly around Jeremy’s waist, pressing the two of them together. Jeremy would be lying if he said his heart didn’t jump and his face felt even warmer than before.

“Shut up sluts, Jake’s got an announcement,” Rich interrupted. At this, Jenna seemed to perk up from where she was sitting and pull out her phone.

Jake formally cleared his throat and, once he had everyone’s attention, stated, “I’m throwing a Christmas party later this month, and you’re all invited.”  
  
“I’m Jewish,” Jeremy blurted. All eyes turned on him.

After an awkward pause, Jake made a flawless recovery. “Oh, shit bro- sorry. Uh, I’m throwing an all-inclusive holiday party later this month, and you’re all invited.”

Michael, who had quietly sat down next to Jeremy, immediately blurted, “I can’t go. Sorry.”  
  
Jake raised an eyebrow. “Woah, what? That blows. Why not? I literally just announced it, dude. What days can't you make it? I can always reschedule-”  
  
“I’m-” Michael’s eyes widened in panic, “I’m, um… busy all this month. Couldn’t make it a single day. Sorry.”

It was an obvious lie. Michael clearly just didn’t want to go and was trying to be polite. Jeremy sighed, disappointed.

Jake either figured this out and took pity on him or just was genuinely that dumb. Either way, he gave Michael a gentle smile. “If you say so. But um… you’re always welcome to hang out with us, dude.”

“Yeah, ok,” Michael mumbled, brushing him off and putting his headphones on. Jeremy was dismayed, Jake too, but he changed the subject quickly.

Instead, Jake turned to Dustin with a sheepish, but charming smile. “Hey… so Dustin…” 

“Yeah yeah, just text me what you need,” Dustin sighed. He almost sounded… annoyed? Tired?

Jeremy looked between the two of them, confused at the exchange until Rich made eye contact with him and mouthed, “ _Drugs._ ” Ah. Of course.

Dustin turned to Jeremy and, on a brighter note, asked, “Be my plus one?”

Jeremy instantly nodded. “Ye- yeah! Totally!”  
  
“Aww, no fair,” Chloe complained from down the way, giggling with faux maliciousness, “Brooke was just about to ask him.”

Brooke cackled and smacked her arm as Dustin’s grip tightened around Jeremy’s waist (and Jeremy turned redder still), and Jeremy was glad he was pressed next to Dustin’s side and not on the receiving end of his current murderous glare.

As he sat there, surrounded by those people who once seemed so untouchable but were now decidedly his friends, invited to a _Jake Dillinger party,_ boyfriend holding onto him, Jeremy realized that it was really all happening. His life was turning out- no best friends shed along the way. For once, things were finally looking to be on the upside.

Jeremy found Dustin’s hand, laced their fingers together, and smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaah this came out a day later than i intended it to. I'm sorry :(
> 
> In other news, this will be the last chapter posted until December. I hope you'll excuse my brief hiatus as I work on other, personal projects. Until then!


	16. In Which Everyone Gets Super Drunk (AKA The Mandatory Party Chapter)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please drink responsibly and only if you're of the legal age in your country

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning: you might wanna sit down for this one because this is a LONG fucker to read.

“You know you’re invited, right?”

At some point Dustin had unbuckled from the backseat of the car and was practically sitting on top of the cupholder dividing the two front seats, providing commentary much to Michael’s chagrin.

Dustin continued as Michael took a right turn, entering a subdivision that seemed way too calm for the party about to happen there. “Nobody’s stopping you from coming.”

Michael shrugged. “I’m busy tonight. And designated driver, so I can’t get drunk with you.”

Dustin paused for a moment. “Okay, you know that ‘I’m busy’ and ‘I’m designated driver’ literally conflict with each other, right?”

From where Jeremy was in the passenger’s seat, he gave Dustin a little warning nudge with his elbow. All he asked was that they make it through one drive in peace.

Michael’s patience was clearly waning, his knuckles white as he gripped the steering wheel. “Yes. I’m busy for most the night but when you guys need to be picked up, I’ll be there.”

For a moment, Jeremy thought Dustin was going to let it go, but then he smirked. Smirks were a bad sign. Jeremy quickly turned to look out the window instead of watching the impending bloodbath. The houses were flying by, and Jeremy could just barely catch a glimpse of Christmas lights every now and then. They were going by so fast, in fact, that Jeremy almost began to panic. There was no way this was the neighborhood speed limit.

Sure enough, Dustin continued, “That’s fine. We’ll have fun and you can sit in your house and avoid the ridiculous sexual tension you and Rich have-”

The car slammed to a sudden stop, tires screeching as Jeremy’s head smacked into the headrest hard enough to concuss him. Next to him, Dustin yelped as he flew into the back seat with a _thunk._

Jeremy frantically turned to Michael, adrenaline and dizziness making him panic, and found that Michael was hardly disturbed at all. “What- why!?”

“What the fuck, dude!?” Dustin complained from the back.

Completely deadpan, Michael said, “Oops. A squirrel ran in front of me.”

Jeremy forced a deep breath out and whispered, “I hate you,” to Michael as he turned to check that Dustin was alright. He didn’t look any worse for wear, if not for the furious look on his face. “You’re an asshole.”  
  
Michael ignored him. “This is your stop.”

Jeremy glanced out the window. They were idled in front of what could pass for a haunted house, lights out and all. He turned back to Michael. “Are you sure?”

“This isn’t Brooke’s house,” Dustin chimed in.

The party was being held at Brooke’s house, par her volunteering, as Jake didn’t exactly have the space to throw a party himself.

“Close enough. Get out,” Michael demanded.

Jeremy groaned and begged, “Michael, please.”

Michael had no mercy, simply reaching over Jeremy to pop open the car door for him, and then giving him a look. “I’ll be there at one. Text me if you need anything.”  
  
Begrudgingly, Jeremy and Dustin slid out of the car. The moment the doors closed, Michael drove off without even pausing to wave.

“Do you know where we’re going?” Jeremy asked, turning to Dustin.

“Yeah.”

Dustin slung his backpack on (when Jeremy had asked him why he had it, Dustin had changed the subject), and took Jeremy’s hand. They briskly walked down the sidewalk; it was too cold to loiter.

“Sorry,” Dustin said after a minute.

“Huh? Oh, no. It’s fine. Sorry Michael’s… acting like he is.”

Dustin sort of shrugged. “He just needs to get over himself.”

“He’s working on it,” Jeremy quietly promised, “but it doesn’t help him when you push him.”

“But-”

Jeremy lightly knocked him in the ribs, chastising. “Behave.”

Dustin mumbled something irritated sounding, but gave up arguing and merely pressed closer to Jeremy’s side.

Michael hadn’t dropped them too far away after all. After a couple of minutes, they rounded a corner and saw a large house, lights all on and obvious music playing. Jeremy couldn’t help feeling a little daunted. He squeezed Dustin’s hand and turned to him. “Ready?”

For a moment, Dustin almost seemed hesitant, lacking a response. But then he smirked and said, “Always, freckles.”

Jeremy’s stomach did a little leap as they walked up the steps. He knocked on the door and took a deep breath.

“Did... did you just knock?” Dustin asked.

“Uh, yeah?”

“Freckles, it’s a party. You just… go in.”

“Oh.”

Face going warm in embarrassment, Jeremy ignored Dustin’s chuckles and opened the door. 

The moment he stepped in, the atmosphere changed. He was smacked in the face with an uncomfortable humidity. The thumping bass of a Kesha song grew suddenly loud and drowning, and the murmur of talking and people he could barely make out was enough to fill him with immediate stress.

Dustin stepped in beside him. They stood inside a small foyer, which clearly wasn’t an exciting place to be because nobody but them was in there.

“I’m… going to get lost,” Jeremy predicted. 

Dustin smiled at him almost apologetically. “Yeah, I hate to tell you this, but I’m gonna have to dip for a couple minutes. You’re gonna be on your own for a bit.”  
  
Jeremy’s panic grew tenfold. “What? Why!?”

“It’s just gonna be for a second. Brooke and Chloe and everyone else is probably around, so just… find one of them.” Without giving Jeremy a second to breathe, he started pulling him closer to the sound of people and music. Jeremy physically dug his heels into the ground and regret why he ever thought it was a good idea to come.

“Can’t I come with you?” He nearly begged.

“Uh…” Dustin glanced to the side, “I mean… I guess...” But the way he refused to meet Jeremy’s eyes, almost guiltily, and the way he suddenly switched to being so physically closed off screamed, “I’d seriously rather you not.”

So Jeremy pushed his nerves away and forced a watery smile. “Nevermind. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, totally.”  
  
“... Okay. Sorry.”  
  
They rounded a corner and before Jeremy could assure him that it was fine, there were a hundred eyes on them.

The reaction from the crowd was immediate. Several cries of, “Dustin!”, a thousand taps on the shoulders and “What?”’s and “He’s here,”’s, and a couple “Finally”’s. 

Dustin seemed to ignore every one of them, and Jeremy figured he was used to that treatment, but then he started squeezing Jeremy’s hand so tightly it almost hurt. 

Jeremy was admittedly relieved that the attention was mostly on Dustin and not on him. “Guess they’ve been waiting for you?”  
  
“Yeah,” Dustin replied, voice stiff.

From the back of the crowd, Jake waved to both of them (which was easy to see, because jake was nearly the tallest person in the room). Dustin apparently took this as a cue, releasing his death grip on Jeremy’s hand with a, “I’ll be right back,” before disappearing into the crowd.

And Jeremy was alone.

Everyone went back to their own personal bubbles after that, thankfully, so Jeremy didn’t have to deal with being the center of attention. Unfortunately, Jeremy had no idea where anyone was and that meant he had to find his own way around.

He did his best to scan the room, but he couldn’t see a single person and had to resort to nearly clinging to the wall as he walked into the mass of sweating teenagers. It was hard to breathe.

Ending up next to an expensive-looking vase, Jeremy sort of tried to pretend he was a painting as he pressed himself into the wall. Except he was a very sweaty, stressed painting. He marveled and envied how it had been so easy for him at the Halloween party when he hadn’t had an issue striking up a conversation with anyone.

And then, like the voice of an angel: “ _Jeremy!_ ”

Jeremy turned to face a bouncy, excited Brooke with Jenna trailing just behind. She threw her arms around him and squeezed. “We weren’t sure you would make it!”  
  
He awkwardly patted her back, still unsure how to react to pretty girls hugging him, but insanely relieved nonetheless. “Uh, good to see you too!?”

“I heard Dustin is here?” Jenna asked.

“Um, yeah, but he kinda ran off on me.”  
  
Brooke released him and waved him off with a hand. “He’s probably with Jake setting up.”

Jeremy had no idea what that meant. “Huh?”

“Are you okay? You look kinda flushed,” Jenna commented, and Jeremy felt even more humiliated because it really was that obvious.

“You need a drink!” Brooke exclaimed.

“We all do,” Jenna mumbled, pulling out her phone and tapping something on it. Jeremy had never felt so lost in a conversation.

As if on cue, Jeremy felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned to see Dustin holding a solo cup out to him. “Hi.”  
  
“You found me!” Jeremy exclaimed, most of the anxiety draining out of him.

“I found you!” Dustin pushed the cup into Jeremy’s hand before taking a long drink out of his own.

“What is this?” It was hard to discern the color of the drink in the inconsistent lighting, but it smelled unpleasantly sharp.

“I turned around for two seconds and when I turned back Jake gave it to me, so I have no idea. It tastes awful,” Dustin said, then proceeded to take another drink out of it without flinching. 

“And you didn’t get me one!?” Brooke chastised lightly.

“I didn’t know you wanted one!” Dustin insisted. Then he grinned and had the audacity to say, “Get _Lohst_ _._ ”  
  
Brooke’s face went perfectly blank for a moment, clearly regretting her entire existence. But then she returned with an equally evil and sarcastic grin. “I like it _Heere_ _,_ thank you very much.” She jabbed Jeremy in the side lightly as she giggled. Jeremy stared down at his possibly poisoned drink and prayed it would kill him when he drank it.

Jenna voiced his thoughts perfectly. “Jesus, shut up.”

“I go by Dustin, actually.”

A new voice chimed in and a shadow fell over all of them. “I love you two so much, but for the love of God please stop.”

Her six-inch heels pushed Chloe far past the six-foot mark, letting her loom over all of them like an ethereal, skimpy goddess. She was clearly sober, so Jeremy didn’t have much to worry about. In fact, he was nearly relieved at her much-needed interruption.

Dustin pouted at her. “Babe, this is important.”

“Literally die,” Chloe ordered.

Brooke huffed, “Let us have fun, Chlo.”

“Yeah, let us have fun, _Chlo_ ,” Said Dustin before taking another sip of his drink. Jeremy was still mustering the courage to do the same.

Without batting an eye, Chloe grabbed Dustin’s cup out of his hand and took a long, slow gulp.

“Wow,” Said he.

She immediately handed it back to him, brow furrowing. “Oh shit, that’s awful.”

Jeremy let out a strangled noise and begged himself to just drink the fucking booze already.

Unfortunately, it had the side effect of Chloe looking at him. “You good, Jerry?”

Shit. “Uh, um, yeah! Just… not used to parties.”  
  
Thankfully she didn’t judge him, just said, “Makes sense. By the way, where’s Mitchell?”  
  
“Uh, he said he couldn’t come, remember?”  
  
Chloe frowned. “Oh that won’t do.”  
  
“Wha-?”  
  
“One, that’s lame. Two, he can’t avoid his and Rich’s sexual tension _forever_.”  
  
“Thank you!” Dustin exclaimed as he finished off his cup, crushed it, and tossed it behind him like a newlywed wife tossing a bouquet. He caught Brooke’s eye and smiled sheepishly.

“Not in my house. Pick it up,” she ordered, and Dustin scurried off to find his litter like a guilty dog.

Chloe turned to Brooke. “That reminds me, are the boys okay? I don’t think they’d be thrilled with so many drunk people.”  
  
Brooke lit up at the mention of “the boys,” nodding viciously. “They’re great! They’re locked up in my room with lots of pillows and toys where they’ll be safe.”

The first thought in Jeremy’s head was that Brooke had two boys locked in her room for kinky purposes. He frantically cursed himself, as this clearly wasn’t true…?

But Chloe just nodded like she understood completely. “Can I see them? I’ve gotta see the boys if I’m here.”

Brooke nodded again. “Yeah! Just let me get a drink first!”

And without saying goodbye, the two girls ran off into the amoeba of people.

Jeremy turned to Jenna, begging for an explanation. “What the fuck.”

“Brooke’s cats.” She stated simply.

“Oh.” That made a lot more sense. Then, “Oh!” Jeremy suddenly wished he’d gone with them. The boys sounded far better than the party.

“Hey,” Jenna said, “How about we both slam it at the same time?” She held up a cup, supposedly filled with the same thing that was in Jeremy’s.

“Uh…?”  
  
“I can tell you’re nervous. If we drink at the same time, it might help?”  
  
Jeremy glanced down at his drink. “Oh…”

“And…” Jenna thought for a second, “If one of us stops drinking, we owe the other one five dollars.”

Jeremy considered it. It was a sweet gesture, and God damn it he had to get drunk one way or another.

So he nodded. “On three?”  
  
Jenna nodded back and held up her cup. 

“Three…”  
  
Jeremy readied his as well.

“Two…”

Took a deep breath.

“One.”  
  
And downed the whole thing.

It was awful. It was the worst flavor Jeremy had ever experienced; like someone had put dirt and spoiled milk through a SodaStream machine.

But his competitive drive kept him going, engaging in the most metal staring contest with Jenna as she drank to see which one would break first.

She was the first to finish her drink, and Jeremy followed a second later. As soon as he was done he started coughing. “Jesus Christ that _is_  awful.”  
  
Jenna nodded, completely unaffected. “Yeah. But now that you’ve done the first one, the second one will be easier. Like going on a rollercoaster, you know?”  
  
“Yeah. Uh… thanks.”  
  
She smiled at him as Dustin re-appeared next to him with a new, un-crushed cup which he immediately thrust towards Jeremy. “I’m a genius,” He proclaimed, “I put in one of those juice boxes that aren’t actually boxes and are more like bags with it and it tastes like fruit punch. Try it.”  
  
Jeremy took that one more willingly and took a sip. It wasn’t fantastic, and still had an aftertaste, but he much preferred that aftertaste to the one he’d just experienced. He gave Dustin a nod of approval and took a bigger drink of the watered-down berry-blast blend.

“Where’d Brooke and Chloe go?” Dustin wondered aloud.

“Brooke took Chloe to visit the boys,” Jenna informed.

“The boys!” Dustin exclaimed, because apparently Jeremy was always the last to know. “I want to see them!”

“You’re too late, Kropp.”  
  
“Fuck!” Dustin took his drink back from Jeremy and took a judgemental gulp.

Jenna shrugged. “Sorry. I gotta get going. Apparently something’s up with Madeline and a guy from the badminton team, or something.”

“Is she going to write another essay about how mediocre sex with him is like she did with Jake? Because I’d really like to read that.”  
  
“Madeline did what now?” Jeremy blurted.

Jenna sighed and shook her head. “Who knows.”  
  
“Can I _pay_ her to write another essay about how mediocre sex with him is like she did with Jake?”  
  
Jenna simply rolled her eyes with a grin. “I’ll talk to you two later. Use protection.” And then she, too, vanished.

“And then there were two,” Said Dustin.

“Protection!?” Jeremy squeaked in horror, face going hot at the implication.

“Well if I’d known that’s what you wanted, I would’ve brought some,” Dustin teased, wrapping an arm around Jeremy’s waist. Jeremy hoped Dustin would be able to catch him because at this rate he felt as though his legs would give out.

“Sh- shut up.”

Dustin’s eyes went narrow. “Make me.”

Oh no. _Oh no._ “Buh- I- uh- sh-” He frantically searched for any type of distraction, “Uh, Brooke- she uh, told me something about you and Michael.”  
  
“Did she.”

“Yeah. She said Chloe was gonna like… ‘make him hot’ or something? And- and that she did that with you or- or something.”

That seemed to sufficiently take his mind off of the original topic. “Oh. I mean, kinda. I mean- yes, she’s gonna do that with Michael but like… she didn’t do _too_ much with me. I wasn’t a _total_ disaster.”

“And Michael is?”  
  
“Have you ever seen him without his hoodie on?”

“Um… yeah?”  
  
Dustin seemed very giddy as he asked, “On a scale from like, one to ten, with ten being ‘take me now,’ how fuckable?”

Jeremy wasn’t sure he’d heard correctly. He prayed he hadn’t. “Wh- I- _what!?_ ”

“On a scale from one to ten-”

So he had heard correctly. “I am _not_ answering that! Why do you care!?”

“Because I like hot boys and I like proving a point. Point is, Michael is a hot boy and under that tomato peel he’s gotta be packing-”

Jeremy wasn’t sure if he should be more horrified at the implication that Dustin had some sort of desire to fuck his best friend or the implication that tomatoes could be peeled. “Sh- he- shut up about him! It’s weird- I’m hot too, you know!” The moment the sentence left his mouth, he nearly froze. There was no way  _he_ had said that.

Dustin grinned up at him, looping his other arm around his waist so they were nearly chest to chest. Jeremy was pretty sure he’d spilled some of his drink on the floor in the process and was even more sure Dustin would be able to feel how crazy fast his heart was beating. “Correct,” Dustin said, “Which reminds me of what I was saying before you changed the topic-”  
  
“Y- you changed the topic too! What did Chloe do to you?”

“She just… taught me a couple basic aspects of life. Like not wearing denim on denim and not wearing stripes and polka dots. I was already doing okay though.”

Jeremy was hesitant to believe him. “... Okay.”  
  
Dustin’s arms retracted from Jeremy’s waist and he took another drink before insisting, “I was! When I met her, she was impressed with me.”

“Okay.”

“She was, I swear to God!” He gestured vaguely to the crowd in front of them. “I met her freshman year at another one of Jake’s parties, like this one. It was a bit smaller because we were freshman and Jake wasn’t as popular because he was new and stuff. I remember standing in the corner because… I… didn’t have a lot of friends. She and Jake and Brooke and everyone were dancing.” Dustin rolled his eyes as he mentioned, “Jake was playing Carly Rae Jepsen, because of fucking course he was. And all of a sudden she walks up to me- uh, Chloe, not Carly Rae Jepsen- Chloe walks up to me and asks me where I got my jacket from, you know, because I looked so insanely hot in it. And I tell her, and we talk for a minute. And then she looks at me and says, ‘you’re going to come dance with us,’ and I said, 'okay,' and we’ve been best friends ever since.”

As he told the story, Dustin punctuated every twist and turn with complete hand gestures, eyes lighting up by the end of it, which was adorable and reminded Jeremy of Christine. It was a rare instance where he could actually tell they were related.

“... Really?” He asked by the time Dustin was done.

“Yeah! So, uh… there you go. No idea what she’s gonna do with Michael, but I’m excited to see.”

“Uh-huh…” Jeremy mumbled, a little less sure.

Dustin finished off his drink and then motioned towards it. “Wanna get another with me?”

Jeremy bit his lip, letting the Michael topic die. “Shouldn’t you be pacing yourself?”  
  
“I mean, worst case scenario I die from God striking me down, so no.”  
  
Jeremy blinked at him, taken aback by the complete lack of an answer to his question.

Dustin laughed at his dumbfounded expression. “Just come on.”

Before Jeremy could argue, Dustin grabbed him by the hand and dragged towards the kitchen. So much for Jeremy’s liver.

  
  


They ran into Jake and Rich a while later. Jake was head-bopping enthusiastically, so much so that Jeremy was almost afraid that his neck would snap. Rich hung close next to him, back to the wall, and was the first to spot Jeremy and Dustin.

Somehow the induction of alcohol had resulted in people spreading out through Brooke’s (very large… where did her parents work?) house instead of hogging the dancefloor. Jake and Rich had placed themselves right next to the grand staircase, so they were hard to miss.

Rich waved to them and Jeremy eagerly made his way over, with Dustin trailing a little more reluctantly behind.

“Jeremy, dude!” Jake held his fist out for a fist bump, which Jeremy gave, but then Jake did the finger-wiggle thing away, and wait, Jeremy didn’t know they were doing that, he wasn’t committed, so Jake was the only one who did and Jeremy felt like he’d left him hanging and oh God-

Jake wasn’t nearly as disturbed. “Dust-man!”

“Never call me that again and please shut up.”

Jeremy took a deep breath once the moment had passed. He noticed that Rich seemed quiet, eyes darting around the room. He cleared his throat and quietly asked, “Um, you okay?” 

Rich gave a small nod right as Jake clapped him on the back roughly, making him tense up. He looked almost nauseous. “Rich here,” Jake explained, “wasn’t feeling that well, so we’re having a little time out over here.”

“What’s up?” Jeremy asked. Dustin seemed suddenly uninterested for some reason, checking his phone as if he’d totally checked out.

“Nothing,” Rich responded, his voice a little scratchy as if he hadn’t been talking much recently. He cleared his throat and continued, “Just, um, a lot. You know.”  
  
Jeremy knew _very_ well. The party was overwhelming to him, too. Though, looking at Rich’s face long enough was enough to tell him that Rich was clearly having it way worse. 

Despite the slight buzz in Jeremy’s brain- the alcohol was clearly starting to hit- it started making sense to him. Rich probably hadn’t been to a party since Halloween, and that was a terrible experience. This was probably a little too reminiscent of that to him. Besides, if Rich was really as “lame” as he proclaimed himself to be freshman year, he’d probably only started going to parties as a result of the squip. Jeremy wondered if he even really liked parties in the first place.

Either way, Rich’s eyes were pleading as Jeremy stared at him, shooting such a clear message of “please, God, get me out of here,” that Jeremy almost thought telepathy was real.

Glancing up at Jake’s aloof, Colgate grin was enough to tell Jeremy that he probably didn’t grasp the reality of the situation. Plus he was probably drunk. Dustin was still uninterested, so it was probably up to Jeremy to save the poor boy.

Jeremy sighed and said, “Um, Jake? I think I’m gonna take Rich to the bathroom.”

Jake frowned down at Rich. “What? What’s wrong? Lemme come with you.”  
  
Rich gave a frantic shake of his head to Jeremy. Jeremy coughed and frantically attempted, “Uh… uh… well, I wouldn’t want to drag you away from your awesome party! Let me handle it, uh, bro…?”

“Jesus Christ,” Dustin mumbled. Whether at something on his phone or at Jeremy’s incompetence, Jeremy had no idea.

Jake shook his head. “Nuh-uh, my best friend is more important than any party.”

“She actually did it,” Dustin marveled. Jeremy had no idea what he was looking at.

“Uh… It’s… really fine?” Jeremy tried. Rich looked like he was trying the same become-a-painting technique Jeremy had attempted earlier.

Thankfully, on purpose or not, it didn’t matter, Dustin announced, “Madeline wrote another essay.”

That managed to catch Jake’s attention. He turned to Dustin, eyes wide in panic. “Huh!?” 

“Not about you,” Dustin added, “Look-” he shoved his phone in Jake’s face.  
  
Jeremy took one look at Rich, who nodded at them, and they both did their best to slip away without being noticed.

“Bathroom?” Jeremy asked, since it was the first thing he spotted down the hall and because it seemed like the most private place.

“Yeah. But um… the upstairs one.”  
  
“Why?” Rich was already heading up the grand staircase. Jeremy heard Dustin laugh loudly from somewhere behind him.

“Because… less people? More likely to be empty? Brooke kept upstairs off limits but, I don’t think she’ll care if we’re there.”

Jeremy just hummed and followed behind. He managed to trip up the last couple of stairs like an idiot, but he didn’t know if that was from alcohol or just from him being him.

The hallway at the top of the stairs was dark, but Rich easily navigated into the bathroom, which was surprisingly large (then again, so was the rest of Brooke’s house). He flicked on the lights, then practically collapsed on the floor with a sigh.

Jeremy kneeled down next to him on the cool ceramic. “So.”

“Sorry,” Was the first thing Rich blurted, “I just-”  
  
“I know. It’s okay,” Jeremy assured. Then, because he was genuinely curious, “Why did you even come?”  
  
Rich ran a hand through his hair and shook his head with a huff. “I don’t know- I just- Jake was expecting me and I know I’m supposed to be the ‘Real Richard Goranski’ or whatever but I didn’t want to let him down, and I dunno, I thought it would be fun? And I wanted to get out of the house…”  
  
Jeremy winced. He’d forgotten about that. “Oh…”

“I dunno, I just… it backfired. Sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing? I totally get it. I’m sorry.”

Rich just shook his head, closed his eyes, and curled in on himself. He looked smaller than ever.

Jeremy wanted to tell him to get out of the party ASAP, but he knew there wasn’t much of an option for him. He wished he could give Rich an easy out, a safe haven, or even just a ride.

His brain buzzed on the brink of an idea. He shouted, “Shit!” as he grasped at straws.

Rich looked up at him. “What?” 

“Mi… uh…” He snapped his fingers, trying to give himself a lightbulb. Mi… Mitchell… “ _Michael!_ ”

“... What?”

“Michael can give you a ride! And you can stay at his house! No party, uh, you’ll feel better!” Jeremy explained, feeling a little proud of his own intelligence. It was a flawless idea.

Rich blinked a couple of times, then laughed a little. “I don’t think Michael really likes me. Probably a bad-”  
  
Jeremy was already pulling out his phone and scrolling through his text messages, clicking Michael’s name and then the call button. The phone started ringing and he put it on speaker. “Don’t worry, Michael will understand.”  
  
“I don’t think-”  
  
“ _Hey,_ ” said Michael through the phone, “ _Done already?_ ”

“No, but come get Rich,” Jeremy said. He realized after the beat of silence that Michael had not, in fact, been there for their conversation and had no idea what that meant. “Uh, he’s not really doing so hot so I was wondering if you could keep him for a while?”  
  
“ _… What?_ ”

“Like… just let him stay at your house for a little while or something?”

“ _No. No way_.”

Rich sighed and looked away. He looked grim.

“Please?” Jeremy begged, “Please please please please-”

“ _I’m really not in the mood to be near him._ ”

“What!?” Jeremy exclaimed as Rich practically deflated, “Don’t be rude, he can hear you!”  
  
“ _… Wait, what?_ ”

“Hi,” Rich said softly, voice a little crackly.

“ _Oh._ ”

Jeremy understood the issue, of course. Michael had made his gripes with Rich clear from the start. But this seemed a little more important than Michael’s slight pettiness. What was it that Dustin had said earlier?

“Just get over yourself,” Jeremy groaned, repeating what his boyfriend had said, “He’s gonna start crying on the bathroom floor if you don’t hurry.”  
  
“Jeremy-” Rich started, yanking the phone out of his hand.

“ _Wait, is he okay?_ ”  
  
“Hey!” Jeremy whined. How dare Rich steal his phone right in the middle of his conversation!

“Yeah, I- sorry,” Rich assured, “Just kinda was overwhelmed, claustrophobic, but I’m good now, sorry to bother you bye!” He rushed at the end, reaching to hang up.

“ _No, hold on. Is it… like really bad?_ ”  
  
Rich hesitated. Jeremy crossed his arms and sighed at how rudely he was ejected from the conversation.

“I mean…” Rich mumbled. “I’ll be fine.”  
  
There was a long silence over the line. Then, a sigh, a rustle of fabric, and a faint jingle of keys. “ _Do you_ seriously _need me to get you?_ ”

“No!” Rich insisted, “I’m good.”  
  
“Yes!” Jeremy argued, attempting to lunge and grab his phone back, to which Rich just sighed and gave up without much of a fight. “Please come get him?”  
  
Another pause. Then, “ _I’ll be there in fifteen_.”  
  
Jeremy lit up. He knew he could always count on Michael to pull through! “Thank y-”  
  
Michael hung up before Jeremy could finish. He shrugged, clicked his phone off, and turned to Rich. “Well, there you go.”  
  
“Yeah. Thanks.” Rich crossed his arms and glanced at him. “Are you drunk?”

Jeremy was definitely feeling warm and buzzy at that point. A little out of it. “Getting there, I think.”

“Great.”  
  
“Hey, you’ll get to talk to Michael!” Jeremy remembered, “That’s fun! Maybe you can tell him how you feel!”

Rich looked away again. “I don’t-”

“You’ll figure something out! You flirt with him like all the time-”  
  
“This is different-”  
  
“Nuh-uh! You can do it.”  
  
Rich went a little red-faced, opened his mouth like he was going to argue, then just sighed and asked, “Don’t you think Dustin is waiting for you?”  
  
Dustin. Dustin? “Dustin! Shit, I forgot.”

“Yeah. Go ahead. I’ll find Michael once he’s here. Thanks for the ride.”

“Uh, okay.” Jeremy got to his feet. The world spun for a millisecond. Once he was sure he wouldn’t fall, he waved to Rich and made his way to the door. “Later.”  
  
“Bye.”  
  
Jeremy left him to his own and made his way back to the staircase. Staring down it daunted him, and he clung to the railing as he took one careful step down after another. When he was safely on the ground floor again, he realized Dustin and Jake had disappeared from their original spot. Uh oh.

He ended up looping around the house, stopping in the kitchen for another drink and a handful of chips, waving hi to Brooke (who… had her arms around some tall, pretty girl?), and finishing outside on a porch. 

Brooke’s yard was just as huge as her house, complete with a pool (that was currently closed for winter) and a fancy electric fire pit that was on for the enjoyment of partygoers. He stopped and sat next to it, intending to pull out his phone and text Dustin while fending off the chill.

He shivered a little as he scrolled through his text messages until he found Dustin, starting to tap in a “where are you”.

“Hey.”  
  
Jeremy yelped and nearly flung his phone into the fire. Chloe laughed and took a seat across from him. “Relax.”  
  
“Sorry,” Said Jeremy, laughing sheepishly.

It crept up on him that it was just she and him. Alone. In the dark. And he started to feel a little uneasy. But then again…

“Are, uh, are you drunk?” He asked quickly.

She seemed bright-eyed, upright. Alert. She didn’t slur a single word when she said, “Eh. Barely tipsy. I just had like… not even two drinks.”

“Why?”  
  
Chloe eyed him for a long moment, then shrugged. “Didn’t feel like it.”  
  
“Oh.” Jeremy didn’t argue, and mostly let himself relax. It made sense...? No, it didn’t, Chloe was a huge partier, but he was just glad she was mostly sober.

“So…” He said.

“Hm?”

Even in his slower headspace, Jeremy sensed the awkwardness. For lack of a better conversation idea, he blurted, “Are you really gonna make Michael hot like you did with Dustin?”  
  
She laughed a little and crossed one leg over the other. “Darling, he’s already hot. I’m just gonna accentuate it.”  
  
“I… okay? Just… don’t do anything too weird. He’s kinda sensitive and I don’t want you treating him like you treat Brooke.”  
  
“... What?”  
  
Whoops. Jeremy definitely hadn’t meant to let that slip. “No- nothing! I just meant…” 

She gave him a withering glare and he shrunk away. He swallowed nervously and continued, “I just, uh, wow sorry I really gotta pee-”

Before he could stand up, Chloe demanded, “ _Wait_ ,” in a voice that Jeremy could absolutely not object to.  
  
After that outburst, she stared down to the fire, almost meekly, and asked, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Uh… you… I dunno,” Jeremy begged the last functioning scraps of his brain to come together to help him form a cohesive thought. “You’re just kinda controlling with her? I dunno, that’s just what I notice. And when I talked to her she was kinda putting herself down as the ‘second best,’ or something, I might not remember that right. Uh… yeah, please don’t kill me-”

Chloe didn’t look away from the dancing flames. They lit her unusually blank face as if she were ready to tell a campfire story. She said, “Oh. Well.” And went silent.

“... Sorry.”  
  
“No, it’s… fine.”

Quiet stretched on outlandishly long as a Brittany Spears song switched on inside. Chloe was as still as a statue, and Jeremy felt as fidgety as a squirrel.

After a couple minutes, Chloe quietly asked, “Want to go get another drink?” To which Jeremy vehemently nodded. It sounded like just what he needed.

They headed back into the kitchen and Jeremy grabbed another solo cup. He headed to a small drink cooler with “VODKA” written crudely across it in sharpie. As he filled his cup, he heard Chloe mumble something about Dustin’s backpack being a Mary Poppins bag.

“Aren’t you gonna get one?” He asked her before taking a sip. Gross. Where were those Capri Suns Dustin mentioned?

He turned and Chloe was sipping on an aforementioned juice bag, standing next to a box of even more. He grabbed one, stabbed it with the straw, and poured half of it in his drink as she said, “Like I said. Don’t feel like it.”

Jeremy didn’t complain, taking a sip. Much better.

Out of the corner of his eye he spotted Dustin’s backpack, empty and on the floor. It reminded him of their original conversation, and he looked back to Chloe. “Dustin told me how you and him met.”  
  
Chloe smiled a little. “Did he?”

“Yeah. You asked him to dance. That was, uh… cool of you? I never thought you’d do something like that.”  
  
Her smile evaporated, her brow furrowing. “I… wouldn’t. That never happened.”

“... Huh? I thought you complimented him and then…” Jeremy paused. Given, his brain was kind of scrambled, so, “I may be remembering wrong, I dunno.”  
  
“Yeah, you are. Or-” Her eyes widened, and she started to laugh as she crossed her arms. “He lied to you. God, what a dumbass.”

Jeremy’s heart twinged a little at the rude nickname, because Dustin didn't deserve any sort of insult! “Nuh-uh! He said…”

“That is _not_ what happened. He just wanted to look cool. He tries _really_ hard to impress you, you know that?”  
  
“... Huh,” Jeremy marveled, taking a drink. “So… then what happened?”

Chloe sighed, eyes going a little glazy as if reminiscing over a fond memory. She leaned back on the granite counter and Jeremy popped over next to her. “Well… it was freshman year. And it was at another one of Jake’s parties. It was small, because Jake wasn’t nearly as popular as he is now-”  
  
Jeremy felt a sense of ah-ha! wash over him. “Yeah, that’s what he said! See, he’s not lying.”  
  
Chloe ignored him and continued, “I was dancing with Jake, ‘cause we were dating at that time." She scoffed and groaned as she added, "Jake was playing Carly Rae Jepsen, because of fucking course he was. And I noticed this kid standing over in the corner all by himself, staring at my boyfriend.” She paused, and smiled down at Jeremy, “I really doubt he’s told you this, but Dustin had a massive crush on Jake for like, _years_.”  
  
Jeremy’s stomach dropped a little. “He did?”

“Yeah. It was really bad. So, I see this kid and immediately I’m like, ‘hell no,’ so I walk over to him fully intending to beat his ass. And… God. Dustin was a _total_ disaster. He was just standing all by himself, drinking beer out of a vase.”

“What?” Jeremy giggled incredulously at the image.

“It’s true! And he’s got giant nerdy glasses, and I see this and I kinda relax because okay, he’s a nobody, he’s clearly not a threat. And I think he was scared of me? I walked up to him and I asked him what his name was. He tells me ‘Dustin Kropp,’ and then I remember Jake talking about him and I realize that this is his plug. And the longer I’m looking at him the more I’m thinking, like, ethically. Because this is the central dealer which means he has a lot of influence, which can be helpful to me-”

“ _That’s_ what you were thinking?”

Chloe shot him a deadpan look. “Jerry. I was a freshman. If there was an opportunity to help save my ass from the social hell of sophomores and upperclassmen, I was going to take it.

“So I’m thinking that maybe humoring this guy could be helpful, plus maybe getting close to him would help me keep him away from Jake, because _maybe_ I was still a little paranoid. And then I kinda looked at his face, and I realize he’s kinda hot too, and maybe if we can ditch the glasses and the vase and stuff, I could actually make something presentable out of him. So I say, ‘I can work with this,’ and he goes, ‘uh, what?’ and we’ve been best friends ever since.”

Jeremy blinked, struggling to absorb everything he’d just heard. “Uh... wow.”

“So yeah. Now you know.”

“That’s wild.”

Chloe nodded, then took a long, slow sip of her Capri Sun. “Thank me later.”  
  
Jeremy finished off his drink, feeling sufficiently woozy. "Yeah, his story was a lot different."  
  
Chloe snickered. "I'll bet."  
  
There was a minute of silence where Jeremy grabbed a shot off the counter. He slammed it back and it stung his throat. Through coughs, he asked, "How are the boys?"

Chloe's eyes lit up. "The boys! They're great. They were taking a nap when Brooke took me to see them."

"Mood," Jeremy said, filling half of a cup with water and downing it to get rid of the burn in his throat. When he turned back to Chloe, she was frowning.

“What’s wrong?” He asked her.

“I… actually, um, I think I’m gonna go find Brooke if that’s okay with you.”  
  
Jeremy nodded, “Uh, okay. Have fun.”  
  
She returned a small smile and nodded. “You too, Jeremy.” And then she walked out and down the hall, heels clicking all the way.

When Jeremy was alone, he was left wondering what had led him into the kitchen in the first place. Chloe… fire… Dustin…

“Dustin!” Jeremy gasped aloud. He nearly ran out of the kitchen and into the living room, searching for the boy. Dustin was so cool, he thought. So nice and warm and awesome-

He moved past the staircase, into the hall, checking every room for his date. Given, in his considerably drunk state, it was more like a half-assed scan. 

He finally found him in what appeared to be the dining room, with a table large enough to fit Michael’s entire family (which, including all extended cousins and cousins twice removed, was considerably big). Dustin was still standing with Jake, chatting and smiling like he was having a great time.

He’d been with Jake an awful long time, hadn’t he? He’d never gone to check on Jeremy, Jeremy thought with sinking suspicion. What was that Chloe had said?

Jeremy eyed Jake, who had his arm braced on the wall for support as he leaned against it in the most lax, jockish way possible. The way Dustin was nodding to everything he said set a fire in Jeremy’s stomach.

He remembered suddenly: Dustin had apparently had a crush on Jake. A long one. Oh no.

But that wasn’t allowed, Jeremy thought with a huff. Dustin was _his_ boyfriend. Jake with his stupid charming grin and, and stupid charming _everything_ \- what did he think he was doing?

Jeremy stormed across the room to where they stood. Dustin was laughing at something Jake said, which was _absolutely_  unacceptable, as Jake smiled down at him with his stupidly perfect teeth. Jeremy wished he could punch the teeth out of his face.

Barging in on Jake mid-sentence, Jeremy announced himself with a loud, “ _Hey_.”

Dustin didn’t seem to notice the obvious issue for some reason, turning to Jeremy with a relaxed grin. “Hey. Where’d you go?”  
  
Jeremy faintly registered Jake greeting him with a, “Hey bro!” But he paid no mind as he grabbed Dustin’s hand.

“What’s going on here?” Jeremy slurred.

Dustin began, “Jake was just saying-”

“ _Jake_ , _”_ Jeremy spat as if the man wasn’t two feet away from him.

Dustin and Jake exchanged a look Jeremy didn’t like- too much eye contact- and Jake nervously laughed, “Uh, yeah… is there a problem?”

“ _Yes._ ” Jeremy turned to him, finally acknowledging his existence.

He raised his and Dustin’s joined hands right in front of Jake’s face and eloquently stated, “This is my boyfriend.”

Jake stared between Jeremy and their hands, then cocked his head like a confused dog. “Yes?”  
  
“Understand?”

“Yes?”

“Good.” Jeremy turned to Dustin, who was completely bewildered. “We’re leaving.”

Dustin blinked at him. “Michael doesn’t arrive to pick us up until one.”

Jeremy froze. Shit. What time was it? What was time? Who the fuck invented numbers? Why was Dustin so good at numbers? He could even tell what time it was, how fucking amazing was that? Why was Dustin so perfect?

“We’re…” Jeremy started again, rerouting, “We’re going over here!” And with that conclusion, he dragged Dustin away before Jake could get a word in.

He brought Dustin to what looked like an office. It was empty, which made sense because work was boring.

Dustin still seemed confused, and Jeremy decided that confused was an adorable look on him, with his furrowed brow and almost pout. “Hey, what was that?"

“I didn’t like how he was looking at you,” Jeremy stated simply.

“... What?”

“ _I’m_ your boyfriend so _I’m_ the only one who gets to look at you.”

Dustin paused, then honest to god _giggled_ which was so adorable it nearly distracted Jeremy from why he was so pissed. “Well I think you’re gonna have a rough time with that babe, because people have these things called eyes-”

“Not what I meant! I just-” Jeremy groaned, trying to figure out how to explain, “Please… don’t kiss him?”

Dustin only giggled more. “Aw, is someone jealous?”

“No!” Jeremy insisted. Wait, yeah, that _was_ the word he was looking for! Dustin was so good at words! “I mean, yeah! Yes!”

“Well I promise you,” Dustin assured through a laugh, “That you’re the only person I want to kiss.” He took a couple of steps towards Jeremy, seeming to sway a little, and Jeremy realized that he must be pretty hammered too.

“Well good!”

Dustin stared at him for a moment, then broke down into a heap of laughing and giggling for no real reason. He clapped a hand over his mouth as if to try and hold it in. 

Jeremy looked down at him, anger evaporating like mist fueled by hearing that laugh, and he couldn’t help but to snicker a little along with him. 

Dustin was so incredible, he thought, and Jeremy was so ridiculously lucky and happy when he was with him. And wow, he really was just that cute. So cute that Jeremy wanted to kiss him. A lot.

So he did. He grabbed Dustin’s hand away from his mouth, leaned down, and kissed him. It seemed to take Dustin by surprise, if his little, “Mmph!” was anything to go by, but he melted into it quickly, wrapping his arms around Jeremy’s neck and pressing closer to him.

The kiss deepened quickly, and Jeremy had no idea what to do if he was being honest. He’d never actually made out with anyone, especially not Dustin beyond innocent, harmless pecks. This was new territory.

So Jeremy did what he did best: made shit up on the spot. He wrapped his arms around Dustin’s waist and pulled him closer. From there he just did what he felt like. A swipe of the tongue here, a nervous nip there. It didn’t really matter, as long as Dustin seemed to like it.

And Dustin seemed to _really_ like it. Without warning, he hoisted himself up and wrapped his legs around Jeremy’s waist. This was cute in theory, until considering that Jeremy was both inebriated and had the arm strength of an incompetent infant.

He stumbled forward unsteadily, panic shooting through him at the thought of accidentally dropping Dustin. Thankfully, the office desk came to his rescue. As he half-fell and half-dropped Dustin, Dustin landed on the oak wood with a loud _clank._

Jeremy gripped the edge of the desk to steady himself. “Holy shit, are you okay!?”

But Dustin just started to giggle again, as if nothing was wrong. “I’m good. Sorry.”

“No, ’s fine-”

Before Jeremy could apologize any more, Dustin grabbed him by the shoulders and yanked him closer for another kiss. His knees banged against the side of the desk and their teeth clacked uncomfortably. Jeremy quickly pulled away. “Ow!”

“Fuck, sorry-”

Jeremy would’ve responded, but he suddenly realized how close he and Dustin were which made him feel lightheaded. His hands were pressed firmly on the desk on either side of Dustin’s hips, their noses inches apart. Dustin had such pretty eyes, he thought. So dark and mysterious and sexy-

Dustin had gotten over their hiccup and was wrapping his arms around Jeremy’s neck again as he stole another kiss, then another, then another. He broke off only to laugh, quickly scan Jeremy up and down, and say, “You’re _really_ tall.”

That was, in fact, true! “Uh, yeah!” Dustin was so smart.

Dustin gave Jeremy an adorable grin, then leaned forward and buried his face against his shoulder.

“Uh, so,” Jeremy coughed, “What now?”

“Hm?”

"What do you wanna do?"

Dustin didn’t respond, but he did press a kiss on the side of Jeremy’s neck, which made Jeremy’s chest feel all tingly.

“... That’s fine too,” Jeremy mumbled. Another kiss. Jeremy’s arms were starting to feel shaky and he was worried he wouldn’t be able to hold himself up. 

Dustin pulled back for a moment. “You’re cute.”

Jeremy’s face went warm. “Uh, well, you’re cuter,” He said, because it was a fact.

Dustin immediately frowned. “Uh, no. _You_ are.”

“No, _you_ are!”

“ _You_ are!”

For a lack of better word, Jeremy stuck his tongue out at him, and Dustin gasped as if he’d been shot. Which made Jeremy laugh, which sent Dustin back into an infectious giggle loop, which made Jeremy laugh even harder, and soon they were in stitches over nothing while the bass pumped on outside.

Jeremy gently rested his forehead against Dustin’s once he’d managed to calm himself down a little.

“You’re still cuter,” Dustin muttered with a grin.

Jeremy scoffed and leaned down to press a kiss against Dustin’s jaw, because two could play at that game. Dustin’s head immediately tilted back, opening up his neck, which Jeremy eagerly moved down to, peppering kisses everywhere. He brushed over Dustin’s pulse point, which was racing crazy fast. Jeremy felt a little surge of pride.

After a moment he pulled back to stare at Dustin, who stared back at him and smiled. There was a light blush dusting his cheeks. Jeremy didn’t think he’d ever seen Dustin blush before. It was cute. Dustin was cute. Dustin was beautiful.

Before he could process the words coming out of his mouth, Jeremy said, with the most coherency he’d had in hours, “Do you want to come back to my house?”

“... What?”  
  
Jeremy repeated, “Do you want to come back to my house?”

Dustin paused as if to process the question. Then he nodded. “Yeah. Yes. _Yes._ ”

“Cool. Uh, let me text Michael.” Jeremy started to pull away, but Dustin reached forward and wrapped his arms around his waist, clinging to him before he could escape.

Jeremy sighed, but made no move to push him off because Dustin was warm and Jeremy wasn’t stupid. He fumbled for his phone with one hand and sent a barely understandable text to Michael asking to pick them up early. Dustin rested his head against his chest and started to laugh at nothing again.

“Your laugh is cute,” Jeremy informed him as he nearly dropped his phone trying to slide it back in his pocket.

“... Really?” Dustin asked, voice muffled against his chest.

“Yeah!"

Dustin didn’t respond after that, just squeezed Jeremy a little tighter. Jeremy wrapped his arms around Dustin’s back, thoroughly enjoying the heat he radiated.

“If I fall asleep before Michael gets here, shove me,” Dustin mumbled to him, practically nuzzling into Jeremy’s chest.

“Wh- we’re just gonna stay like this?”

Dustin just hummed an affirmation, and Jeremy sighed. He didn’t object, because truly, he didn’t mind.

They stayed like that a while, alone, savoring each other with the only sounds being the ambiance outside, and didn’t move again until Jeremy’s phone dinged with a one-word message from Michael: “ _Here._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jesus. Fucking Christ.
> 
> Tbh I wanted to have this one sooner and I sincerely apologize but i hope the length makes up for it??? I dunno. I realized this will be my last chapter of the year, which is amazing because it means this fic is officially one year old. isn't that crazy?
> 
> anyways, i hope you enjoyed. happy new year!

**Author's Note:**

> AUTHOR'S REMINDER: Please don't do drugs. The scenario presented in this story is 99.99% unlikely to happen, and it isn't wise to risk law enforcement and possible cancer to get to score a sexy badboy stoner boyfriend.
> 
> If this scenario does end up happening to you, though, hmu because hOLY SHIT.


End file.
